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7 ways to offer support and Jewish strength to friends or loved ones facing cancer
When Shoshana Polakoff, 40, received an unexpected breast cancer diagnosis three years ago, the mother of three young children needed extra support. Her friends, family and Jewish community in the Washington Heights neighborhood of Manhattan immediately stepped up.
They organized help with after-school childcare, packed school lunches for her kids and sent her little notes of encouragement while Polakoff endured trying cancer treatments.
“I felt pounds lighter and overwhelmed by the chesed that mobilized so quickly,” said Polakoff, using the Hebrew term for kindness. “And the practical help was such an incredible gift.”
Too often, however, friends and loved ones of cancer patients are at a loss for how to respond when someone close to them is diagnosed with cancer.
“Often they feel just as thrown into this new reality as the woman herself and are not sure what to do next,” said Adina Fleischmann, chief services officer for Sharsheret, the national Jewish breast cancer and ovarian cancer organization.
This is especially the case for young people who might never have had a family member or friend diagnosed with cancer before.
Fleischmann — whose organization offers extensive resources for cancer patients, ranging from emotional support, mental health counseling and education to financial subsidies for women and their families facing breast and ovarian cancer — has some guidance for what to say, how to reach out and what kind of help might be appropriate to provide in the face of a friend or family member’s cancer diagnosis.
It’s all about providing chizuk – Hebrew for strength – to the person facing cancer.
1. Establish the “Kvetching Order”
The “Kvetching Order,” based on a concept called the Ring Theory developed by clinical psychologist Susan Silk, dictates that those close to someone struggling with a cancer diagnosis offer only support to the cancer patient, and any kvetching about their own stress outward.
Thus, the person with cancer is at the center of a circle surrounded by a ring of her or his most intimate friends and loved ones. More distant concentric rings include other friends, acquaintances, more distant family and community members.
Colloquially known as “comfort in, dump out,” the Kvetching Order establishes a flow of support directed toward the person facing cancer.
2. Be clear and specific with offers of help
Support can look and feel different to different people facing cancer; each person’s needs and life circumstances are unique. When younger women are diagnosed with cancer — as often is the case with ovarian or breast cancers, where 50% of new diagnoses are in women under age 63 — patients often need extra help managing their responsibilities as parents and/or career professionals.
“Let the woman guide the journey,” Fleischmann says of the cancer patient. “Follow her lead.”
Sharsheret suggests offering concrete, practical assistance, such as offering to take the patient’s child to after-school activities or helping with homework. Maybe offer to come over to help clean the house, do laundry, or pick up groceries and make dinner for the family.
“But give the woman the feeling of control,” Fleischmann said. “Let her be in control of your support.”
Thus, a concrete suggestion like, “Can I bring you pizza for dinner on Wednesday?” is better than a vague offer of “What can I do to help?”
3. Check in often but don’t expect a response
By all means reach out to the person facing cancer. But if they don’t respond to your phone calls, emails or texts, don’t be put off.
“Sometimes the woman may not have the time or energy to respond,” Fleischmann said. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t continue reaching out. “She will appreciate knowing that you’re thinking of her.”
Polakoff found small gestures particularly meaningful.
“Little things meant a lot,” she said. “Like just a note that said, ‘I’m thinking of you. Have a good Shabbos.’”
4. Leave cancer out of it sometimes and just be with them
Kristen Harvey, who at 23 was faced with an ovarian cancer diagnosis for the second time, said it was important to have friends around her with whom she could talk about the future.
“Just being there was the best thing,” said Harvey, who recently graduated from college and lives in Michigan. “We didn’t need to do anything. I appreciated when people came over and we just hung out and watched a movie.”
Alexis Wilson, a teacher in Jupiter, Florida, said her friendships were essential during her breast cancer treatment. Before starting chemotherapy, her friends threw her a big party to which everyone showed up in different-colored wigs and decorated her yard with signs.
“My friends played a big role,” said Wilson, 39. “I felt like I wasn’t alone.”
5. Continue your support throughout someone’s cancer journey
For some women, “maintenance treatment” can last for many years beyond the active treatments of chemotherapy, radiation or surgery. Women living with metastatic breast cancer, for example, usually continue treatment throughout their lives.
Fleischmann recommends checking in with a woman along every step of her cancer journey: not just the period of active treatment, but also during maintenance treatment, survivorship, and if she is living with metastatic or advanced cancer.
“It’s nice to know my friends and family continued to reach out once I was done with treatment,” Harvey said. “Back to normal doesn’t mean life is ever normal.”
There are often heightened emotional needs around anniversaries of certain cancer diagnoses or treatment dates, Fleischmann said, so marking these dates could be important.
6. Make sure you have your own support system
If you’re particularly close to the person with cancer, you may experience feelings of being overwhelmed yourself. It’s important to take care of your own emotional well-being and not dismiss it in the face of someone else’s more pressing illness.
“As a caregiver, you can be very easily drained without your own coping mechanisms,” Fleischmann said.
Make sure to take care of yourself physically and emotionally so that you have the capacity to attend to your friend or loved one’s needs.
7. Talk to your healthcare provider and safeguard your own health
Even while supporting a loved one or friend with breast or ovarian cancer, it’s important to safeguard your own health.
The BRCA genetic mutation that causes breast cancer and ovarian cancer is much more common among Ashkenazi Jewish women than in the general U.S. population. About 1 in 40 Ashkenazi Jewish women and men carry the mutation, compared to 1 in 400 in the general population. Ashkenazi Jewish men are also at elevated risk for melanoma and prostate and pancreatic cancer.
“Talk to your healthcare provider,” Fleischmann said. “Those whose family members are facing hereditary breast and ovarian cancer should speak with their doctor or genetic counselor to see how this may affect them, too, and learn about appropriate testing and precautions.”
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Majority of New York City Jewish Voters Dissatisfied With Mamdani, Poll Shows
New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani holds a press conference at the New York City Office of Emergency Management, as a major winter storm spreads across a large swath of the United States, in Brooklyn, New York City, US, Jan. 25, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Bing Guan
A new poll of Jewish voters in New York City points to deep dissatisfaction with Mayor Zohran Mamdani’s leadership, particularly over his handling of rhetoric tied to the Israel-Hamas conflict.
The survey, conducted by Mercury Public Affairs in partnership with The Jewish Majority, sampled 665 Jewish voters who cast ballots in last year’s mayoral election between Feb. 17 and 28. Its findings suggest a growing disconnect between Mamdani and the local Jewish community, building upon an already tense and fraught relationship.
According to the newly released poll, 58 percent of respondents rated Mamdani’s job performance as “fair” or “poor,” including 40 percent who said it was “poor.” Just 32 percent said he was doing an “excellent” or “good” job. The numbers indicate that a clear majority of Jewish voters surveyed are dissatisfied with the direction of the city under the mayor’s leadership.
The survey also highlights sharp concern over Mamdani’s response to the phrase “globalize the intifada,” a slogan widely condemned by pro-Israel advocates as inciting violence against Jews. Sixty-one percent of respondents said the mayor’s refusal to explicitly denounce the phrase has “emboldened pro-Hamas protesters,” reflecting alarm among many Jewish voters about rising antisemitism and public safety.
For many in the community, the issue goes beyond rhetoric. Critics argue that failing to clearly reject language associated with violence risks normalizing extremism at a time when Jewish communities in the US and globally have reported increased threats. New York City has experienced an ongoing surge in antisemitic hate crimes in the two-and-a-half years since Hamas’s Oct. 7, 2023, massacre across southern Israel.
The “glogalize the intifada” slogan, which gained traction at pro-Palestinian protests worldwide amid the Israel–Hamas war in Gaza, has been criticized by many Jewish New Yorkers who associate it with calls for violence against Jewish and Israeli civilians. The term “intifada,” Arabic for “uprising,” is widely known from two bloody periods of sustained Palestinian terrorism against Israelis. Many observers have argued that calls to “globalize the intifada” encourage activists to take up political violence worldwide, especially against the Jewish community and supporters of Israel.
In June 2025, Mamdani defended the phrase by invoking the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising during World War II. In response, the US Holocaust Memorial Museum repudiated the then-mayoral candidate, calling his comments “outrageous and especially offensive to [Holocaust] survivors.”
Mamdani has also faced scrutiny over his handling of issues pertaining to antisemitism and the Jewish community. The Mamdani administration revoked the city’s adoption of the International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance (IHRA) definition of antisemitism when the mayor entered office, arguing that rigid definitions can risk conflating criticism of Israel with antisemitism and may complicate the handling of politically sensitive speech.
IHRA — an intergovernmental organization comprising dozens of countries including the US and Israel — adopted the “working definition” of antisemitism in 2016. Since then, the definition has been widely accepted by Jewish groups and lawmakers across the political spectrum, and it is now used by hundreds of governing institutions, including the US State Department, European Union, and United Nations. Law enforcement also uses it as a tool for matters such as hate-crime investigations and sentencing.
The mayor’s office has also voiced support for divestments from Israeli bonds. The suggestion has received substantial pushback from the city’s business community, noting that the bonds have been a safe, long-standing investment for city pension funds and that financial decisions must be separated from political pressure. City Comptroller Mark Levine recently touted the bonds’ decades-long record of repayment and argued his office’s responsibility was to maximize returns for retirees, not respond to shifting political campaigns.
The poll’s findings align with voting patterns from the most recent mayoral election, in which Mamdani struggled to win broad support among Jewish voters. He received 26 percent of the vote within the group, far behind his chief opponent, former Gov. Andrew Cuomo, who secured 55 percent. Republican candidate Curtis Sliwa received 8 percent.
Observers speculate the numbers could pose a longer-term challenge for Mamdani as he navigates a city with the world’s largest population outside of Israel.
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Molotov Cocktail Attacks Target Jewish Institutions in Argentina in Two Incidents Within a Week
A display in Buenos Aires of pictures and names of victims of the 1994 AMIA bombing, in which 85 people died and hundreds more were wounded. Photo: Reuters/Marcos Brindicci.
Argentine Jews are on edge after Jewish institutions in Buenos Aires were targeted in Molotov cocktail attacks in two separate incidents in less than a week, deepening security concerns within the local Jewish community.
On Sunday, unknown individuals threw a homemade firebomb at the Chabad Lubavitch Jewish Community Center in La Plata, a city in southeastern Buenos Aires, in a brazen attack marking the second within a week.
Local authorities reported no significant material damage or casualties, though the incident has fueled alarm over a broader pattern of violence targeting Jews across the country.
The Buenos Aires Security Ministry and Police Counterterrorism Division have opened an investigation into this latest incident, examining possible links to an attack last week that appears to share a similar modus operandi.
The Delegation of Argentine Israelite Associations (DAIA), the country’s Jewish umbrella organization, strongly condemned this second attack, warning of a disturbing pattern of incidents and calling for an urgent investigation and clear condemnation.
“Violence must be countered through education and by bringing those responsible to justice. When hatred goes unpunished, it escalates, and today it is once again surfacing in tangible acts that cannot be normalized,” DAIA said in a statement.
“There is no room for indifference. Antisemitism is not an isolated incident, it is a threat that demands a firm response, coordinated institutional action, and the strict enforcement of the law,” it continued.
NUEVO ATAQUE ANTISEMITA EN LA PLATA
Una vez másExpresamos nuestro más enérgico repudio frente a un nuevo ataque antisemita ocurrido en la ciudad de La Plata, esta vez contra la sede de Jabad Lubavitch.
Advertimos que la violencia debe ser combatida con educación y con el… pic.twitter.com/h1jrYg56hY
— DAIA (@DAIAArgentina) May 3, 2026
In an alarming earlier attack, the Israelite Literary Center and Max Nordau Library in La Plata was targeted Thursday when unidentified individuals threw a homemade Molotov-type device at the building’s entrance.
Although the device failed to ignite, it shattered the building’s windows and caused some material damage. Fortunately, no fires broke out and no injuries were reported.
The center condemned the attack, pointing to a “growing level of antisemitism nationally and internationally” and warning that such trends are contributing to a broader climate of hostility.
“We cannot separate this episode from the rise in antisemitism and the climate of intolerance that enables expressions of hatred. This compels us to promote, now more than ever, a democratic coexistence based on respect for pluralism,” the statement read.
“These acts do not intimidate us – they strengthen our conviction to continue building culture, critical thinking, and community,” it continued.
In response to these latest attacks, Jewish institutions across the country have strengthened preventive protocols and reinforced internal security and surveillance measures.
La Plata Mayor Julio Alak denounced the attack as an assault on democratic coexistence and pluralistic values, reiterating that the city will firmly uphold mutual respect and reject all forms of hatred.
The DAIA called on authorities to act swiftly, identify those responsible, and apply the full extent of the law, stressing the need for decisive action to prevent further incidents.
“Impunity cannot be an option. This is an expression of hatred that not only harms the Jewish community but also threatens the fundamental values of coexistence, respect, and democracy,” the organization said.
“Every act of antisemitism that goes unpunished sends a message of tolerance toward hatred. Every firm response from authorities is a clear signal that society is unwilling to back down,” it continued. “To ensure these incidents do not happen again, determination, action, and justice are required.”
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Israel Launches Mobile Climate Lab in Kenya to Improve Africa’s Data Collection for Environmental Policy
Israel’s Ambassador to Kenya, Gideon Behar, meets with Cabinet Secretary for Interior and National Security, Kipchumba Murkomen, on March 3, 2026. Photo: Screenshot
Israel’s Ambassador to Kenya has announced an initiative to deploy a mobile climate laboratory to grow data collection in the African nation, an effort to provide real-time information so policymakers can pursue solutions as temperatures continue to rise across the continent.
“There is a huge gap in climate data and climate knowledge in Africa, and the work of this laboratory helps us close this gap,” Gideon Behar said on Saturday while visiting the International Livestock Research Institute (ILRI) site in Kapiti, the current home of the mobile lab. He said that the plan would allow political leaders “to make better policy decisions based on real and accurate science.”
Israel’s Weizmann Institute of Science has spearheaded and operated the project. In December, the institute described the project’s importance, explaining that “Africa’s landscapes are transforming faster than almost anywhere else on earth, yet the continent remains one of the world’s largest blind spots in climate observations.”
The institute said that following a months-long journey around the African continent by sea, the “fully equipped Biosphere–Atmosphere Research Mobile Lab is about to roll onto African soil, launching an ambitious campaign to measure how land-use change is reshaping the region’s carbon, water, and energy cycles.”
ILRI’s Director General Appolinaire Djikeng described the importance of the project for not only Kenya but also the entire African continent.
“We are in a society where we need data to make decisions,” Djikeng said. “The pressure from the climate crisis requires precision. This facility allows us to generate the evidence needed to guide sustainable food production and environmental management.”
Academics leading the research team include Dan Yakir, professor in the Department of Earth and Planetary Sciences, staff scientist Eyal Rotenberg, and post-doctoral researcher Dan Elhanati. Rotenberg said that climate models in Africa today “are not well calibrated because there has been very little measurement. This initiative will provide the data needed to validate and improve those models.”
The mobile unit features more than 30 scientific instruments set to measure carbon exchanges, levels of solar radiation, water usage, and these factors’ impact on changes in vegetation. The lab’s ability to move enables much broader and more diverse data collection in a variety of ecosystems, according to the researchers.
“I’ve been working in this field for 25 years, studying vegetation – atmosphere interactions,” Rotenberg told Kenya’s Capital FM. “Not only how vegetation affects the atmosphere, but how the atmosphere affects vegetation.”
“That is my core motivation — to come to Africa,” he added. “Unlike in Europe, the United States, Japan or China, there is very little measurement here. But climate is global. We must understand it everywhere, especially in Africa.”
Behar — who also serves as Ambassador-Designated to Uganda, Tanzania, Malawi, and Seychelles and Permanent Representative of UNEP and UN HABITAT (UNON) — said “the measurements and scientific work being conducted here will serve the global fight against climate change.”
Rotenberg emphasized, “If vegetation uses most of the water, there is less available for human use … We need to understand that balance.”
The project plans to operate for three years before relocating to Mount Kenya and other regions. Weizmann then plans to expand to Tanzania, South Africa, and other countries.
According to the World Meteorological Organization (WMO) State of the Climate in Africa 2024 report, “extreme weather and climate change are intensifying hunger, insecurity, and displacement across Africa, impacting every facet of socio-economic development.” Depending on the data set, 2024 was either the warmest or second warmest year in Africa on record, and the previous decade was the warmest ever recorded.
WMO Secretary-General Celeste Saulo said the organization’s report “reveals a stark pattern of extreme weather events, with some countries grappling with exceptional flooding caused by excessive rainfall and others enduring persistent droughts and water scarcity.”
The effort in Kenya comes as Israel has expanded efforts in Africa to counter the impacts of climate change and the widespread droughts that have followed.
In February, officials and workers from Somaliland’s National Water Authority arrived in Israel for a course developed to train them on Israeli technology and techniques for water preservation and treatment. The trip came two months following Israel’s recognition of Somaliland, located in the Horn, as an independent, sovereign state.