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This young American couple had Scotland’s first-ever queer Jewish wedding
(JTA) — Han Smith and Jennifer Andreacchi recently made international news for becoming the first queer couple to have a Jewish wedding in Scotland. But at the time they met, they had never been to Scotland, and they didn’t yet identify as queer — or Jewish.
Smith, 26, grew up in Cherry Hill, New Jersey, and has a Jewish father but wasn’t raised Jewish.
“I was content with that until a few years ago, when I began feeling like I wanted to reclaim something that had been lost,” said Smith, who uses they/them pronouns.
Andreacchi, 25, who is from Randolph, New Jersey, only discovered in 2018 that her father had one Jewish grandparent, when she did a DNA test.
The couple first met in the spring of 2015, when they both attended a New Jersey reception for admitted students of the College of William & Mary in Williamsburg, Virginia.
After noticing each other — mostly because they both asked the most questions out of everyone there — they exchanged numbers and began a friendly text connection over the summer.
When Andreacchi realized she might be queer, she chose Smith to come out to first, “as it can often be easier to tell a stranger than someone close to you,” she said. Smith confided they were feeling the same way.
Since Andreacchi was only 17 then and Smith 18, “we encouraged each other,” Andreacchi said. “It was nice to have someone going through coming out at the same time.”
“With Jen, I’m brave in a way that helps me know more about myself in the world,” said Smith. (Fern Photography)
They became part of the same friend group once they arrived at school, and it wasn’t long before they were dating.
“We started off a tad codependent, but we’ve managed to grow together, and have pushed each other and challenged each other to be our best selves,” said Andreacchi.
That included spending their junior year abroad at the University of St. Andrews in Scotland, “which was a really transformative experience for both of us,” Smith said. It also made them want to pursue moving abroad after graduation.
Smith took a class in modern Jewish history their senior year, which raised all kinds of questions about their ancestors (they knew their family surname had changed, but not from what). “It really started my journey and my approaching Judaism from a different angle,” they said.
The couple moved to Dublin after graduating in 2019. The next spring, they celebrated their first Passover together, while in lockdown.
The pandemic gave them a lot of time to talk and think, and during this time, “we began talking about Jewish identity, what it meant to us and what it could mean,” Smith said. They became more sure of their Judaism; at the same time, the couple determined that they wanted to keep living abroad. Andreacchi decided to pursue a master’s degree at St. Andrews, while Smith started a doctoral program in counseling and psychology at the University of Edinburgh, which brought them back to Scotland. Andreacchi now works in publicity for a publishing house.
While Andreacchi was supportive of Smith’s investigation of Judaism, when it came to herself, “I was intimidated by it for a while,” she said. “I wasn’t 100% sure what right I had to claim it.”
Guests danced a traditional Scottish jig called a ceilidh as well as the Jewish hora. (Fern Photography)
But in Edinburgh, they found a welcoming Jewish community, where, they said, many of the younger community members are queer. (In addition to Sukkat Shalom, the liberal community in Edinburgh, there is an Orthodox synagogue as well as Chabad. Edinburgh, Scotland’s capital city of about 500,000, is about 50 miles away from the much larger Glasgow, home to the fourth-biggest Jewish community in the United Kingdom and a queer-friendly, Yiddish-speaking, anarchist-run cafe.)
“We’ve found an amazing Jewish community here,” Andreacchi said. “The Edinburgh liberal community has really embraced us.”
When they began wedding planning, a Jewish wedding wasn’t on the table, as neither even knew yet that they would convert. But because they planned their wedding so far in advance, when they realized they could complete conversion beforehand, they set their sights on a Jewish ceremony. Both studied for their conversion under the supervision of Rabbi Mark Solomon, a London-based rabbi who serves Edinburgh’s Sukkat Shalom.
“He’s created a very safe and inclusive community,” Smith said.
“He has a very open-minded approach to what God is and the role of tradition, and he’s changed the gendered pronouns,” Andreacchi added.
They proposed to each other at Edinburgh Castle by reading letters to each other and exchanging rings in May 2021. Their conversions took place in September 2022.
When they began wedding planning, they had no idea they would be the first Jewish LGBT couple to marry in Scotland. But as word got out, community leaders wondered and then confirmed that, indeed, they would be the first.
The news of their wedding — which took place on Oct. 30, 2022 at St. Andrews, officiated by Solomon — was widely covered in the U.K. press. (Marriage for LGBT couples has been legal in Scotland since 2014.)
“There was a lot of excitement about us and our wedding that we didn’t anticipate,” Andreacchi said.
In Edinburgh, the couple found a welcoming Jewish community, where, they said, many of the younger community members are queer. (Fern Photography)
Andreacchi wore a forest green and gold velvet fantasy literature-inspired dress she found on TikTok, while Smith wore pants, a bowtie and suspenders, along with a scarf with the Mitchell tartan on it, because “while we were making history as Americans and not Scottish citizens, it was nice to feel like I was tying a piece of my ancestry together,” they said, referring to their mother’s roots in Scotland and Ireland.
The morning of their wedding, together with their wedding party, the couple decorated their chuppah together.
For the seven blessings, they assigned seven siblings, friends and cousins to expound upon themes that are important to the couple. Smashing the glass on the carpet took three attempts.
In addition to the hora, their reception included Scottish dances called ceilidh (pronounced “keely”).
“For a lot of my life, I wasn’t visible to other people, I felt a little small,” Andreacchi said. “Han was one of the first people who not only really saw me but radically accepted me and loved me and encouraged me to follow dreams I didn’t know were possible.”
Smith added, “With Jen, I’m brave in a way that helps me know more about myself in the world.”
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The post This young American couple had Scotland’s first-ever queer Jewish wedding appeared first on Jewish Telegraphic Agency.
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Support for Iran war among ‘connected’ US Jews falls again, poll finds
(JTA) — In the early days of the U.S.-Israel war on Iran, 68% of “connected” American Jews — those with ties to American Jewish institutions — supported the war, according to a poll taken by an Israeli public affairs institute.
That proportion fell weeks into the war and fell further to 60% just after President Donald Trump unilaterally announced a ceasefire on April 8, the same survey found, according to results released by the Jewish People Policy Institute last week and publicized on Sunday.
The decline was sharpest among those who identified as “leaning liberal,” 42% of whom are supportive of the war, down from 57% in early March.
At the same time, opposition among “connected” Jews has risen sharply, with about a third saying they oppose the war, up from 26% just after the war’s start. And only 14% of respondents said they believed the war had achieved “major success.”
The survey of 806 American Jews, taken April 15-19, drew from a panel that JPPI maintains and surveys regularly. The institute says its polls reflect the sentiments of “connected” Jews because its panel includes fewer intermarried Jews, more Jews who are affiliated with denominations and more Jews who have lived in Israel than demographic data suggests is representative of U.S. Jewry overall.
Two polls taken weeks into the war, before the ceasefire, found that most American Jews overall opposed the U.S. military campaign against Iran.
The latest results arrive as the future of the war and its dividends so far remain uncertain. Facing widespread public disapproval on Iran and pressure over oil prices, Trump has repeatedly extended the ceasefire despite failing to extract the major concessions from the Iranians that he has called for. This weekend, he said he was unsatisfied with their latest offer and said he remained torn between wanting to keep pressing for a diplomatic agreement or choosing to “go and just blast the hell out of them and finish them forever.”
Speaking at an event in Florida, Trump said. “Frankly, maybe we’re better off not making a deal at all. Do you want to know the truth? Because we can’t let this thing go on. Been going on too long.”
Iranian officials have reportedly said they expect a return to fighting, and the Israelis also have said they remain at a high level of military readiness.
A key sticking point is the future of Iran’s nuclear program, which Trump vowed to eliminate. The Iranians have offered to halt nuclear enrichment for up to five years, but Trump has rejected that offer and is pushing for a 20-year pause — longer than the 15-year hiatus in the agreement President Barack Obama in 2015 struck that Trump exited in 2018. Following the collapse of that deal, the Iranians are understood to have embarked on an enrichment spree, giving the regime the most nuclear material it has ever possessed. Much of that material remains buried but extractible under facilities Trump bombed last year.
This article originally appeared on JTA.org.
The post Support for Iran war among ‘connected’ US Jews falls again, poll finds appeared first on The Forward.
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A folksy approach to this year’s Yiddish symposium in Amsterdam
דעם 21סטן אַפּריל איז פֿאָרגעקומען דער יערלעכער אַמסטערדאַמער ייִדיש־סימפּאָזיום, נאָר דאָס יאָר איז עפּעס ניט געװען װי געװײנטלעך. איז מה נשתּנה, מיט װאָס איז דער הײַיאָריקער סימפּאָזיום געװען אַנדערש װי אַלע יאָר?
מיט 20 יאָר צוריק האָט דער פֿילאָלאָג און היסטאָריקער שלמה בערגער ע״ה געגרינדעט דעם סימפּאָזיום — װי אַ פֿאָרש־קאָנפֿערענץ. אלא װאָס, אין יאָר 2026 איז דאָס ניט געװען קײן שמועס פֿון פֿאָרשער צװישן זיך, אין העלפֿאַנדבײן־טורעם, נאָר אַ קולטור־אונטערנעמונג פֿאַרן ברײטן עולם.
שױן דאָס באַגריס־װאָרט האָט געשמעקט מיט פּאָפּולאַריזירונג און פֿאָלקסטימלעכקײט. באַגריסט האָט דעם עולם די לעקטאָרין פֿאַר דער ייִדישער שפּראַך און ליטעראַטור בײַם אַמסטערדאַמער אוניװערסיטעט, דניאלה זײַדמאַן־מאַוער. אַלײן רעדנדיק אױף ענגליש, האָט זי באַמערקט, אַז מאַמע־לשון קװעלט מן־הסתּם פֿון נחת, זעענדיק די חסידישע קינדער װאָס בײַ זײ אין מױל לעבט די שפּראַך װײַטער.
זײַדמאַן־מאַוער האָט פֿון צײַט צו צײַט פֿאָרט אַרײַנגעכאַפּט אַ ייִדיש װאָרט: „זיצן שיבֿעה“, „קוגל“, „חוצפּה“. אױך יצחק באַשעװיסן האָט מען דערמאָנט. װי ניט איז, קומט זײַדמאַן־מאַורער אַ גרױסער יישר־כּוח פֿאַרן אײַנאָרדענען דעם סימפּאָזיום. אין דעם פּרט איז איר אַרבעט געװען זײער אַ געראָטענע.
סך־הכּל זײַנען געװען דרײַ רעדנערס. בײַם אָנהײב איז אַרױסגעטראָטן דװקא אַ װיסנשאַפֿטלערין מיט אַ רעפֿעראַט װעגן לינגװיסטיק. דאָס איז געװען די שפּראַך־פֿאָרשערין חיה־רחל נאָװע פֿון ניו־יאָרק. זי האָט איבערגעגעבן אינטערעסאַנטע אױספֿירן פֿון איר פֿאָרשונג און בעת־מעשׂה פֿאַרװײַלט דעם צוהערער־עולם.
אײדער ניו־יאָרק האָט געהײסן ניו־יאָרק, האָבן דאָרט געװױנט האָלענדישע קאָלאָניסטן אין אַ ייִשובֿ אױפֿן נאָמען נײַ־אַמסטערדאַם. אַפֿילו די שפּעטערדיקע דורות האָבן נאָך אַ צײַט לאַנג אױפֿגעהיט די נידערלענדישע שפּראַך — זײ האָבן זיך געהאַט זײערע צײַטונגען און אױך אײגענע שולן. אױב אַזױ, האָט די לינגװיסטן נאָװע געטענהט, קען מען דאָך מאַכן אַ גזירה־שװה און זאָגן דאָס אײגענע װעגן דער חסידישער באַפֿעלקערונג הײַנט צו טאָג, װאָרן אַ סך חסידים לעבן זיך װײַטער אױס אױף דער ייִדישער שפּראַך — צװישן זײ נאָװע אַלײן.
בשעתן רעפֿעראַט האָט זי טאַקע געװיזן אַ קורצן פֿילם מיט איר אײניקל װאָס לײענט פֿון אַ ייִדיש־לערנבוך. בײַם סוף האָט זי נאָך געװיזן אַ מוזיק־װידעאָ מיט אַ רעפּ פֿונעם פּאָפּולערן חסידישן זינגער אַרי סאַמעט. „פּסח האָבן די קינדער דאָס געזונגען אָן אױפֿהער!“ — האָט זי געזאָגט.
צװישן די גורמים װאָס פֿאַרזיכערן דעם המשך פֿון דער שפּראַך האָט נאָװע דערמאָנט דעם פֿאַקט, װאָס מע קען פֿירן געשעפֿטן און מאַכן אַ קאַריערע אױף ייִדיש. מע דאַרף ניט צוקומען צו ענגליש כּדי פּרנסה צו האָבן. אַחוץ געזעלשאַפֿטלעכע פֿאַקטאָרן האָט נאָװע אױך אַרומעגערעדט פֿאַקטן פֿון דער שפּראַך גופֿא.
אינעם לשון פֿון הײַנטיקע חסידים געפֿינען זיך סימנים סײַ פֿון המשך און סײַ פֿון באַנײַונג. חסידים זאָגן, למשל, „אַלעס“ (פֿאַר „אַלץ“) — פּונקט װי דער ייִדיש־רעדנידקער עולם אין אונגאַרישן אונטערלאַנד פֿאַר דער מלחמה. פֿון דער צװײטער זײַט, זאָגט מען הײַנט צו טאָג „אײביק“ (ניט „אַלע מאָל“, „תּמיד“ אָדער „אַלץ“) — אַ װאָרט װאָס אַמאָליקע צײַטן האָט מען עס זעלטן װען געבראַכט פֿאַרן מױל, און אַז יאָ, איז מײנענדיק דװקא „נצח“ און ניט אַז מע טוט עפּעס שטענדיק, כּסדר.
דער צװײטער רעדנער אױפֿן סימפּאָזיום האָט שױן גערעדט אין גאַנצן ניט אַקאַדעמיש, נאָר דערצײלט אַנעקדאָטן, פּערזענלעכע זכרונות. אױך בײַ אים האָט מען זיך גוט פֿאַרװײַלט און ער האָט ניט אײן מאָל אַרױסגערופֿן אַ געלעכטער בײַם עולם. דאָס האָט געשמועסט דער שוועדישער פֿאַרלעגער ניקאָלײַ אָלניאַנסקי װעגן זײַן פֿאַרלאַג און װעגן דעם װי אַזױ ער האָט זיך גענומען צום אַרױסגעבן הײַנטצײַטיקע װעלטלעכע ליטעראַטור אױף ייִדיש.
אָלניאַנסקי איז אַ שװעד װאָס האָט זיך מגייר געװען. לכתּחילה האָט ער גענומען זיך לערנען ייִדיש כּדי ניט אָנצוּװערן זײַן סטודענטישע דירה. אָבער נאָך דעם האָט ער שטאַרק הנאה געהאַט פֿון די שפּראַך־לעקציעס מיט שלמה שולמאַנען ע״ה, װאָס האָט דעמאָלט געהאַלטן ייִדיש־לעקציעס אױפֿן לונדער אוניװערסיטעט. שפּעטערצו האָט ייִדיש געשפּילט אַ צענטראַלע ראָלע פֿאַר זײַן באַנעמען זיך אַלײן װי אַ ייִד.
מיט דער צײַט האָט אָלניאַנסקי, אין אײנעם מיט זײַן װײַב אידאַ, אַלײן אָנגעהױבן זיך אױסלעבן אױף ייִדיש און אַרױסגעבן אַ צײַטשריפֿט, װאָס אין איר האָבן זײ געשריבן װעגן „העװי מעטאַל“, װידעאָ־שפּילן און נאָך ענינים װאָס האָבן זײ פֿאַראינטערעסירט. די יונגע משפּחה אָלניאַנסקי איז אין גיכן דערגאַנגען צום אױספֿיר, אַז פֿאַרן ייִדישן המשך דאַרף מען האָבן װעלטלעכע קינדערביכער אױף ייִדיש. און דאָס פּאָרפֿאָלק איז ניט געזעסן מיט פֿאַרלײגטע הענט, נאָר זיך טאַקע גענומען צו דער אַרבעט.
שלום בערגער האָט דעמאָלט רעצענזירט זײערע ביכער פֿאַרן פֿאָרװערטס און אַראָפּגעריסן צװײ פֿון זײ. אָלניאַנסקי האָט זיך אָפּגערופֿן דערױף, אױך אינעם פֿאָרװערטס, מיט טענות קעגן „אַן עליטיזם װאָס שטײט תּמיד אין וועג דעם לעבעדיקן, הײַנטצײַטיקן ייִדיש.“ בערגער האָט געהאַלטן אַז אָלניאַנסקיס ביכער לײענען זיך טײל מאָל „װי אַ ראָבאָט װאָלט זײ אָנגעשריבן“. אױף דעם האָט אָלניאַנסקי געענטפֿערט — מיט אַ ראָמאַן װעגן אַ ייִדישיסט װאָס הײסט קאָליאַ ראָבאָטסקי.
בשעת װען די ערשטע צװײ רעפֿעראַטן האָט מען געהאַלטן אױף ענגליש, איז דער דריטער און לעצטער געװען — אױף פֿלעמיש, דער סאָרט האָלענדיש װאָס מע רעדט אין צפֿון־בעלגיע. דאָס האָט דערצײלט נפֿתּלי מאָסקאָװיטש, אַ חסיד פֿון אַנטװערפּן, װעגן זײַן אַרבעט װי אַן עצה־געבער אין שפּראַך־ענינים פֿאַר דער נעטפֿליקס־סעריע „רױע דימענטן“.
אין דער אמתן האָט מאָסקאָװיטש ניט נאָר געלערנט הילכות אױסשפּראַך, נאָר אױך ייִדישע פֿירונגען: װאָס טוט אַ שטײגער אַ פֿרומער ייִד װען ער כאַפּט זיך אױף פֿון שלאָף? װי אַזױ זאָגט מען מודה־אַני און גיסט אָפּ נעגל־װאַסער? װי אַזױ פֿירט זיך אַ חסידיש פּאָרפֿאָלק צװישן זיך?
װאָס שײך אַרױסרעד, האָט ער געשילדערט דעם גאַנג פֿון לימוד: צו ערשט דאַרף דער אַקטיאָר דאָך פֿאַרשטײן און קענען זאָגן די װערטער: װאָס — הערט — זיך, נאָר לסוף עס אַרױסרעדן: „װאָסערצאַך?“
אַז מע האָט געדאַרפֿט בראָקן פּסוקים לשון־קודש, האָט מאָסקאָװיטש זיך אָבער אַ מאָל מיאש געװען פֿונעם אױסלערנען זײַנע תּלמידים דעם אַרױסרעד. אײַנחזרן דעם פּיוט „אשת־חיל“ װאָלט זײ נאָך אַלעמען אָנגעקומען צו שװער. איז װאָס װעט מען טאָן אַז אַ משפּחה זעצט זיך אַװעק בײַם שבתדיקן טיש פֿרײַטיק־צו־נאַכט, און אַלע מאַנסבילן אין אײנעם דאַרפֿן זינגען אָט דעם לױבגעזאַנג לכּבֿוד דער ייִדישער פֿרױ?
צום סוף האָט מען רעקאָרדירט מאָסקאָװיטשן גופֿא עטלעכע מאָל װי ער זינגט אױס דעם ניגון, אַזױ אַז ס׳זאָל פֿאָרט קלינגען כּאילו דאָס זינגט אַ גאַנץ געזעמל מענערשע שטימען. װעגן אַזעלכע און אַנדערע פּרטים פֿון הינטער די קוליסן האָט מען זיך געקענט דערװיסן פֿון מאָסקאָװיטשן, װאָס אַרבעט אַנדערש װי אַ העברעיִש־לערער.
די אָרגאַניזאַטאָרן האָט זיך אַזױ אַרום אײַנגעגעבן אײַנצוסדרן אַ נאָכמיטאָג לעקציעס װאָס האָבן געקענט פֿאַראינטערעסירן סײַ אַקאַדעמישע פֿאָרשער־מבֿינים און סײַ דעם פּראָסטן, װײניקער באַהאַװנטן עולם. אַחוץ דעם איז דאָס אױך געװען אַ שײנע געלעגנהײט פֿאַר ייִדישיסטן זיך צונױפֿצוטרעפֿן און צו כאַפּן אַ שמועס אױף ייִדיש־לשון. דורך דעם האָט די ייִדישע שפּראַך גופֿא אױך געקראָגן אַ תּיקון אױף אָט דער לעבעדיקער אונטערנעמונג.
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A New Jersey congregation was already falling apart. Then came Oct 7.
Partly Strong, Partly Broken
By Nathaniel Popkin
New Door Books, $19.95, 249 pages
When Rabbi Adinah Feld returns to her reform congregation in New Jersey after a nearly week-long trip to Israel, she discovers two crises have occurred in her absence: The roof of the synagogue has collapsed after a heavy storm and the Muslim teenager, Fami, who helps clean the shul is in the hospital after a savage attack by a local white supremacist.
Things only further devolve from here in Partly Strong, Partly Broken, a new novel from author and former Wall Street Journal critic Nathaniel Popkin. The fictional synagogue of Temple Beth Israel fractures — metaphorically and physically — in the month leading up to the Oct. 7 Hamas attack.
Feld is presented as the archetypal neo-liberal American rabbi. Her trip to Israel, we quickly learn, consisted of participating in the pro-democracy protests and pining for her Palestinian ex-girlfriend, whom she first met nearly two decades earlier while living in Israel. Once she’s home, her attention is split between trying to fix the storm-damaged roof, respond to the attack, and finally launch the Hebrew learning center she’s been advocating for the synagogue to have for years.
But at every turn there’s a challenge: The incompetent and combative building manager can’t seem to get the roof fixed; some congregants believe Feld’s concern for Fami is proof she cares more about Muslims than Jews; a wealthy board member wants his name on the Hebrew center and his project manager in charge — a woman who takes personal offense when Feld invites the local Imam to join tashlich.
Many readers will probably see their own congregation in the fictional Temple Beth Israel, especially if they’ve served on a synagogue’s board or committee. But for those who have avoided seeing behind the administrative curtain of a synagogue, the complex power dynamics might come as a shock.
Popkin deftly captures a stark truth: The attack on Oct. 7 and the subsequent war didn’t create the divisions over Israel in the Jewish community; it exposed tensions that were already there. This reality, combined with a prophecy from the Book of Daniel — Daniel tells Babylonian King Nebuchadnezzar that his dream of a statue with feet made of iron and clay reveal that the foundations of his kingdom were “partly strong, and partly broken.” — is the inspiration for the book’s title.
For some, the fact that Jews have always been divided over Israel may not seem like a particularly insightful observation. But after Oct. 7, there was a lot of shock and outrage among the Jewish community at the wide range of opinions in their communities. As Partly Strong shows, when synagogues avoid talking about Israel to mitigate conflict (or please wealthy donors, as Feld does in the book), they don’t prevent conflict — they just make disagreements and tough discussions about Israel taboo and volatile.
In Popkin’s novel, the conflict comes to a head less than a week before Oct. 7 at a whiskey-fueled book talk where a Jewish comparative literature professor presents his claims about understanding the role of epigenetics and inherited trauma in the book of Genesis. The conversation quickly turns towards trauma among Israelis and Palestinians — a subject the drunken congregants are not prepared to discuss civilly.
As startlingly realistic as Popkin’s story is, the strong narrative occasionally feels disrupted by verbose, overexplanatory writing (“She’d better go find Fami right away and give her the silver chain with the hamesh pendant, the palm-shaped amulet of protection that is usually called by its Arabic name, hamsa, and sometimes the hand of Fatima, for the daughter of Mohammed”) and a surfeit of subplots. At one point, readers are pulled away from the main story for a brief and sappy sex scene between two teenage Hebrew school instructors on a faux polar bear rug (the girl is described as “dessert” and the boy is described as an “Olympic eater”). While it was impressive to see what seemed like half of my home congregation represented, at some point it becomes too much to keep track of all the characters, big or small, and all their issues.
We don’t actually see how the characters respond to Oct. 7 — the book ends with a small group of them huddled together watching the first reports of the attack on a television. We’re left to imagine how Feld and her congregation will handle the aftermath — although readers have probably already lived it themselves.
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