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A first kiss, then marriage: Two rabbis-to-be tie the knot at a fun-filled California wedding
(JTA) — Zoe Dressner and Margeaux Wolberg had just one month free between graduating from college and when they were due in Jerusalem to begin rabbinical school. So, they figured, in addition to packing, finding an apartment and nailing down the logistics of a 6,000-mile move, why not get married?
At 23 and 22, respectively, the women are much younger than the average college-educated brides — but the decision to marry felt like a natural step in the relationship that began just months into college, accelerated because of the pandemic and, they knew, was headed for a shared destination in the rabbinate.
“The only questions left were do we go directly after college or take a year off, and which school do we apply to,” said Dressner. “Luckily, we both felt really attached to the Reform movement, which meant we were both set on attending Hebrew Union College. We’re lucky that it worked out.”
They had been together for less than a year when all colleges and universities in the United States shuttered their campuses because of the descending pandemic.
“We lived with my family and her family. We weren’t in college with our friends anymore,” Dressner said. “We figured that if this is working, then it must be legit, and it was.”
Their love story traversed three of Judaism’s denominations. Both women were first-year students in the joint program between Columbia University and List College, the undergraduate school of the Conservative movement’s Jewish Theological Seminary,when Dressner asked her classmates in an introductory Bible class whether anyone would like to check out a Reconstructionist Shabbat service. She got only one taker: Wolberg.
One feature of the wedding stood out: a bouncy house. “I need to be pushed out of my comfort zone,” Dressner said. (Courtesy)
The next morning, on a cold January day, they walked from Morningside Heights to the Society for the Advancement of Judaism, commonly known as SAJ, a Reconstructionist synagogue about two miles south of the JTS campus, and back. As they chatted, they learned they had something in common that was relatively rare for students at List College: Their Jewish passion had been stoked in the Reform movement, through their synagogues and the NFTY youth group — Wolberg in San Francisco and Dressner in East Brunswick, New Jersey.
Three months after their Shabbat morning stroll, the two women opened up to each other that their new friendship was turning into something more.
Neither had ever dated another woman. In fact, Dressner was the first person Wolberg ever dated at all.
“She was my first kiss,” Wolberg said. “And now we’re married.”
Once they planned to wed, they decided it would mostly fall on Wolberg to plan the wedding, while Dressner would plan the proposal. Back in New York, on Dec. 23, 2021, Dressner’s itinerary took them from a light show at the Brooklyn Botanical Garden to sipping warm cider on a rooftop bar to dinner at a kosher steakhouse. They also exchanged rings.
“We started the day by walking around Morningside Heights and recalling special memories together: dates, places we’d lived, etc.” Wolberg said. “I wasn’t surprised that we were getting engaged that day, but the whole day’s plan was a surprise.”
Their wedding similarly packed a lot into a short time. After heading to Calfornia from New York, they had a five-day window in which to marry before leaving for Israel. They set their sights on Sunday, June 12, but their preferred venue could accommodate them only on June 10, the Friday before.
The pair married amid the redwood trees at Old Mill Park in Marin County, holding a daytime reception that reflected a slew of their passions: Mediterranean food, progressive politics (informational posters about same-sex marriage and gun control) and Tevas, the outdoor sandals that both nature enthusiasts have long favored.
Dressner and Wolberg married amid the redwood trees at Old Mill Park in Marin County, California. (Hellena Cedeño Photography)
Then the couple headed to Kabbalat Shabbat services at San Francisco’s Congregation Emanu-El. (Beth Singer, Emanu-El’s rabbi, had performed their wedding ceremony after another rabbi and cantor had to cancel.) A catered dinner followed, at which their grandparents and siblings recited the sheva brachot, the blessings said during the first week of a marriage. They went back Saturday morning for services, then headed to Wolberg’s parents’ house for a family lunch. That night, they held a party for their friends.
The couple said they appreciated that Shabbat services became a continuation of their celebration. They also said that one feature of the wedding stood out: the bouncy house.
That was Dressner’s idea. Given their ages, she said, she thought, “Why not?”
But although some of their parents were initially skeptical about it, most of the guests partook. And one could also see the massive inflatable slide that the couple zoomed down together as a metaphor for their relationship.
“I’m much more reserved personality-wise, and sometimes I need to be pushed out of my comfort zone,” Dressner said. “I learn a lot from the wonderful way Margeaux approaches the world so differently.”
Meanwhile, Wolberg said that among the traits she loves most about her partner is that she has long considered herself a bit of an eccentric (her love of Renaissance music was part of what endeared her to Dressner), and thought it might be difficult to find someone who would put up with her many quirks.
“Zoe wholeheartedly accepts me,” she said. “My quirks are the things she loves the most. She’s not just putting up with me, but really loves all of me for exactly who I am.”
This story is part of JTA’s Mazels series, which profiles unique and noteworthy Jewish life events from births to b’nai mitzvah to weddings and everything in between.
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The post A first kiss, then marriage: Two rabbis-to-be tie the knot at a fun-filled California wedding appeared first on Jewish Telegraphic Agency.
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The secret Jewish history of Dolly Parton
Dolly Parton, the musician, actor and philanthropist died Aug. 25 at the age of 80. A Christian known for her Christmas output, she nonetheless connected to Judaism through a cause dear to her heart: literacy.
In a “By the Book” interview, Dolly Parton told The New York Times that a copy of the Bible is always on her nightstand, next to a “daily devotional book.” In her memoir “Songteller,” Parton explains, “I’m not that religious, but I’m very, very spiritual. I grew up in very religious surroundings. I grew up with a Bible background, and I’m glad I did.”
Parton’s knowledge of the Jewish Bible is evident in several of her most beloved songs, including “Coat of Many Colors” and “The Master’s Hand.” The song “Coat of Many Colors” is based on Parton’s own childhood growing up in relative poverty and draws upon the story of the biblical Joseph. Parton sings, “As she [her mother] sewed, she told a story from the Bible she had read / About a coat of many colors Joseph wore….”
In “Songteller,” Parton recounts, “My mom made me this little coat. In order to make me proud of that little coat, I know now, she told me the story about Joseph from the Bible and his coat of many colors. So I thought, ‘Well, if it’s from the Bible, and Joseph was an important person, it has to be very special and important.’ Then when I went to school, the kids did not see that. They just made fun of my little coat. I had seen so much more in that coat than what Mama had sewn, things sewn into my body, my soul, my everything. Mama had made it and told the story and made it all seem so real. It was so mind-warping and heart-shattering to me when they made fun of it. In my mind, I thought I looked just like Joseph. But the kids didn’t, and it crushed me.”
Her song “The Master’s Hand,” written in 1971, displays Parton’s deep immersion not only in the Five Books of Moses but also in the Writings — specifically, the Book of Daniel. The song begins by recounting the familiar story of Noah thusly:
In the days before the flood
The world grew wicked and corrupt.
But Noah was a good man,
And the Lord unto him came.
And He said to Noah, “Go build an ark.”
Noah did, and the sky got dark,
And a great flood destroyed everything.
Except for Noah and his wife
And their three sons and their wives
And a pair of every kind of creature
Walkin’ in the land.
And the people mocked.
And they made fun.
But ol’ Noah worked ’til it was done,
’Cause he was holding to the Master’s hand.
After the song’s refrain, it continues with the lesser-known story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, three figures from the Book of Daniel. The three are thrown into a “fiery furnace” after refusing to bow down to an image of Nebuchadnezzar II, the king of Babylon. Rewarded for their loyalty to God, the three miraculously survive the fire. Or, as Dolly Parton puts it:
Three Hebrew children in days of old
Were marched into the fiery coals,
’Cause they would not deny the Lord,
Would not obey command.
And the furnace roared like a mighty storm,
But the Hebrew children saw no harm.
The flame was smothered by the Master’s hand….
Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego
Had no fear of the fiery coals,
’Cause they were holdin’ to the Master’s hand.
“I know my Bible stories, like the ones I mention in this song,” Parton writes in “Songteller.”
Parton’s charity, the Imagination Library, a program with free books for children was the inspiration for Harold Grinspoon’s PJ Library, which provides Jewish-themed books to young readers.
“I’m always honored when my Imagination Library inspires others,” Parton said.
While Dolly Parton’s musical roots are in country and gospel, by the mid-1970s, with her career at a standstill, she was ready to reach a larger audience. Two Brooklyn-born Jewish men played essential roles in helping Parton make the leap from Nashville to mainstream pop stardom. Parton gives full credit to Sandy Gallin, one of the most successful talent agents from the 1970s through the 1990s, for helping her to achieve “crossover” success in music and to expand into TV, movies and even a theme park.
In 1977, Gallin convinced Parton to record a song called “Here You Come Again,” written by the Jewish husband-and-wife songwriting duo Barry Mann and Cynthia Weil. He brought in another Brooklyn native, Gary Klein, to produce the song and the album of the same name. The single cracked the Top 20 Pop Album charts and spawned her first Top 10 pop hit; the album was her first to sell millions. (Incidentally, her pop success didn’t come at the cost of her country credibility; the song sat atop the Country Singles chart for five weeks.) The song also garnered Parton her first-ever Grammy Award, for best female country vocal. Over the next few years, Klein produced a number of other hits for Parton.
But for Gallin, it didn’t end there. He convinced Parton to open the “Dollywood” theme park in Tennessee, and the two co-founded a production company, Sandollar, among whose many successes were the Steve Martin film “Father of the Bride” and the hit TV series “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.” The producers won an Academy Award in 1990 for their AIDS documentary, “Common Threads: Stories from the Quilt.” Gallin also produced the Parton-starring movies “Rhinestone” and “Straight Talk.” Parton commemorated her friendship and loyalty to Gallin by writing “Sandy’s Song,” sung to the tune of “Greensleeves.”
In “Songteller,” Dolly Parton writes of Gallin, “We were so close and our relationship was so loving. We were from two completely different worlds, but we just clicked, somehow. He was just one of those friends that you find who you just know are going to be your friend forever.” For a time, the two even shared an apartment on Manhattan’s Upper East Side. After Gallin died in 2017, Parton told an interviewer, “Nobody could quite get how the Christian Southern girl and the New York Jewish boy could have so much in common. But it was real.”
PJ Grisar contributed to this article.
The post The secret Jewish history of Dolly Parton appeared first on The Forward.
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A tourist’s guide to the vanished Jewish quarter of Warsaw
פֿאַרן חורבן האָבן אין וואַרשע געוווינט אַן ערך 370 טויזנט ייִדן — די גרעסטע ייִדישע שטאָט אין אייראָפּע און די צווייט גרעסטע בכלל נאָך ניו-יאָרק.
נאָך דער מלחמה איז די שטאָט און אירע ייִדישע אײַנוווינער, ווי באַוווּסט, געוואָרן איין גרויסע חורבֿה. דאָס גאַנצע רײַכע ייִדישע לעבן איז געוואָרן שטויב און אַש. אָבער אַ דאַנק די דיגיטאַלישע אַרכיוון, קען דאָס אַמאָליקע ייִדישע לעבן אין וואַרשע ווײַטער עקזיסטירן אין דעם מענטשלעכן דמיון, און מע קען עס ווידער אויפֿלעבן אין אונדזער תּקופֿה. אַ מענטש קען זיך פֿאַרטיפֿן אין די אַמאָליקע וואַרשעווער ייִדישע צײַטונגען, זיך פֿאַרלירן אין דער רײַזע אויף דער צײַטמאַשינקע, און זיך פֿאָרשטעלן אַז מע געפֿינט זיך אין וואַרשע אין 1938.
דאָס איז פֿאַקטיש דער רושם וואָס בלײַבט נאָכן דורכבלעטערן בני מערס נײַ בוך אויף העברעיִש, „מורה דרך: ורשה היהודית 1938“ (אַ וועגווײַזער צו דער ייִדישער וואַרשע, 1938), אַרויס אין 2025 בײַם מאגנס-פֿאַרלאַג. דער געדאַנק הינטער דעם בוך איז גאָר אייגנאַרטיק און אומגעוויינטלעך: צו שרײַבן אַ בוך הײַנט צו טאָג וואָס איז צונויפֿגעשטעלט ווי אַ בוך פֿאַר טוריסטן וועלכע ווילן באַזוכן דעם ייִדישן ייִשובֿ אין וואַרשע אין 1938; און דער „מחבר“ פֿונעם וועגווײַזער איז אַ וואַרשעווער ייִד פֿון יענע יאָרן, וואָס ווענדט זיך צו די דעמאָלטדיקע לייענערס.
בעצם איז דאָס גאַנצע בוך אַ שפּיל פֿון „לאָמיר זיך פֿאָרשטעלן“: אַ געשיכטע-בוך וואָס מאַכט זיך פֿאַר אַ טוריסטיש בוך, וואָס גיט פּרטים וועלכע זענען דעם הײַנטיקן לייענער דווקא אומניצלעך. דאָס שטייט אין שאַרפֿער סתּירה מיטן עצם געדאַנק פֿון אַ טוריסטיק בוך וואָס זײַן ציל איז צו געבן ניצלעכע פּרטים וועגן אַ געוויס אָרט. ווי מער שרײַבט אין דער הקדמה: „כּמעט אַלץ וואָס וועט ווײַטער געשילדערט ווערן אין אָט דעם וועגווײַזער עקזיסטירט ניט הײַנט… דאָס שרײַבן פֿון אַזאַ מין וועגווײַזער איז אויף אַ גרויסן מאָס דערמעגלעכט געוואָרן אַ דאַנק דער וועבזײַט ׳עיתּונות יהודית היסטורית׳ [דער היסטאָרישער ייִדישער פּרעסע].“
ווי יעדער וועגווײַזער פֿון דעם זשאַנער, איז דאָס בוך צעטיילט אויף דרײַ קאַטעגאָריעס: אַלגעמיינע קענטשאַפֿט, ניצלעכע אינפֿאָרמאַציע און די טורן. אויף דער ערשטער קאַטעגאָריע, „אַלגעמיינע קענטשאַפֿט“, קען מען לייענען וועגן דער שטאָטס געשיכטע, איר באַפֿעלקערונג, אירע לשונות, רעליגיע, ווירטשאַפֿט, קולטור, ספּאָרט, אַרכיטעקטור, חיות און פֿלאַנצן. למשל, ניט געקוקט אויף אַלע פּאָליטישע, רעליגיעזע און קולטורעלע מחלוקתן צווישן די וואַרשעווער ייִדן, האָבן זיי כאָטש איין זאַך געהאַט בשותּפֿות: די ייִדישע שפּראַך. ווי עס שטייט אינעם וועגווײַזער, רעדט מען אין דער ייִדישער וואַרשע בעיקר ייִדיש, ווי 88.9% פֿון די ייִדישע אײַנוווינער האָבן אין 1931 דעקלאַרירט. און זיי רעדן זייער אייגענעם ייִדישן דיאַלעקט מיט זײַנע אייגענע טערמינען. אַ באַלעבאָס, צום בײַשפּיל, הייסט אַ „וואַרעט“; אַ פֿינצטערער קאָרידאָר איז אַ „שטשאָנקע“; בכּיוון איז „אינאַמישנע“.
אויף דער קאַטעגאָריע „ניצלעכע אינפֿאָרמאַציע“ אינפֿאָרמירט דער וועגווײַזער דעם לייענער אין וועלכער צײַט פֿון יאָר איז ייִדן כּדאי צו באַזוכן וואַרשע (דער ענטפֿער: פֿרילינג און האַרבסט, ווען מע פֿײַערט דעם „חודש פֿון ייִדיש בוך“). צווישן די אַנדערע שאלות: וווּ אײַנצושטיין; וואָס צו עסן און טרינקען, פֿון אייער קיכלעך ביז וואַסער־פּלעצלעךף וויפֿל קאָסטן פֿאַרשידענע זאַכן? (אַ ייִדישע צײַטונג למשל קאָסט צווישן 10 און 30 גראָשן; אַ קילאָ קעז — 1 זלאָטע); וואָס צו לייענען אויפֿן וועג? פֿון וואָס מע זאָל זיך אָפּהיטן? (פֿון די גנבֿים, פֿאַרשטייט זיך) און ווי אַזוי מע קען אָנקומען קיין וואַרשע. מע לייענט אויך וועגן דעם פֿאַרקער אויפֿן וועג, דער פּאָסט, די בענק, דער פּאָליציי, די פֿײַערלעשערס, די ביבליאָטעקן, און נאָך און נאָך.
אויף דער טורן-סעקציע לייגט דער מחבר פֿאָר זיבן מעגלעכע טורן, למשל: אַ טור פֿונעם פּלאַץ גזשיבאָווסקי דורך דער קראָכמאַלנער גאַס – דער צענטער פֿון „דאָס פּלעצל“ (דער ייִדישער אונטערוועלט), פֿון וואַנען עס שטאַמען די דרײַ מחברים פֿון דער זעלבער משפּחה, י. י. זינגער, יצחק באַשעוויס זינגער און אסתּר קרײַטמאַן, און וווּ עס געפֿינט זיך אויך דער באַרימטער סאַסקי-גאָרטן; אַ טור וואָס דערפֿירט דיך דורך דער באַרימטסטער ייִדישער גאַס נאַלעווקעס, דער האַרץ פֿון ייִדישער וואַרשע, וווּ מחמת דער בליִענדיקער עקאָנאָמיע שפּראָצן דאָרט אויף יעדן שריט און טריט נײַע קיאָסקן פֿון זעלצער און אײַזקרעם; אָדער אַ שפּאַציר וואָס גייט דורכן צפֿונדיקן טייל שטאָט, אַרײַנגערעכנט דורך דער אָרעמער סמאָטשע־גאַס, וואָס ניט געקוקט אויף דעם דלות פֿאַרמאָגט זי דעם שיינעם „מעטראָ-קינאָזאַל“. בני מער האָט אַגבֿ מיט 8 יאָר צוריק טאַקע געשריבן אַ גאַנץ בוך וועגן דער סמאָטשע־גאַס (מאגנס, 2018).
„אַ וועגווײַזער צו דער ייִדישער וואַרשע, 1938“ איז אַ וויכטיקער בײַטראָג צום זשאַנער פֿון פּאָפּולערער געשיכטע, וואָס באַנײַט און באַלעבט די אַמאָליקע שטאָט דורך זײַן אויסנעמיקן פֿאָרמאַט. דער העברעיִשער לייענער וועט געניסן פֿון מערס ברייטער קענטשאַפֿט, הומאָר און טאַלאַנט ווי אַ דערציילער. ס׳איז פֿאָרט אומפֿאַרמײַדלעך, אַז בשעתן לייענען פֿילט מען זיך ווי מע דרייט זיך אַרום אין דער וועלט פֿון שדים און ווי מע ווערט געפֿירט דורך אַ „טויטער שטאָט“. דאָס בוך פּאַסט צום בעסטן פֿאַר די לייענערס וואָס זענען מסוגל אַ ווײַלע „צו סוספּינדירן דעם ספֿק“ און זיך איבערגעבן דער פֿאַנטאַזיע.
נאָכן איבערלייענען דאָס בוך, שטעל איך זיך אַליין די קשיא: וואָס פֿאַר אַ ווירטועלע פֿאַנטאַזיע אין דרײַ דימענסיעס וואָלט די אַלמעכטיקע קינסטלעכע אינטעליגענץ געקאָנט שאַפֿן פֿון מערס בוך? אויף אַזאַ סאָרט אויפֿלעבונג דאַרף מען נאָך וואַרטן.
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Can an Oklahoma Senate candidate attract voters with an ad tossing out AIPAC ‘trash’?
(JTA) —Oklahoma grassroots activist N’kiyla Jasmine Thomas is facing off on Tuesday against centrist Jim Priest in a Democratic Senate race that has become the latest litmus test for progressive politics in a conservative stronghold.
The two candidates are battling at the ballot box for the second time this summer after neither of them secured the needed majority to win the June primary contest. Thomas, a nurse who has been vocal against AIPAC, earned 45% of votes in the June five-person matchup, while Priest, a lawyer and ordained minister, accrued 24%.
Both Thomas and Priest would be underdogs in the general election against Republican candidate Rep. Kevin Hern, who swept his primary and clinched the endorsement of President Donald Trump. Oklahoma hasn’t sent a Democrat to the Senate in more than three decades.
Nonetheless, Tuesday’s runoff will serve as a referendum on the potency of progressivism in a deep-red state, just a week after democratic socialist Angie Nixon knocked out her moderate opponent in Florida’s Democratic Senate primary.
Unlike Nixon, Thomas is not a member of the Democratic Socialists of America. She has, however, openly identified with socialist policies, while her opponent, Priest, calls himself a moderate.
Neither candidate has a wealth of political experience. Priest, 70, made a failed bid for Oklahoma attorney general in 2010 and was previously the CEO of two nonprofit organizations. His campaign priorities center on reducing the cost of living, making healthcare more accessible and inspiring confidence in government.
Thomas, meanwhile, is a 31-year-old citizen of the Chickasaw Nation, who says she represents “the next generation of leaders.” Among her key focuses are women’s health and safety, civil rights and LGBTQIA+ protections. She has also repeatedly pledged to never take money from the American Israel Public Affairs Committee.
Although the pro-Israel lobby has not been involved in this race, a November social media reel showed Thomas pulling a giant red trash bin, adorned with the labels “AIPAC Funds” and “Corporate PAC Funds.” Alongside the reel is a caption that reads, “Just taking out the trash.”
“I am a sole grassroots candidate,” she said in the reel. “And we are not accepting AIPAC or corporate PAC funds. It’s garbage.”
Asked about her rhetoric on AIPAC, Thomas told the Jewish Telegraphic Agency that “My concerns have NEVER been about Jewish people, Judaism, or Israel’s existence,” saying that she instead prioritizes human rights, civilian lives and the accountability of all governments.
Some voters see it differently. David Howman, a 30-year-old Jewish banker in Tulsa, said that although he’s “a fairly progressive Democratic voter,” he considers Thomas’s usage of AIPAC to be “a pretty cheap political tactic.”
“It’s kind of like a little grenade you get to toss out in there,” Howman told JTA.
“If AIPAC were funneling a bunch of money into the Jim Priest campaign, maybe that’s a conversation that is worth having,” he added. “But they’re not even touching this race.”
Though Howman voted for Priest in Tuesday’s runoff, he noted that a different candidate, Troy Green, was his favorite in the June primary.
When asked at a Saturday debate about Israel’s military actions, both candidates confirmed their belief in the existence of a “genocide” in Gaza. Only Priest, however, linked the word to Israel, while Thomas connected it to the actions of Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.
Priest recognized that Hamas “committed atrocities,” noting that “they kidnapped people, they killed people, they tortured people” and that “they should be held accountable.” But he also deemed Israel’s retaliation “disproportionate to the threat.”
“In response, Israel is committing genocide,” he said, accusing the Jewish state of preventing medical supplies and food from getting to people.
Expressing skepticism about both one-state and two-state solutions, Priest declared that “what’s needed is a 24-state solution,” in which the whole Middle East unites “in something like the Abraham Accords.”
The Priest campaign did not respond to JTA’s request for comment.
Thomas, meanwhile, emphasized that “we can be for our Jewish brothers and sisters, and we can be against Netanyahu and what he is doing.”
“He is committing genocide. He is absolutely murdering children,” Thomas said. “We have to stop providing funding for these wars.”
She also backed the International Criminal Court’s decision to issue arrest warrants for Israeli leaders, noting that the U.S. should “not be on the side of another country that we don’t even have any ties to, outside of allyship.”
Thomas had previously refrained from using the word genocide in public statements, instead expressing “solidarity with Palestine” and calling for an end to “unconditional funding of Israel’s military.”
In her response to JTA’s request that she clarify her stances on AIPAC and Israel, Thomas provided a lengthy written statement.
“I stand with my Jewish brothers and sisters against antisemitism, hate and discrimination in all forms,” she said, referring to Judaism as one of the “most enduring faith traditions.”
Reiterating remarks she made at the debate, Thomas noted that “two things can be true at the same time,” and advocated for both the security of the Jewish people and a willingness to criticize “any government, including the current leadership of Israel.”
Thomas also voiced support for a two-state solution, explaining that “both Israelis and Palestinians deserve the opportunity to live in peace, security and self-determination.”
“When I discuss political influence or organizations, my focus is on the broader role of money, lobbying, and special interests in our political system, not on any one religion or community,” she added.
Regardless of who comes out victorious on Tuesday, Howman said that many Democrats will be heading to the ballot box this November with a pessimistic outlook.
“That’s kind of the challenge that we have here in Oklahoma,” he added. “There’s definitely a sense of defeatism on the Democratic side.”
This article originally appeared on JTA.org.
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