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Jewish marriage rites are robust. Now a rabbi is innovating rituals for Jews who divorce.
(J. The Jewish News of Northern California via JTA) — For Lyssa Jaye, throwing the wood chips into the Tuolumne River felt in many ways familiar to the tashlich ritual performed on Rosh Hashanah. But rather than casting off her sins, she was tossing away feelings: shame, resentment, anger.
They were the emotions that had taken residence inside Jaye since her divorce eight years ago, along with a sense of failure. And she had come to a Jewish retreat to rid herself of them.
“I’ve been carrying around these feelings for years now,” Jaye said. “I have a completely different life now, and I needed to let them go.”
Jaye was taking part in Divorce & Discovery: A Jewish Healing Retreat, the first-ever gathering in a series conceived by Rabbi Deborah Newbrun as part of her training, held this month at Camp Tawonga in the Bay Area.
One of the requirements at the Pluralistic Rabbinical Seminary, where Newbrun was ordained last year in the first graduating class, “was that each of us had to do an innovation, or something that didn’t exist before,” she said.
Newbrun, who directed Camp Tawonga for more than two decades, has been recognized for innovative programming for such achievements as initiating Tawonga’s LGBT family camp and founding its wilderness department. She even won a prestigious 2018 Covenant Award for Jewish educators. But as she started thinking about how to fulfill the seminary requirement, her first thought was, “I don’t have any ideas left in me.”
Then she began reflecting back on her divorce years earlier. She remembered how she had approached numerous rabbis and colleagues in search of Jewish support around the grief she felt. And how they all came up empty-handed.
That’s when she realized: “I can put together something meaningful and helpful for people going through divorce.”
From the moment participants arrived at Camp Tawonga near Yosemite, they knew this would be no ordinary Jewish retreat. At the opening event, all of the facilitators, several clergy members and a therapist shared their own divorce stories, “to set the standard and normalize vulnerability, transparent sharing and establish that we all know what it’s like to have a marriage end,” Newbrun said.
Most participants were from the Bay Area, with a handful from farther afield. They were in different life stages, from those in their 30s dealing with custody battles over young children, to empty nesters in their 60s. Some had separated from their partners years ago, while others had gone their separate ways more recently. Some split amicably; a good many did not. But all had come up against a lack of Jewish resources or support when navigating this major life passage.
Rabbi Deborah Newbrun, the founder of Divorce and Discovery at the recent weekend. (Photo/Margot Yecies)
Jaye said she left no stone unturned in seeking out support, an experience Newbrun said she heard echoed by many participants. Jaye attended a retreat at a local meditation center. She read self-help books. She joined a support group for divorcees. She went to therapy.
And while they all helped in different ways, none was specifically Jewish.
“I knew I needed some kind of spiritual way forward,” she said. “I needed to do this in my own language, with my own people.”
Even though the retreat came nearly a decade years after Jaye’s divorce, “it was profound. It felt like coming home, and that this is what I needed all along. This model could be extremely powerful. The rituals we did could be taught in rabbinical schools or to Jewish educators so it’s not just ‘sign this get and goodbye,’” she said, referring to the Jewish divorce document.
Rather than create new rituals, Newbrun and her facilitators took familiar Jewish rituals and retooled them.
The tashlich ritual, led by Newbrun and Maggid Jhos Singer, had a call-and-response portion, and participants also could call out what they personally wanted to cast off. “One person ‘tashliched’ their wedding ring into the river and felt it was such a perfect place to let it go!” said Newbrun.
An optional immersion in the Tuolumne River followed. Jaye, who years ago went to the mikvah alone, with only the attendant there for support, said there was no comparison with how much more healing it felt performing the ritual in community.
A session on sitting shiva for one’s marriage, led by Rabbi Sue Reinhold, allowed participants to share and mourn the loss of what they missed most about being married. That resonated for Robyn Lieberman, who does not attend synagogue services but went to every session at the retreat on innovating Jewish rituals.
“I did need to mourn what I’m losing,” said Lieberman, who had been married to an Israeli. “We had a very public, open house around Jewish religion, and a constant Israeli identity, which fulfilled my Jewish needs.”
Rabbi Jennie Chabon of Congregation B’nai Tikvah in Walnut Creek reflected on how much time she has spent with couples preparing for their wedding day, both in premarital counseling and in planning the event, and on how many marriage-related topics are covered in rabbinical school.
“And when it comes to divorce? Nothing,” Chabon said. “We’re all out here on our own trying to figure out how to wander through it.”
She was tasked with creating a havdalah ceremony with a divorce theme, in which she reimagined the wine, spices and flame typically used to mark a division between Shabbat and the rest of the week.
“There’s a fire that burns within each of us, and that flame doesn’t go out,” said Chabon, 47. “When you’re married for a long time, your identity, energy and spirit is so woven into that of another.” Her ritual was meant to affirm that “you are on fire just as you are, and you’re a blessing as an individual in the world. You don’t need a partnership or family to be whole.”
Even the Shabbat Torah service was on theme.
Rabbi Jennie Chabon reads from the Torah during a service at the Divorce and Discovery retreat. (Photo/Margot Yecies)
Rather than focusing on Noah’s emergence from the ark after the flood, Chabon spoke about a lesser-known section of the week’s Torah portion, in which Noah builds a fire and offers a sacrifice to God. But if the entire earth was drenched from the flood, Chabon asked, what did he burn?
“The answer is he must have burned the ark,” Chabon said in recalling her talk at the retreat. “What does that mean for people going through this incredibly painful and tender time in their lives, when what was once a safe container and secure and protected them, they have to burn it down in order to start life anew?
“This is a perfect rebirth metaphor. But what’s being birthed is a new self and a new identity in the world as a single person,” Chabon said. “You have to release and let go of what was to make room for the blessing for who you’re going to become.”
At a ritual “hackathon” workshop presented by Newbrun, participants suggested standing during Kaddish at synagogue to mourn their marriages, and offering their children a Friday night blessing that they are whole whether they are at either parent’s home.
Not all of the sessions centered on Jewish ritual. In a session on the Japanese art of kintsugi, or mending broken pottery, attendees made vessels whose cracks they fixed with putty, symbolizing that beauty can be found in imperfection. Many danced in a Saturday-night silent disco.
Everyone was assigned to a small group, or havurah, that they met with daily, so they could establish deeper connections within the larger cohort.
“To have gone through some of these practices was very meaningful to me,” said Lieberman. “It’s not like I put a seal on my marriage and wrapped it up in a bow and put it behind me, but it was a nice catharsis for completing a transition that I’ve been very thoughtful about.”
Newbrun aims to recreate the retreat in communities around the country. Both Jaye and Lieberman said they found value in being in community with people “who get it,” without the judgment they often face.
“I was a little skeptical that all I’d have in common with people was that we were Jewish and divorced, and that that wouldn’t be enough for me to form a relationship,” said Lieberman. “But having the willingness to talk about it and explore it did open up a lot of very vulnerable conversations. The expert facilitation really made us think about the fact that divorce is not about your paper [certificate], it’s about reexamining the direction of your life and who you want to be.”
A version of this piece originally ran in J. The Jewish News of Northern California, and is reprinted with permission.
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Yemen’s Aden Airport Shuts as Saudi-UAE Rift Deepens
Passengers wait for their flights at Aden Airport in Aden, Yemen, Jan. 1, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Fawaz Salman
Flights at Yemen’s Aden international airport were halted on Thursday, the latest sign of a deepening crisis between Gulf powers Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates, whose rivalry is reshaping war-torn Yemen.
At the airport — the main international gateway for parts of Yemen outside Houthi control — passengers crowded the terminal, waiting for updates on their flights.
Later on Thursday, Yemeni sources said flights between Aden and all destinations outside the UAE would resume, though Reuters was unable to confirm that immediately.
Air traffic was shut down due to a row over curbs on flights to the UAE, though there were contradictory accounts of exactly what had happened and who was responsible.
Awadh al-Subaihi said he had been waiting at the airport for a flight to Cairo for medical treatment. “We are suffering, and many other patients and elderly people here are waiting in a difficult situation,” he said.
The UAE backs the separatist Southern Transitional Council (STC) that seized swathes of southern Yemen from the internationally recognized government last month.
Saudi Arabia, which backs the government, regarded that move as a threat, triggering the biggest crisis between it and Gulf neighbor the UAE in decades.
The UAE-backed STC controls the transport ministry in the internationally recognized coalition government, whose main leadership is supported by Saudi Arabia.
The ministry accused Saudi Arabia in a statement of imposing an air blockade, saying Riyadh had instituted measures requiring all flights to go via Saudi Arabia for extra checks.
It added that when it objected to this, Saudi Arabia had clarified that the restriction was only on flights between Aden and the UAE.
DISAGREEMENT OVER WHO IS RESPONSIBLE
A Saudi source denied any involvement in restricting flights, adding that Yemen’s own internationally recognized government had imposed the requirement on flights between Aden and the UAE in order to curb escalating tensions.
The Saudi source added that the southern-controlled ministry had then responded by ordering a full shutdown of air traffic rather than comply with the restrictions on flights to and from the UAE.
An official source at the transport minister’s office denied this, saying the minister had not issued any decisions to close the airport.
Reuters could not immediately reach the leadership of the internationally recognized government, which has been in Saudi Arabia since the STC seized swathes of the south last month, for comment on the airport closure and flight restrictions.
The UAE Foreign Ministry did not immediately reply to a request for comment on the airport closure.
The tussle is the latest in a deepening crisis in Yemen that has exposed a deep rift between the two Gulf oil powers.
Saudi Arabia this week accused the UAE of pressuring Yemen’s STC to push towards the kingdom’s borders and declared its national security a “red line,” prompting the UAE to say it was pulling its remaining forces out of Yemen.
That followed an airstrike by Saudi-led coalition forces on the southern Yemeni port of Mukalla that the coalition said was a dock used to provide foreign military support to the separatists.
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Several Reported Killed in Iran Protests Sparked by Economic Hardships
People walk past closed shops, following protests over a plunge in the currency’s value, in the Tehran Grand Bazaar in Tehran, Iran, Dec. 30, 2025. Photo: Majid Asgaripour/WANA (West Asia News Agency) via REUTERS
Several people were killed during unrest in Iran, Iranian media and rights groups said on Thursday, as the biggest protests to hit the Islamic Republic for three years over worsening economic conditions sparked violence in several provinces.
The semi-official Fars news agency reported that three protesters were killed and 17 were injured during an attack on a police station in Iran‘s western province of Lorestan.
“The rioters entered the police headquarters around 1800 (local time) on Thursday … they clashed with police forces and set fire to several police cars,” Fars reported.
Earlier, Fars and rights group Hengaw reported deaths in Lordegan city in the country’s Charmahal and Bakhtiari province. Authorities confirmed one death in the western city of Kuhdasht, and Hengaw reported another death in the central province of Isfahan.
The clashes between protesters and security forces mark a significant escalation in the unrest that has spread across the country since shopkeepers began protesting on Sunday over the government’s handling of a sharp currency slide and rapidly rising prices.
VIOLENCE REPORTED IN SEVERAL CITIES
Fars reported that two people had been killed in Lordegan in clashes between security services and what it called armed protesters. It earlier said several had died. Hengaw said several people had been killed and wounded there by security forces.
The Revolutionary Guards said one member of its affiliated Basij volunteer paramilitary unit had been killed in Kuhdasht and another 13 wounded, blaming demonstrators who it accused of taking advantage of the protests.
Hengaw said that the man, named by the Guards as Amirhossam Khodayari Fard, had been protesting and was killed by security forces.
Hengaw also reported that a protester was shot dead on Wednesday in Isfahan province in central Iran.
Reuters could not immediately verify any of those reports.
Protests also took place on Thursday in Marvdasht in the southern Fars province, the activist news site HRANA reported. Hengaw said demonstrators had been detained on Wednesday in the western provinces of Kermanshah, Khuzestan, and Hamedan.
CRITICAL MOMENT FOR CLERICAL RULERS
Iran’s clerical rulers are grappling with Western sanctions that have battered an economy already reeling from more than 40% inflation, compounded by Israeli and US airstrikes in June targeting the country’s nuclear and ballistic missile infrastructure and military leadership.
Tehran has responded to the protests with an offer of dialogue alongside its security response.
Government spokesperson Fatemeh Mohajerani said on Thursday that the authorities would hold a direct dialogue with representatives of trades unions and merchants, but without giving details.
The Basij is a volunteer paramilitary force loyal to Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. It is affiliated with the Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps, which on Thursday accused those involved in the unrest in Kuhdasht of “taking advantage of the atmosphere of popular protests.”
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN
Merchants, shop owners, and students in a number of Iranian universities have been demonstrating for days and closing major bazaars. The government shut down much of the country on Wednesday by declaring a holiday due to cold weather.
Authorities have in recent years quashed protests over issues ranging from high prices, droughts, women’s rights and political freedoms, often with tough security measures and extensive arrests.
Iran‘s economy has been struggling for years, chiefly because of US and Western sanctions over Tehran’s nuclear program, support for terrorism, and human rights abuses. Regional tensions led to a 12-day air war with Israel in June, further straining the country’s finances.
The Iranian rial lost around half its value against the dollar in 2025, with official inflation reaching 42.5% in December.
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Australia’s Jewish History Might Have Unfolded Differently
People attend the ‘Light Over Darkness’ vigil honoring victims and survivors of a deadly mass shooting during a Jewish Hanukkah celebration at Bondi Beach on Dec. 14, in Sydney, Australia, Dec. 21, 2025. Photo: REUTERS/Hollie Adams
The deadly pogrom that took place in Australia at a Hanukkah event on Bondi Beach was the culmination of more than two years of hate and violence directed at Jews following the October 7 Hamas terror attack on Israel.
Australian Jews have learned that what they once considered to be one of the safest and most comfortable places in the world to be a Jew, is anything but. Yet the Jewish experience in Australia might have been very different.
The idea of a Jewish refuge somewhere other than Israel predates the modern Zionist movement. In the 20th century, two possible havens for Jewish refugees were considered during the lead up to World War II; both were rejected.
The more widely known effort involved a proposal for a refuge in Alaska. It was the initiative of Harold Ickes, US Secretary of the Interior, who was concerned that Alaska’s sparse population (only 70,000) would make it a tempting target for attack. (This story is the historical basis for Michael Chabon’s 2007 novel The Yiddish Policemen’s Union.) The proposal received only lukewarm support from President Roosevelt and after three days of presentations to the US Senate Committee on Territories and Insular Affairs in May 1940, it died.
The second effort, less widely known, involved a proposed Jewish sanctuary in Australia, a possibility I learned about only recently when I was going through some Yiddish literature left by my parents.
I grew up in Montreal, the son of Yiddish-speaking Jewish immigrants from Eastern Europe.
For the first half of the 20th century, Montreal, the home of writers such as the poet J. I. Segal, was a major center of North American Yiddish culture. My parents would often mention Melech Ravitch, pen name for Zecharia-Chune Bergner, a well- known Yiddish poet and essayist, who was a leading figure in Montreal Yiddish circles.
I discovered that Ravitch, originally from Poland, spent several years during the 1930s in Australia, before ending up in Montreal. While there, he investigated the feasibility of establishing a haven for Jewish refugees in a sparsely inhabited region of northwestern Australia known as the Kimberley.
The proposal, backed by a European group, the Freeland League, would involve the purchase of land (a little over 10,000 square miles) in Western and Northern Australia. An advance contingent of 500 Jewish refugees from Europe would begin the process of creating a settlement, followed by 75,000 to 100,000 people to follow. Ravich envisioned an eventual population of one million, this at a time when the population of Australia as a whole was less than seven million.
The company that owned the land agreed to sell the desired tract, and leading religious and public figures, including the Premier of Western Australia, were in favor. But opposition at the federal level prevented the plan from moving forward. The League was informed that the Australian Government, led by Prime Minister John Curtin, was not in favor of “alien settlement in Australia.”
The Australian government was consistent. The Évian Conference, held in July 1938 at the French resort city of Évian les Bains, was initiated by President Roosevelt to find a solution to the plight of hundreds of thousands of stateless European Jews. Thirty-two nations, including Australia, participated. The conference achieved very little. The Australian chief delegate, Colonel T. W. White, declared “as we have no real racial problem, we are not desirous of importing one by encouraging any scheme of large-scale foreign migration.”
The Jews murdered in the Holocaust were doomed by worldwide indifference to their fate, but also by the fact that there was no independent Jewish state that could have served as a refuge when they needed one. That’s why Israel is needed now — and why an Australian refuge would have made such a huge difference nearly 100 years ago.
Jacob Sivak, a Fellow of the Royal Society of Canada, is a retired professor, University of Waterloo.