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An Arizona cemetery now requires mourners to leave before burial. A rabbi plans to sue.
At Jewish funerals, the final act is often the simplest: the casket is lowered into the earth, mourners take turns with a shovel, and the grave slowly fills. It is a moment many rabbis describe as the essence of burial — the point at which ritual, grief and physical reality meet.
At a cemetery in Scottsdale, Arizona, that moment now does not happen.
A new safety policy at Paradise Memorial Gardens requires families to leave before a casket is lowered into the ground. Cemetery officials say the rule, which applies to all funerals, is necessary to prevent accidents, likely involving uneven ground, heavy equipment and mourners overcome with grief. But Jewish clergy say the policy interferes with a core religious ritual, and one local rabbi is preparing a lawsuit.
For Cindy Carpenter, 66, the dispute became painfully personal.
Her younger daughter, Chelsea, died at 33 of cancer in November. As Carpenter arranged the funeral, she and her husband purchased five burial plots at Paradise — for their two daughters, themselves and Chelsea’s husband — expecting the family would be buried together and according to Jewish practice. In total, the plots cost about $50,000, Carpenter said.
Eleven weeks later, Carpenter returned to the same cemetery to bury her older daughter, Cortney, who had significant disabilities and died at 40 after a long illness. Between the first funeral and the second, Carpenter said, the cemetery moved from compromise to refusal.
At Chelsea’s funeral, after intervention from local rabbis, mourners say they were allowed to stay but were placed around 20 feet away behind a rope while the casket was lowered. It was an imperfect accommodation Carpenter said she accepted. She understood the attempt to balance safety and tradition.
When Cortney died at the end of January, Carpenter said, that accommodation was gone. The standardized printed contract for the graveside service had added to it an additional handwritten note at the bottom stating that the casket would not be lowered until the “family has departed.” Carpenter said she was told that they had to leave the property altogether and that her request to stay inside a building at the cemetery and watch from a window was denied. Carpenter and her husband, Jim, signed under protest because the funeral was the next day.
Cindy added her own handwritten note: “I object to this awful policy,” while Jim wrote: “I acknowledge your policy & strongly object to the policy.”
“We’re grieving parents for the second time in 11 weeks,” Carpenter said in an interview. “And you’re telling me I can’t stay to see my daughter buried?”
Rabbi Pinchas Allouche of Scottsdale’s Congregation Beth Tefillah, who officiated at the funerals for both of Carpenter’s daughters, confirmed that everyone who came for Cortney’s funeral was told they could not wait in their cars and had to leave the property. “It was horrible,” Allouche said.
Afterwards, Allouche sent his 24-year-old son back into the cemetery — dressed in a baseball cap and sunglasses — to pretend to be a random person visiting a nearby grave. “From there,” Allouche said, his son “took a video of the lowering of the casket and the covering of the grave for the family to have some slice of comfort in all this.”
Cemetery officials say the rule is not aimed at any one faith. Sabrina Messinger-Acevedo, CEO and owner of Messinger Mortuaries, which operates Paradise Memorial Gardens, said the cemetery is non-denominational and that its safety policies are applied uniformly. She acknowledged the new policy does “not fully align with certain religious traditions,” but said it was adopted after past incidents in which attendees failed to follow staff directions, creating safety concerns.
Messinger Mortuaries operates multiple funeral homes, cemeteries and crematories across Arizona, including Paradise Memorial Gardens, which has a large Jewish section.
Cortney’s funeral was Feb. 3, but the dispute did not gain attention until it was reported by the local news on Feb. 16. Carpenter said the delay was due to the non-stop coverage of the Tucson disappearance of Nancy Guthrie, the mother of Today show host Savannah Guthrie.
Eddie Dressler, a funeral director who has served Atlanta’s Jewish community since the 1990s, said he has never encountered a cemetery policy requiring families to leave before the lowering of a casket. “Having a rule like that is just crazy,” Dressler said.
The only similar restrictions he has seen are at some U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs cemeteries, which open multiple graves at once for logistical reasons — but even there, he said, exceptions are typically made for Jewish burial practices.
Safety and spirituality
Allouche said the rule removes what Jewish law considers the defining moment of burial. The lowering of the casket and the covering of the grave, he said, are not symbolic gestures but the final act of care for the dead — one traditionally performed with mourners present and often participating.
Allouche said he is working with an attorney and expects to challenge the policy, arguing that families who purchased plots in the cemetery did so with the expectation they would be able to bury loved ones according to Jewish practice. Applying the rule without exception, he said, effectively prevents that.
Rabbi Randy Brown, the resident rabbi at Arlington National Cemetery who has officiated at more than 900 funerals there, said safety concerns at gravesides are real. He has personally helped prevent people from falling in “dozens of times.”
But Brown said most cemeteries do not impose blanket bans. Instead, clergy, funeral directors and grounds crews typically coordinate accommodations, such as keeping families at a distance during the lowering and allowing them to return afterward to place earth on the grave, a practice that preserves both safety and ritual meaning.
Graveside funerals, he said, function both as sacred ritual and, with bulldozer equipment nearby, active work sites. Arlington, he added, approaches each burial individually — considering weather, terrain and family needs — rather than applying a single policy to every service.
Brown described the moment when earth strikes the casket as emotionally powerful for many mourners, recalling his own experience at his grandmother’s funeral as “visceral and cosmic.” That meaning, he said, is why cemeteries and clergy typically seek practical compromises. “It’s not one size fits all,” he said.
Religious disputes have surfaced elsewhere. In Atlanta in 2023, for example, a synagogue threatened to sue after a cemetery policy was seen by rabbis as interfering with Jewish burial customs. The cemetery eventually settled.
Allouche said he expects legal action to move forward. Some families who own plots at the cemetery have begun reconsidering their plans, he said, while others are waiting to see whether the cemetery revises its rules or reaches a compromise with community leaders.
Messinger-Acevedo said her company — founded in 1959 by her grandparents, Paul and Cora Messinger — has “deep roots in the community” and a commitment to serve families with “care and compassion.” She said they offer “partial refunds to families who choose to rescind the purchase of an unused burial space” — a complex decision for those with relatives already buried at the cemetery.
Carpenter said the dispute is not something she wanted to fight, but one she felt compelled to pursue. Nearly two decades ago, she founded Cortney’s Place, a day program for adults with disabilities created in her older daughter’s honor, and is now working with local clergy to create “Shabbat boxes” for Jewish patients in hospitals — small packages with challah, candles and grape juice inspired by Chelsea.
“I fought for them all of their life,” Carpenter said. “And this is no different.”
The post An Arizona cemetery now requires mourners to leave before burial. A rabbi plans to sue. appeared first on The Forward.
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Amsterdam’s New Warning to Europe on Antisemitism
Anti-Israel protesters clash with police outside Amsterdam’s Concertgebouw, breaking through barricades and setting off smoke bombs during a demonstration against a performance by the IDF’s chief cantor. Photo: Screenshot
Amsterdam likes to present itself as a city of tolerance. It celebrates diversity, prides itself on openness, and often reminds the world of its history as a refuge for those seeking freedom. Yet something deeply troubling happened in Amsterdam last week that should concern not only the Netherlands, but all of Europe:
A municipal debate about antisemitism had to be held at a secret location because of security concerns.
Pause for a moment and consider what that means. In a democratic European capital, a discussion about protecting a Jewish minority could not take place openly for fear of threats and intimidation. If that does not signal a serious problem, what does?
That’s in addition to the bombing of a Jewish school, and another attack that just occurred.
During the meeting, a 15-year old Jewish boy addressed the room. His testimony cut through political rhetoric and statistics with the clarity only a young voice can bring. Since the October 7, 2023, massacre in Israel, he said, life for Jewish students in Amsterdam has changed dramatically. Many of his friends have already left the city. They no longer see a future there.
Imagine hearing those words in 2026 in one of Europe’s most celebrated liberal cities. A teenager speaking calmly about the disappearance of his community.
Amsterdam alderman Melanie van der Horst was visibly moved and struggled to hold back tears. The emotional moment showed that some political leaders understand the gravity of what is happening. Yet empathy alone will not solve the problem.
Another participant in the debate raised a painful but necessary question: How must it feel for Jewish residents to walk daily through public spaces where demonstrations take place in which their country and their people are shouted down? Pro-Palestinian protests have become a constant presence in parts of the city. Political protest is a democratic right, but when rhetoric turns into open hostility toward Jews, society has crossed a dangerous line.
One proposal during the debate illustrated the level of frustration. A politician suggested sending undercover police officers into the streets wearing a kippah in order to identify those who harass Jews. Critics called the idea controversial. But the fact that such a measure is even being discussed reveals how serious the situation has become.
The problem extends beyond the streets. Jewish organizations in the Netherlands increasingly report difficulties renting venues for events. Cultural gatherings and lectures sometimes struggle to find halls willing to host them. It rarely makes headlines, but this quiet exclusion sends a clear message: you are welcome in theory, but not visibly.
History has taught Europe where that kind of atmosphere can lead. Antisemitism rarely begins with violence. It begins with discomfort, social pressure, and the slow normalization of hostility toward Jewish identity.
Meanwhile, another factor fuels the problem. Much of the European media landscape presents Israel through a lens that reduces a complex reality to a simple narrative of aggressor and victim. When context disappears and facts are replaced by slogans, public perception shifts. The hostility directed at Israel easily spills over into hostility toward Jews living thousands of kilometers away.
That is why factual education and responsible journalism matter so much. Civil society organizations that work to counter misinformation often struggle to be heard. Yet without a commitment to truth, public debate becomes an echo chamber for activism rather than a search for understanding.
There is also a question for Jewish communities themselves. When fear grows, the instinct to become less visible is understandable. But invisibility comes at a cost. If intimidation forces people to hide their identity, those spreading hatred learn that their tactics work.
The lesson of Jewish history is painfully clear. Silence has never protected Jewish communities.
Strength does not mean confrontation. It means refusing to surrender identity and dignity to intimidation. It means raising a generation that is proud rather than afraid. It means understanding that resilience is sometimes the only answer to those who seek to erase a people’s presence.
The young boy in Amsterdam asked a simple question without even intending to pose a challenge to Europe: will the Jewish community still exist here in the future?
That question should echo far beyond the walls of the municipal chamber where he spoke. Because if a Jewish teenager in Amsterdam already doubts his future in the city, then Europe is facing not just a Jewish problem.
It is facing a moral test of its own values.
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Billy Crystal Leads Tribute at Oscars for His Late Best Friend, Jewish Filmmaker Rob Reiner
Billy Crystal speaks about Rob Reiner during the Oscars show at the 98th Academy Awards in Hollywood, Los Angeles, California, US, March 15, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Mike Blake
Billy Crystal delivered an emotional tribute to his late best friend and legendary actor-turned-director Rob Reiner at the 98th Academy Awards on Sunday night, and was joined on stage by several of Reiner’s other Hollywood friends and stars of his iconic films.
While eulogizing Reiner at the Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles, Crystal, 78, spoke about his longtime friend as a “master storyteller” and mentioned his long list of memorable projects. The longtime collaborators first met in 1975, when Crystal was cast as Reiner’s best friend in an episode of “All In The Family.”
“My friends, Rob’s movies will last for lifetimes, because they were about what makes us laugh and cry, and what we aspire to be far better in his eyes: far kinder, far funnier, and far more human,” Crystal said. He then talked about Reiner’s marriage to the late Michele Singer Reiner, who was killed alongside her husband on Dec. 14. Crystal called the two “unstoppable” together and said the couple’s loss is “immeasurable.”
“A gifted photographer, she not only produced films with Rob, but it was her energy that had them working tirelessly to fight social injustice in the country that they both loved,” he added. “Rob and Michele Reiner became the driving force in the landmark decision for marriage equality across the United States.”
“To the millions who have enjoyed his films all these years, I want you to know, here and around the world, how many times Rob told me that it meant everything to him, that his work meant something to you — and for us who had the privilege of working with and knowing him and loving him,” Crystal continued.
After the “When Harry Met Sally” star concluded his speech — by saying “Buddy, what fun we had storming the castle” — over a dozen actors who worked alongside the director on films joined Crystal on stage and stood silently together. They included Meg Ryan, Michael McKean, Jerry O’Connell, Mandy Patinkin, Kathy Bates, Annette Bening, John Cusack, Demi Moore, Kiefer Sutherland, Daphne Zuniga, Christopher Guest, Wil Wheaton, Fred Savage, Cary Elwes, Carol Kane, and Kevin Pollak. They had worked with the late filmmaker on movies that included “When Harry Met Sally,” “The Princess Bride,” “This Is Spinal Tap,” “Misery,” “A Few Good Men,” and “Stand by Me.”
Sunday night’s tribute came three months after the director died at the age of 78 on Dec. 14.
Crystal was introduced to the stage by Conan O’Brien, who was hosting the Oscars on Sunday night but was also one of the last people to see the Reiners alive. The couple was found stabbed to death in their Brentwood home hours after they attended a holiday party at O’Brien’s house on Dec. 13. Two sources who attended the party said they witnessed a loud verbal exchange between the Reiners and their middle son, 32-year-old Nick Reiner. He was arrested the following night and charged with murdering his parents.
The younger Reiner is charged with two counts of first-degree murder with special circumstances, including the use of a knife. He pleaded not guilty and has remained in custody without bail since his arrest. Reiner is next due in court on April 29 and could face life in prison without parole, or the death penalty, if convicted.
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Israel Says It Has Plans for At Least 3 Weeks of War as Airstrikes Pound Iran
Emergency personnel work at the site of a strike on a residential building, amid the US-Israeli conflict with Iran, in Tehran, Iran, March 16, 2026. Photo: Majid Asgaripour/WANA (West Asia News Agency) via REUTERS
Israel said on Monday it had detailed plans for at least three more weeks of war as it pounded sites across Iran overnight, while Iranian drone attacks temporarily shut Dubai airport and hit a key oil facility in the United Arab Emirates.
The US-Israeli war on Iran is now entering its third week with no clear end in sight, largely shutting the Strait of Hormuz, through which 20% of the world’s oil and liquefied natural gas flow, pushing up energy prices and raising fears of a spike in global inflation.
US President Donald Trump on Sunday called for a coalition of nations to help reopen the strait and said the US-led NATO defense alliance faced a “very bad” future if its members failed to help.
But while allies voiced support for diplomatic efforts to reopen the route, they were cautious about joining any military action.
ISRAEL STILL HAS ‘THOUSANDS’ OF TARGETS IN IRAN
Israeli military spokesperson Lieutenant Colonel Nadav Shoshani told reporters there were detailed operational plans for the war with Iran for the next three weeks, and other plans extending further ahead.
Israel has said it wants to weaken Iran‘s capacity to threaten it, striking ballistic missile infrastructure, nuclear facilities, and the security apparatus, and that it still has thousands of targets to hit.
“We want to make sure that they are as weak as possible, this regime, and that we degrade all their capabilities, all parts and all wings of their security establishment,” Shoshani said.
Iranian Foreign Minister Abbas Araqchi for his part said Tehran had not asked for a ceasefire or exchanged messages with the US, according to Iran‘s semi-official Student News Network.
In a post on X, Araqchi also said that some “neighboring states” that host US forces and permit attacks on Iran were also actively encouraging the killing of Iranians.
“Stances should be promptly clarified,” he said.
He said 200 children were among the hundreds of Iranian civilians killed in US or Israeli bombings.
Fars News Agency reported that several civilians had been killed in a strike near Tehran’s Martyrs’ Square, without giving figures.
ISRAEL CLAIMS STRIKES ON IRAN‘S SPACE PROGRAM
The Israeli military said on Monday it was carrying out air strikes on Tehran, Shiraz, and Tabriz.
It said its Air Force had also struck sites linked to Iran’s space program, including destroying a research facility in Tehran involved in developing a satellite launched in 2024.
One Tehran resident told Reuters that there had been no internet overnight and Iranians felt isolated from the world.
“People are being killed,” Shahnaz, 62, said via WhatsApp. “Just days before Nowruz (Iranian New Year, on March 20), but people are not in the mood to celebrate. When will this end?”
Asked if she supported the Islamic Republic, Shahnaz said: “No, I don’t. How can I? They killed my granddaughter in [January’s] protests. We want this regime to go. We want this misery to end.”
In Israel, air raid sirens warned of Iranian missiles. Iran‘s Revolutionary Guards said Tehran had launched attacks on areas In Tel Aviv, the US al-Dhafra air base in Abu Dhabi, the US naval base in Bahrain, and Bahrain’s Sheikh Issa air base.
Furthermore, oil loading operations at the UAE port of Fujairah on the Gulf of Oman were suspended following an Iranian drone strike.
Fujairah is a key exit point for the UAE’s Murban crude – a volume equivalent to roughly 1% of global demand.
Flights at Dubai International Airport, one of the world’s busiest, were suspended for several hours after a drone strike on a nearby fuel storage facility sent plumes of black smoke into the sky. Saudi Arabia intercepted 34 drones in its eastern region in one hour, state media said. No injuries were reported in either incident.
Later on, Reuters reporters also heard booms in the Qatari capital, Doha.
OIL SLIPS ON BESSENT SHIPPING COMMENTS
Despite the turbulence, oil prices, which had been above $100 a barrel, fell sharply and stocks rallied after US Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent told CNBC the US was “fine” to let some Iranian fuel vessels sail through the strait, and believed Indian and Chinese tankers had also passed through.
Ship-tracking data showed a Pakistan-bound oil tanker had passed through the Strait of Hormuz over the weekend, indicating that some countries are able to negotiate safe passage for their vessels.
On Sunday, Trump had demanded that countries relying heavily on oil from the Gulf should help protect the strait, and said he hoped China, France, Japan, South Korea, Britain, and others would participate.
However, many – including Germany, Italy, Greece, Japan, and Australia – said they would not send warships.
Israel continued to strike Lebanon and Gaza, attacking Iran-backed Hezbollah and Palestinian Hamas terrorists. The Israeli military said its troops had begun limited ground operations against Hezbollah positions in southern Lebanon.