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Former Winnipegger Rabbi Shawn Zell’s new book a reflection on loss of loved ones
By MYRON LOVE Rabbi Shawn Zell’s newest publication, “Meaningful Mourning: Reflecting on the Life and Death of a Loved One,” is a thought-provoking and comprehesive contemplation of dealing with the process of grieving. In essence, “Meaningful Mourning” is a follow up to the former Winnipegger’s earlier book, “For Those Who Grieve,” which was published three years ago.
In an earlier interview with the Jewish Post regarding “For Those Who Grieve,”, Rabbi Zell noted that “one of the greatest frustrations when it comes to a shivah house is that, all too often, the atmosphere leaves much to be desired” – with people telling jokes, catching up on gossip and generally avoiding the subject of death and dying rather than rather than “sharing words of comfort and reflection and anecdotes and recollections of the deceased.”
“For Those Who Grieve,” he continues, aims to replace “tired and worn” readings in current shivah books with his own compositions which, he hopes, will give readers “new food for thought” that may “serve as a source of comfort to the bereaved and render the atmosphere of the shivah house more meaningful.”
‘What compelled me to write Meaningful Mourning”, Rabbi Zell says, “is to offer suggestions that may help clergy as well as others are uncomfortable dealing with.”
He cites, as an example, the funeral of a mentally-handicapped individual in our community roughly 50 years ago where Rabbi Peretz Weizman officiated. The individual was hit by a bus.
“I still recall Rabbi Weizman’s well-thought out words that the deceased had a tragic life and died a tragic death.”
Rabbi Zell also spoke of a more recent funeral at which he officiated where the widow was very angry that her husband had died. “The deceased had become involved in a dispute with the city over some property. His wife was adamant that he not try to fight city hall. He persisted and died of a heart attack. I tried to focus on appreciation of his life.”
In the introduction to “Meaningful Mourning,” he notes that “rifts in families are not uncommon. But how many readings in our canon broach such subjects?” he asks.
“And,” he continues, while Judaism makes it quite clear that you should choose life over death, there are occasions when one gives up one’s life to protect others.”
“Meaningful Mourning” consists of 15 chapters, each with a specific theme and each divided into a series of two-page readings – consisting of an exposition of how each day of the week, each month of the year, every Jewish festival, can provide comfort to mourners. Each reading also consists of a relevant poem and psalm.
In the first chapter, for example – which focuses on the daily order of creation, one comment in particular caught my attention – and made me think: When someone I know died suddenly, I sometimes wonder what that individual had planned for the rest of the day, what celebrations were coming up, what trip might the deceased have been looking forward to?
I recall one fellow coming to the evening minyans at my shul to say kaddish for his brother. Then, one day, he didn’t appear. I subsequently heard that he had developed an infection and died unexpectedly. I remember thinking that he wasn’t supposed to die. He still had several months left to say kaddish.
As Zell points out in “Meaningful Mourning,” “unlike the creation process, death does not necessarily wait for the deceased to complete everything he hoped to accomplish. In many cases, death has been compared to an unfinished symphony.
“From the Jewish perspective, the Angel of Death has little, if any, regard for projects yet to be completed, plans yet to be realized and dreams yet to be fulfilled.”
Another reading speaks of the signs of the zodiac and their connections to the equivalent Jewish months. “The sign for the month of Shvat is Aquarius, the water carrier,” Zell observes. “In Judaism, water is prayed for because water is seen as a blessing. But what happens when the natural flow of water is interrupted? How do we respond when tranquil water is usurped by troubled or turbulent water i.e., death?
“In a perfect world, the mourner would find solace in believing that he enriched with happiness and joy the one who was summoned from above.”
The accompanying reading with this topic is a poem intended to bring some comfort for mourners who are overcome with remorse or regret.
In “One Small Step,” Zell riffs on the immortal words of astronaut Neil Armstrong, the first man to step foot on the moon. “Little did Neil Armstrong realize that he was echoing the words of many a religious leader counselling a bereaved individual,” the rabbi comments. “Mourning that is proper and effective is a process of small steps and giant leaps.”
A leap of faith is necessary for several reasons, Zell adds, most of all so that the mourner is not consumed by pangs of guilt for not having been a better child, sibling or spouse. He quotes Ecclesiastes in saying that “when the dead is at rest, let his remembrance rest.”
“I hope that the readings in this book help to lessen the pain for the bereaved,” he writes.
Zell, who was formerly the spiritual leader of Congregation Tiferet Israel in Dallas, grew up in Winnipeg. The son of the late Ida and Phil Zell was initially ordained as a Conservative rabbi in the mid-1980s. He served in pulpits in that capacity in Sioux City, Iowa, and Clark, New Jersey. In 2004-2006 – while between congregations, he received his Orthodox smicha. He currently lives in retirement in New Jersey..
“Meaningful Mourning” is his fourth book – and his third focusing on different aspects of death and mourning. The book was published by Scribal Scion Publishers out of Teaneck, New Jersey.
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Winnipeggers recount experiences growing up in smaller communities
By MYRON LOVE “The place we call home,” observed Bruce Sarbit, “ – shtetl, town, city, country – is essential to who we are. We endow the place with personal meaning and it, in turn, provides us with a sense of identity and stability as we adapt to life’s circumstances in a rapidly changing world.”
For many Jewish Winnipeggers of an earlier era, like Sarbit, that sense of identity was first forged in smaller communities throughout Manitoba, Saskatchewan and Northwestern Ontario where our parents and grandparents – my own father and his family among them – found general acceptance as farmers, merchants and professional people while they also successfully strived to retain their sense of Judaism.
On Sunday, September 28, Sarbit was one of a group of four Winnipeggers who participated as part of the Jewish heritage Centre of Western Canada’s program “Beyond The Perimeter: Jews Outside of Winnipeg”, which was held at Temple Shalom. The four, in addition to Sarbit, were: David Greenberg, Sid Robinovitch and Lil Zentner – who began their lives growing up in Selkirk (for Sarbit), Portage La Prairie, Brandon and Esterhazy (Saskatchewan) respectively. The program grew out of the research conducted by Chana Thau, on behalf of the JHCWC, into Jewish life in smaller communities in Manitoba and Saskatchewan.
In Thau’s introduction, she noted the existence of several Jewish farm colonies that were established in the early years of the last century by German-Jewish Baron de Hirsch. At the same time, other Jewish immigrants (also all from the former Russian empire) to Canada were following the railroad and establishing themselves in the towns and cities that had grown up alongside the rail lines.
In the smaller communities, such as Shoal Lake – where I first lived (we were the only Jewish family) or Esterhazy (where Lil (Bober) Zentner’s family lived with two other Jewish families, the Jewish presence was minimal. In larger communities – such as Brandon, Portage and Selkirk – the number of Jewish families may have been between 20 and 30 at their peaks in the interwar years and into the 1950s. Brandon and Portage had their own synagogues.
The four speakers described many commonalities about Jewish life where they grew up. Their parents were storekeepers. Zentner’s parents, Max and Eva Bober, operated a general store in Esterhazy. Sid Robinovitch’s parents, Jack and Ethel Robinovitch, were proprietors of the Army and Navy Clothing store (which was a separate entity from the Army and Navy chain of stores which were headquartered in Regina, Sid pointed out) in Brandon. Sarbit proudly reports that his family’s Sarbit’s Department Store in Selkirk was, at one time, the largest independent store in western Canada. While David Greenberg’s father, the late I.H. Greenberg, was a lawyer in Portage la Prairie – and David and his brother, Barry, carried on the family legal practice in the community – his grandfather was first a journeyman lather who did plaster work on homes. The family later opened a second-hand store and subsequently constructed a grocery store – Greenberg’s Groceteria.
“The Greenberg grocery store extended credit to farmers and purchased their produce, which enabled it to thrive,” David Greenberg recalled. “I was once told by a friend years later that “Greenberg’s kept us alive” in the winter when they had virtually no money for food.
While the Greenberg, Robinovitch and Sarbit families arrived in Portage, Brandon and Selkirk respectively in the early 1900s – as part of the wave of Jewish immigration from Russia at the time –meaning the three were among the third generations in their communities, Lil Zentner’s parents, Max and Eva Bober were considerable later arrivals – having come to Canada respectively – in 1926 and 1930. They opened their general store in Esterhazy in 1936.
The Bobers, being newcomers, were more observant than Greenberg’s, Robinovitch’s, and Sarbit’s parents. Zentner was the only one of the four speakers who brought up the challenge of keeping kosher in a town far removed from shechita and kosher food. She recounted how her parents brought in kosher meat from Regina.
“We would buy chickens from local farmers,” she recounts. “We would take them to Melville (which numbered perhaps 30-40 Jewish families in the 1930s and 40s) to have them killed and then we would remove the feathers, cut off the heads and clean them at home.”
In Robinovitch’s telling, Jewish religious life in Brandon was “basic”. “We kept kosher in our home,” he remarks. “We brought in kosher meat from Winnipeg. We had a synagogue but, aside from the odd community event, it really only functioned on the High Holidays.”
David Greenberg noted that, for the first couple of decades, the Jewish community’s members davened in people’s homes. Portage’s Jewish community didn’t build a proper synagogue until 1950. Services were largely restricted to Friday evenings and the High Holidays. The merchants had to work on Saturdays. The community also made attempts to have a cheder, but with limited success.
While it would seem (from my own memories as well) that the general communities in those small towns respected the Jewish merchants in their midst – none of the four speakers mentioned any incidents of antisemitism – the Jewish families – even in the already more secular and integrated second and third generations – primarily socialized with other Jewish families.
In Portage – although the Jewish families did largely socialize with each other, the second and third generations also held leadership positions in the larger community. Greenberg noted that Jack Shindelman, Ben Kushner, and Irwin Callen all became aldermen, and Harold Narvey was re-elected chairman of the school board many times.
“My mother served as President of the Imperial Order Daughters of the Empire (IODE),” Greenberg noted, “and as a longtime volunteer at the Portage General Hospital Auxiliary. My father and his brother Allan became Exalted Rulers of the Elks Lodge, My Uncle Michael was leader of the Elks Band.”
In Zentner’s remembering, although she had many non-Jewish friends among the girls in her classes – her parents only got together socially with the other two Jewish families in town or Jewish families in nearby towns.
“In the summers, we would join other Jewish families at Round Lake, vacationing at Round Lake,” she recalled. “One summer, my parents sent me to a Habonim camp in the Qu’Appelle Valley where I met a lot of other Jewish kids.”
“For their social life, my family mixed almost exclusively with other members of Brandon’s Jewish community,” Robinovitch said. “There were Saturday evening poker nights and Sunday afternoon gatherings at Crystal’s Delicatessen. On Saturday afternoons, I would go to the movies and a couple of other Jewish kids in my school and I belonged to the Cubs and Boy Scouts.
“I had a few friends from school, but I always felt that I was different,” Robinovitch continued. “I was aware of being Jewish – although I had no real sense of what Jewishness was all about. I would say that the only time that I had any exposure to Jewish culture was when my parents sent me one summer to Herzl Camp in Wisconsin when I was 12 years old. It was a real eye opener being in an environment with so many other Jewish youngsters. I was exposed to a lot of Hebrew songs and, to this day, I still remember the Birkat Hamazon and V’ahavtah prayers that I learned there.”
The next year, the Robinovitch family moved to Winnipeg and young Sid quickly became immersed in Jewish life here. “In Brandon, I felt that we were defined by what we didn’t do,” he observed. “We didn’t go to school on the High Holidays. We didn’t have a Christmas tree. And we didn’t go to visit grandpa and grandma on the family farm.
“It was in Winnipeg where my identity as a Jew really began to take shape. Brandon was a nice place to live, but it could not provide the strong Jewish community values that emanate from a lager centre. A remnant of Jewish values still prevailed from the shtetl, but by my generation, they had worn thin.”
For Lil Zentner, the end of her time in Esterhazy came when she began dating a local boy. Her parents wouldn’t tolerate it when they found out. After a mighty blow-up, she challenged them to send her to Winnipeg where she could meet fellow Jews. Her older brother, Harold, was already here, going to university. Her parents agreed and they followed a year later.
For the Jewish community in Selkirk, Bruce Sarbit noted, being so close to Winnipeg, it was almost an extension of the larger city. His remarks were as much about nostalgia for Winnipeg as they were about Selkirk. “In my case,” he said, “I came into Winnipeg for everything Jewish – Hebrew lessons. Sunday Jewish history classes and YMHA clubs.”
The smaller city, he observed – at its peak home to perhaps 20 Jewish families, “fostered a strong sense of community among the Jewish families and helped them to hold onto their cultural and religious traditions, celebrate Shabbat, observe holidays, practise kashrut and maintain their Yiddish language as they ran businesses that necessitated interactions with the non-Jewish population”.
He added that his own father, Syd, who came to Portage at the age of three, was immersed in the general community as well – having twice served as president of the Chamber of Commerce, was also a member of the Rotary club, and once ran for election to the Legislature.
Unlike Portage and Brandon, though. Selkirk was close enough that the Jewish residents of Selkirk often drove into Winnipeg, attended High Holiday services here, visited relatives and, in general, partook of the activities, Jewish and otherwise, that the larger city provided.
Unlike Robinovitch and Zentner though, Sarbit did not spend all of his adult life in Winnipeg. He left Selkirk at the age of 18 for Brandon. For 40 years, the psychologist turned playwright served as a counsellor at Brandon University.
“The descendants of the first residents chose not to remain in Portage,” Greenberg concluded – in summing up the decline and disappearance of the other Jewish communities on the Prairies – with the exception of Winnipeg, Regina and Saskatoon. “Intermarriage was frowned upon and the children were too few in number and not close enough in age to socialize, so for girls to meet Jewish boys they were required to move to alarger centres, primarily Winnipeg. I believe culture was the motivating factor in their decision.
“Only my Uncle, Allan Greenberg, a bachelor, Harold and Mildred Narvey, and their son Bruce, who opened a chiropractic practice, remained. Bruce Narvey, as I mentioned, was the last of the resident descendants, before leaving after his mother died.”
Although Greenberg himself – and his brother, Barry – have lived most of their lives in Winnipeg, they continue to practise law in Portage and have had a history of community involvement in the Portage community. In recent years, David co-chaired the Portage and Area Beautification initiative committee through the Chamber of Commerce, resulting in seven years of service in the planning and implementation of the project. As a result, the committee was awarded its Citizenship of the Year award by the community. As for Barry Greenberg, he is a past president of the Portage & District Chamber of Commerce.
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Holocaust survivors group “Cafe Europa” celebrates 25th anniversary
By MYRON LOVE On October 12, 2000, the Jewish Child and Family Service (JCFS) invited Holocaust survivors in our community to attend an information session at the Gwen Secter Creative Living Centre to discuss how the community could better serve the needs of that segment of our community. What grew out of that meeting was the establishment of the Winnipeg chapter of Cafe Europa, an international organization originally established by the Conference on Jewish Material Claims Against Germany, which brings together Holocaust survivors to forge connections and community with others who have shared their experience.
On Thursday, October 23, 2025, a small group of our community’s rapidly dwindling survivors joined some of the JCSF staff who have been involved with the program over the years – including current president and CEO Al Benarroch, his predecessor, Emily Shane, JCFS seniors case worker Adeena Lungen, recently retired Cheryl Hirsh Katz, along with Keith Elfenbein and Heather Kraut – the current JCFS staff overseeing JCFS seniors programming – also Shelley Faintuch, who was the Jewish Federation of Winnipeg’s Director of Community Relations 25 years ago – for the for lunch at the Gwen Secter to celebrate the 25th anniversary of the founding of Winnipeg’s Cafe Europa.
“It is a really special moment for me to stand before you today as we commemorate the 25th anniversary of our Holocaust survivors’ social lunch program,” said Adeena Lungen, JCFS social worker. Lungen herself is the daughter of Holocaust survivors.
Al Benarroch, President and CEO of JCFS, added, ““Our Holocaust survivors are truly precious jewels, the living legacy, resilience, an embodiment of Jewish survival, and of ‘Am Yisrael Chai’. We owe them so much for their stewardship of Jewish truth and justice. They are truly righteous among us.”
Lungen continued: “It began with a simple idea to bring Holocaust survivors together and evolved into a regular biweekly group where survivors meet, share a meal, enjoy a program and find comfort in each other’s company. It has grown into an environment where survivors have been able to come together year after year supporting each other through illness, loss, and hardship, as well as celebrating together successes and family simchas.”
Lungen was one of two JCFS social workers who were at that original meeting 25 years ago, along with Shelley Faintuch – also the child of Holocaust survivors – representing the Federation. “Our initial idea was just to create a space where survivors could come together as a community of people with shared experiences and history,” Lungen recounted.
The name, “Cafe Europa”, she explained, comes from a cafe of the same name in Stockholm where survivors met in the early years after the war in the hopes of finding family and friends who had also survived the Holocaust.
Lungen recalled that the survivors who attended that first meeting were very clear about their vision for the group. “They weren’t looking for a therapy or support group – nor did they want to talk about their wartime experiences,” she said. “They simply wanted a program where they could socialize with other survivors. I came to understand their needs and desires to meet with others who understood loss and suffering in a way that only other survivors could.”
Speaking directly to the 15 survivors at the 25th anniversary lunch, Lungen praised them for their “indomitable will to live a life of purpose and meaning. You have shown all of us – in very real ways – what it means to rebuild your lives, to persevere and to believe in the possibility of goodness after unimaginable loss.
“We at JCFS are grateful for the opportunity to work with you, to learn from you and to be inspired by you.”
As the number of survivors in our community continue to decrease year after year, so too do the numbers attending Cafe Europa programs. Keith Elfenbeinn noted, “when Heather (Kraut) and I began working with the survivors 12 years ago, we had close to 50 attending our bimonthly programs (which feature lunch followed by speakers or performers). Now we get fewer than 20.”
He added that most survivors are in their late 80s or 90s now – including 100-year-olds Charlotte Kittner and Saul Fink.
Lungen in particular noted Elfenbein’s role in co-ordinating all aspects of Cafe Europa’s programming, including phoning survivors to arrange transportation, booking the speakers and entertainment, and liaising with the Gwen Secter Centre.
Shelley Faintuch delved into Canada’s sorry history with regard to largely having banned Jewish immigration here before the war and limiting the numbers after the war. She provided an overview – in her years as the Federation’s Community Relations director – to reach out to governments and build bridges to other faith and ethnic communities –as well as high school students, aimed at raising awareness of antisemitism and taking measures to fight this pernicious hatred.
The 25th anniversary program finished with a musical performance by Rabbi Matthew Leibl and Cantor Steven Hyman.
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A Touching Moment with a Winnipeg Connection
By GERRY POSNER Recently I learned of an event that just occurred in Kansas City, Missouri. It was an unusual event in that it was a full military and Jewish funeral for a Jewish man from the Kansas City area who died long ago – in 1942, in the Philippines, during the Second World War. His name was Simon Garelich or, as he was referred to in the funeral ceremony, Sgt. Simon Garelich. The event involved a reinterment of his body after some nearly 83 years. How did that happen and how is Winnipeg related, if at all, to this happening?
You have to go back to 1941 when the world was unravelling.There was war of course in Europe, parts of North Africa, and indeed in the Philippines as well, which were invaded by the Japanese at that time. Meanwhile, in the little city of St. Joseph, Missouri (60 miles north of Kansas City), a young Jewish boy by the name of Simon Garelich decided to enlist in the US Army. He was a first generation American, the youngest of 10 children. It is unlikely that he even realized the full implications of his signing up, the extent of the evil occurring, or the extent of the suffering and injustice experienced by his people. Nonetheless, he willingly went to war. He was not long into the service when he was shipped off to the Philippines to be a part of the fight against the Japanese there. In December 1941, Japanese forces invaded the Philippines. Intense fighting continued until the surrender of what was called the Bataan peninsula in April 1942. Garelich was one of the many soldiers captured and later interned at a POW camp. Over 2,500 men perished in that camp.
In April,1942, the Garelich family was notified that Simon was missing in action, but later they learned he was alive and a prisoner of war. They were later advised – in November 1942, that he had died and was buried with other prisoners at the Cabanatuan Camp Cemetery in Common Grave 107. In 2024, through the science of DNA and some dedicated researchers, the remains of what was an unknown soldier were connected to a 92-year-old niece of Simon’s, a resident of Kansas City Missouri. A long process then ensued to bring the deceased back to the USA for an appropriate ceremony. On October 7, 2025, a full service took place with many of the relatives of Simon Garelich in attendance, including many of his surviving nieces and nephews. Rabbi Talia Kaplan officiated at the Sheffield Cemetery in Kansas City.
As mentioned, Garelich had nine siblings, some of whom were born in Europe and others in the United States. One of his siblings was Helen Garelich who, in 1941, met a Winnipeg man who was then stationed in Gimli as part of the Canadian airforce. In 1941, he visited his sister in St. Joseph. During that visit, he met and courted Helen Garelich. This Winnipeg man was David Gilman. For many readers, the Gilman family (and there were several, some of whom used the spelling Gillman), is well known. For starters, from 1943 through 1967, David Gilman was a Chartered Accountant in Winnipeg and the senior partner in the firm of Gilman, Burke, Newman, Cantor. David and Helen began their married life in Kansas City and their oldest son, Sheldon, was born there but soon moved to Winnipeg. What connects this story to Winnipeg is the fact that Sheldon, who spent the first 23 years of his life in Winnipeg was named in memory of Helen’s brother, Simon.
Now, many of us are named for various relatives, likely for grandparents, even many for great grandparents or other family members, most of whom are long gone. But on October 7, 2025 in Kansas City, Missouri, there was Sheldon Gilman attending a ceremony honouring the very man for whom he was named. That would be a rare moment for any of us. He was moved by it all, as were various family members.
One of the family members, Laura Gilman, spoke and, during her homily, she quoted from the late Jonathan Sacks, whose remarks were so pertinent to the reinterment. “The secret of Jewish continuity is that no people has ever devoted more of its energies to continuity. The focal point of Jewish life is the transmission of a heritage across the generations.” The Garelich family reunion to honour their beloved Simon was just such a devotion to continuity.
