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In ‘Jewish Matchmaking,’ a diverse set of Jews experience Orthodox dating practices
(JTA) — According to Jewish lore, God has been making matches since the creation of the world. Aleeza Ben Shalom has been at it only since 2007 — but the Jewish matchmaker is about to bring what she calls “the most important job in the world” to the masses.
As the host of “Jewish Matchmaking” on Netflix, Ben Shalom adapts the model of Orthodox arranged matches to Jewish singles from a variety of religious and cultural backgrounds, including secular, Reform and Conservative Jews from across the United States and Israel.
Formal matchmaking, known as shidduch dating and considered de rigueur in haredi Orthodox circles, has been depicted as oppressive and constricting on Netflix dramas such as “Shtisel” and “Unorthodox.” But Ben Shalom believes her basic approach to love and marriage makes sense for a wide array of people — and she’s out to prove it.
“I’m hoping that people will see that matchmaking and Judaism is not just something that’s old, but that’s timeless, that’s relevant,” Ben Shalom told the Jewish Telegraphic Agency.
“We can use this beautiful, ancient tradition of matchmaking and bring it to modern life, and help people to find love from any age, stage, any background. It doesn’t matter. It’s universal,” she said. “The wisdom that I share is from Judaism. It’s based in Torah, but it’s for the world. Anybody of any background, of any culture can watch this, can learn something from it and can implement it in their lives.”
Ben Shalom isn’t the first to make the case that matchmaking services can help a wide array of Jews find lasting love. Ventures such as YentaNet, a pluralistic matchmaking service that arose about a decade ago, and Tribe 12, a Jewish nonprofit working with young adults in Philadelphia where Ben Shalom got her start, have sought to pair Jewish singles who might be a good fit for each other.
But the practice is most common in haredi Orthodox communities, where the norms around shidduch dating are well known and closely followed. Daters have a “shidduch resume” outlining their education, interests and family background; parents are involved in the process; and dating is intended to move quickly toward marriage. Dates typically take place in public spaces and couples are expected not to touch until they are married.
In formal Orthodox matchmaking, the shadchan, or matchmaker, is usually compensated by the parents, receiving around $1,000 upon a couple’s engagement, although higher-end services may charge more. Some matchmakers may charge a smaller amount for the initial meeting with a client, while Ben Shalom’s company, Marriage Minded Mentor, charges $50 to $100 an hour on a sliding scale based on the client’s salary. (Sima Taparia, the star and host of “Indian Matchmaking,” the Netflix show that inspired “Jewish Matchmaking,” reportedly charges her clients around $1,330 to $8,000 for similar services.)
Matchmakers keep records of who in their communities is looking for a match, but they can also tap into networks of other matchmakers and databases of singles as they seek to pair their clients. “We don’t believe in competition, we believe in collaboration,” said Ben Shalom, who is currently based in Israel.
Ben Shalom grew up in a Conservative Jewish community where matchmaking was not the norm, and later became Orthodox. She knew her husband for three weeks before becoming engaged, then touched him for the first time during their wedding four months later.
She knows that most participants on “Jewish Matchmaking” are unlikely to follow those same restrictions. Still, she encourages them to at least try.
“I’m really trying to have you guys touch hearts,” Ben Shalom tells Harmonie Krieger, a marketing and brand consultant in her 40s, as she explains why she wants Krieger to abstain from physical contact for five dates. “You will gain clarity. If there’s no physical glue holding the relationship together, then there’s actually value-based glue that’s holding the relationship together.”
“I will accept the challenge,” Krieger says. “Maybe. Let’s see how it goes.”
Harmonie Krieger, one of the clients and cast members of the show, is challenged not to touch her dates for their first five dates. (Netflix)
Krieger is one of a number of non-Orthodox Jews who opted to be cast on “Jewish Matchmaking” after being unsatisfied with their own dating efforts. There’s Nakysha Osadchey, a Black Reform Jew who is desperate to get out of Kansas City, Missouri, where she hasn’t had luck finding a partner who understands her multicultural background. Living in Tel Aviv via Rome, Noah Del Monte, 24, is the youngest of the group, an Israeli army veteran and diplomat’s son who wants to transition from so-called “king of nightlife” to husband. In Los Angeles, Ori Basly, who works for his family’s wedding planning business, is looking for a blue-eyed, blonde-haired Israeli woman to fall in love with and bring home to his family.
The Jews cast on the show are all in different places in their lives, some grieving serious breakups or committed to specific religious identities, some picky about looks or hoping their partner will be OK with riding motorcycles. Some of them are looking for particular Jewish commitments to concepts such as tikkun olam, which means “repairing the world” and has come to represent a social justice imperative for many liberal Jews; others want to be sure they’re matched only with people who share their approaches to observing Shabbat and keeping kosher.
Nakysha Osadchey from Kansas City, Missouri is looking for someone who understands her multicultural background as a Black Reform Jew. (Netflix)
Pamela Rae Schuller, a comedian whose material frequently centers on living with Tourette syndrome, a nervous system disorder, demurred when Ben Shalom first offered to set her up about seven years ago, after attending one of Schuller’s shows in Los Angeles.
“I was picking career first. And there are a lot of complicated feelings around dating and disability,” said Schuller, who stands 4 feet 6 inches tall and frequently barks because of her syndrome. “And I never even thought about a matchmaker.”
But in 2022, Ben Shalom reached out again, this time with a possible match, and a catch — it would be for a new Netflix show she was set to host. This time, Schuller was ready.
“I have this life that I really, really love. I’m just at the point where I’ve realized I’d like someone to start to share that with,” she said. “I’m not going into this looking for anyone to complete me.”
Pamela Rae Schuller, a comedian whose material frequently deals with living with a disability, makes an appearance on “Jewish Matchmaking”. (Courtesy Pamela Rae Schuller)
Getting back into dating and then appearing on the show, which Schuller hasn’t seen yet, was both scary and exciting, she says
“I’m about to put myself out there. I think that’s scary for everyone, disability or otherwise,” Schuller said. “But I also want to see a world where we remember that every type of person dates.”
Plus, she added, “I love the idea that Netflix is willing to show diversity in Judaism, diversity in dating.”
Ensuring that she show accurately represented American Jews was the responsibility of Ronit Polin-Tarshish, an Orthodox filmmaker who worked as a consulting producer on “Jewish Matchmaking.” Her role was to ensure that Judaism was portrayed authentically. She also worked to help the Orthodox cast members feel more comfortable with their involvement on the show.
“Being Orthodox is who I am, and of course it infused every part of my work,” said Polin-Tarshish, who herself used a matchmaker to find her husband.
Multiple recent depictions of Orthodox Judaism in pop culture — including the Netflix reality show “My Unorthodox Life” — have drawn criticism from Orthodox voices for getting details of Orthodox observance wrong or seeming to encourage people to leave Orthodoxy. Both “My Unorthodox Life” and “Unorthodox,” based on the Deborah Feldman memoir of the same name, depict formerly Orthodox women who left arranged marriages they described as oppressive.
Meanwhile, other depictions of Jews have been panned for botching details. Those include a grieving widow (herself not Jewish, but mourning a Jewish husband) serving hamantaschen at the shiva in the 2014 film “This is Where I Leave You,” and a storyline on the Canadian show “Nurses” about an Orthodox man rejecting a bone graft from a non-Jew.
“So many times we watch shows as Jews and we kind of gnash our teeth, and are like, ‘They got it wrong! They got a basic thing wrong!’” said Polin-Tarshish, who previously produced the first-ever feature-length film by Orthodox women and worked on another reality show about arranged marriages across cultures. “That was my whole job, to make sure that they got it right. And thank God, baruch Hashem, I think we really did.”
Asked if her involvement on “Jewish Matchmaking” has received any pushback, Ben Shalom said she had gotten questions about how she could know whether the showrunners will accurately represent who she is.
Ben Shalom said she was confident in the production based on what she saw on “Indian Matchmaking,” but also because she believed she could pull off the delicate balance needed to represent her own community and make for great entertainment.
“You have to be smart about how you share who you are with the world, and you have to be authentic, and you have to be real, and you have to be true,” she said. “And you have to do that on reality TV with strangers that you’ve just met, and you have to do an interview. So only because I saw it done beautifully before, I knew that I had the ability to do that as well.”
Polin-Tarshish is excited for viewers at home to identify with the cast of “Jewish Matchmaking,” and to even get frustrated by some of the cast members’ actions. But most importantly, she says she is excited to have real, three-dimensional Jewish characters on screen.
“They’re real people in every sense of the word,” Polin-Tarshish said. “There are characters you’re going to love, there are characters you might even love to hate. But that’s life.”
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Syria Tightens Grip After Kurdish Pullback, Says Islamic State Prisoners Escape
Military members gather near Raqqa prison, where the Syrian army is besieging SDF members after the army took control of the city of Raqqa, Syria, Jan. 19, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Mahmoud Hassano
Syrian government troops tightened their grip on Monday across a swathe of northern and eastern territory after it was abruptly abandoned by Kurdish forces in a dramatic shift that has consolidated President Ahmed al-Sharaa’s rule.
A day after the Kurdish-led Syrian Democratic Forces (SDF), once the main US ally in Syria, agreed to quit large areas under a ceasefire, the Syrian army said “a number of” Islamic State terrorists had escaped a prison that had been under SDF control in the eastern city of Shaddadi, accusing the SDF of releasing them.
The SDF said it had lost control of the prison following an attack by government fighters. The Syrian army denied attacking the jail and said its forces would work to secure the prison and re-arrest the escapees.
The SDF said Shaddadi prison had held thousands of militants. The army did not say how many IS detainees had fled.
The SDF withdrawals mark the biggest change in Syria‘s control map since Islamist fighters led by Sharaa toppled President Bashar al-Assad in 2024, tilting the power balance Sharaa’s way after months of deadlock in talks with the SDF over government demands its forces merge fully with Damascus.
After days of fighting with government forces, the SDF agreed on Sunday to withdraw from both Raqqa and Deir al-Zor – two Arab-majority provinces they had controlled for years and the location of Syria‘s main oil fields.
GOVERNMENT TROOPS DEPLOY AT OILFIELD, IN RAQQA
Turkey, which has repeatedly sent forces into northern Syria to curb Kurdish power since 2016, welcomed the deal signed by its ally Sharaa and SDF commander Mazloum Abdi. Turkish President Tayyip Erdogan urged the swift implementation of the agreement that requires the full integration of Kurdish fighters into Syria‘s armed forces.
The SDF, spearheaded by the Kurdish YPG militia, had established control of a quarter or more of Syria during the 2011-2024 civil war, whilst fighting with the support of US troops against Islamic State. The United States, which has since established close ties with Sharaa under President Donald Trump, has been closely involved in mediation between the sides.
The SDF media office said in a statement that the prison at Shaddadi – one of three under its control in the Hasakah region – had come under repeated attack by “Damascus factions,” and that dozens of SDF fighters were killed or wounded defending it.
The statement added that the US-led coalition against Islamic State had not intervened despite repeated appeals to a nearby coalition base. The US military’s Central Command did not immediately respond to an emailed request for comment.
In its denial of the SDF account, the Syrian Ministry of Defense said army forces had bypassed Shaddadi, in line with deployment plans, and offered aid to SDF forces inside. The Syrian army announced it had established control over the city of Shaddadi and the prison.
The Syrian Defense Ministry also denied an SDF account of clashes between government and SDF forces near a jail in Raqqa, which the SDF said was holding IS inmates. It said the army had arrived “at the vicinity of al-Aqtan prison … and began securing it and its surroundings despite the presence of SDF forces inside”.
The SDF said nine of its fighters were killed and 20 wounded in clashes around al-Aqtan.
Hasakah province, which largely remains under SDF control, is home to the Kurdish-majority city of Qamishli, the main prisons holding Islamic State detainees, and a camp holding thousands of IS-linked prisoners.
GOVERNMENT FORCES DEPLOY
Reuters journalists saw government forces deployed in the city of Raqqa that the SDF had captured from Islamic State in 2017, and at oil and gas facilities in the eastern province of Deir al-Zor – both areas the Kurdish forces had held for years.
It follows the withdrawal of Kurdish forces from districts of Aleppo city they had controlled for years after fighting there earlier this month.
The 14-point deal published by Syria‘s presidency showed Abdi’s signature alongside Sharaa’s.
It stipulates that the prisons, along with all border crossings and oil and gas fields, would be handed to government control – steps the SDF had long resisted.
The timing of the handover of the prisons and camps was not announced.
Abdi, the SDF commander, confirmed on Sunday that the SDF had agreed to withdraw from Deir al-Zor and Raqqa provinces.
Abdi said he is set to meet Sharaa in Damascus on Monday and would share the details of the agreement with the public after his return to SDF-held territory, Kurdish media reported.
The deal says that all SDF forces will be merged into the defense and interior ministries as “individuals” and not as units, as the SDF had sought.
It commits the SDF to expel all non-Syrian figures affiliated to the Kurdistan Workers’ Party (PKK), a Kurdish militant group which fought a decades-long insurgency in Turkey.
Senior figures from Erdogan’s ruling AK Party said this removed a major obstacle to Turkey’s peace process with PKK militants.
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Israeli Government Sends 2026 Budget to Parliament, Approval at Risk From Rifts
A drone view of Jerusalem with the Knesset, the Israeli parliament, in Jerusalem, Feb. 4, 2025. Photo: REUTERS/Ilan Rosenberg
Israel’s Finance Ministry said on Monday it delivered the 2026 state budget draft to parliament ahead of a preliminary vote on Wednesday, though the plan’s prospects are clouded by political fractures that have strained the ruling coalition.
Delayed by political infighting, the cabinet last month approved the spending plan for this year after defense outlays were raised to 112 billion shekels ($35.45 billion) from an initial 90 billion.
The budget, as well as an accompanying economic plan, faces an uphill battle for approval as the government has become increasingly polarized. By law it must be approved by the end of March or an election would be triggered.
If approved on Wednesday, the budget will head to parliament‘s finance committee where it could undergo changes before its final two votes in the plenum.
For more than two years parties in the ruling coalition have splintered over the war in Gaza, the ceasefire that has halted it, and demands by ultra-Orthodox Jewish parties to exempt Jewish seminary students from mandatory military service.
In all, state spending would be 662 billion shekels excluding debt servicing. The deficit ceiling was set at 3.9% of gross domestic product, a level the Bank of Israel deems as too high since it does not allow for a reduction in the debt burden.
The budget deficit slipped to 4.7% of GDP in 2025 from 6.8% in 2023. A spike in defense costs due to the Gaza war pushed the deficit higher the past two years.
While the ceasefire has halted most fighting, it has not stopped entirely, and both sides have accused one another of violating the deal’s provisions.
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Iran to Consider Lifting Internet Ban as Brutal Crackdown Quells Protests; State TV Hacked
An Iranian woman walks on a street in Tehran, Iran, Jan. 19, 2026. Photo: Majid Asgaripour/WANA (West Asia News Agency) via REUTERS
Iran may lift its internet blackout in a few days, a senior parliament member said on Monday, after authorities shut communications while they used massive force to crush protests in the worst domestic unrest since the 1979 Islamic Revolution.
In the latest sign of weakness in the authorities’ control, state television appeared to be hacked late on Sunday, briefly showing speeches by US President Donald Trump and the exiled son of Iran‘s last shah calling on the public to revolt.
Iran‘s streets have largely been quiet for a week, authorities and social media posts indicated, since anti-government protests that began in late December were put down in three days of mass violence.
An Iranian official told Reuters on condition of anonymity that the confirmed death toll was more than 5,000, including 500 members of the security forces, with some of the worst unrest taking place in ethnic Kurdish areas in the northwest. Western-based Iranian rights groups also say thousands were killed.
ARRESTS REPORTED TO BE CONTINUING
US-based Iranian Kurdish rights group HRANA reported on Monday that a significant number of injuries to protesters came from pellet fire to the face and chest that led to blindings, internal bleeding, and organ injuries.
State television reported arrests continuing across Iran on Sunday, including Tehran, Kerman in the south, and Semnan just east of the capital. It said those detained included agents of what it called Israeli terrorist groups.
Opponents accuse the authorities of opening fire on peaceful demonstrators to crush dissent. Iran‘s clerical rulers say armed crowds encouraged by foreign enemies attacked hospitals and mosques.
The death tolls dwarf those of previous bouts of anti-government unrest put down by the authorities in 2022 and 2009. The violence drew repeated threats from Trump to intervene militarily, although he has backed off since the large-scale killing stopped.
Trump’s warnings raised fears among Gulf Arab states of a wider escalation, and they conducted intense diplomacy with Washington and Tehran. Iran‘s ambassador to Saudi Arabia Alireza Enayati said on Monday that “igniting any conflict will have consequences for the entire region.”
INTERNET TO RETURN WHEN ‘CONDITIONS ARE APPROPRIATE’
Iranian communications including internet and international phone lines were largely stopped in the days leading up to the worst unrest. The blackout has since partially eased, allowing accounts of widespread attacks on protesters to emerge.
The internet monitoring group Netblocks said on Monday that metrics showed national connectivity remained minimal, but that a “filternet” with managed restrictions was allowing some messages through, suggesting authorities were testing a more heavily filtered internet.
Ebrahim Azizi, the head of parliament’s National Security and Foreign Policy Committee, said top security bodies would decide on restoring internet in the coming days, with service resuming “as soon as security conditions are appropriate.”
Another parliament member, hardliner Hamid Rasaei, said authorities should have listened to earlier complaints by Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei about “lax cyberspace.”
During Sunday’s apparent hack into state television, screens broadcast a segment lasting several minutes with the on-screen headline “the real news of the Iranian national revolution.”
It included messages from Reza Pahlavi, the US-based son of Iran‘s last shah, calling for a revolt to overthrow rule by the Shi’ite Muslim clerics who have run the country since the 1979 revolution that toppled his father.
Pahlavi has emerged as a prominent opposition voice and has said he plans to return to Iran, although it is difficult to assess independently how strong support for him is inside Iran.