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This Jewish couple ended their three-country wedding tour with a colorful Oaxacan ceremony

(JTA) — For the third of their three weddings, Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel set up a chuppah in Oaxaca, the Mexican city where they first confessed their love for each other.

Oaxaca is a vibrant hub of Mexican folk art and incredible food, but Jewish life? Not so much. Nonetheless the couple chose there to wed in an egalitarian Jewish ceremony led by the groom’s sister, Libby Smoler, on Feb 26. And when seven family members and friends gave their own interpretations of the seven traditional blessings, one of Applebaum’s sisters wished them a lifetime of adventures and delicious meals.

The wedding came just over three years after the pair met — online, from their parents’ houses early in the pandemic.

Applebaum’s parents weren’t subtle about wading into her dating life after she moved home to Portland, Maine, in early 2020, the only one of their four children to do so. Her father showed her a video about dating apps and her mother asked her for a demonstration.

Applebaum, 35, downloaded Hinge. The next thing she knew, her mother was hooked. “She’s swiping and swiping, and saying, ‘This is fabulous,’” Applebaum recalled, adding with a joke, “I told her, ‘You have to have some standards.’”

In Los Angeles, where Applebaum had been living, she had been focused first on her job as a producer of external communications for the educational technology division of the World Bank, and her all-consuming side project as the founder of Future of Women, which hosts breakfast events around the world and hosts a podcast for women leaders.

But in her childhood home, with no timeline for when life would resume, she decided to dive into dating, drawing on her extensive experiences living and traveling abroad to experiment with what would generate the most promising results.

“I put my location as different places, like Mexico City or London, for the fun of it,” she said. “When we were so isolated, to have contact with people in these places was nice. But, then, I put myself in a more realistic location.”

That location was New York City, where she soon encountered Raffel, an attorney in the tech industry.

Elan Raffel breaks the glass during his wedding ceremony with Hallie Applebaum, in Oaxaca, Mexico, Feb. 26, 2023. (Mónica Godefroy)

The pair matched and soon learned that they had a lot in common. Like Applebaum, Raffel had moved back in with his parents at the start of the pandemic — in his case Pikesville, a heavily Jewish suburb of Baltimore. Both had attended Jewish day schools growing up; both had spent time living abroad (Applebaum in Guatemala, Ecuador and while pursuing a master’s degree at the London School of Economics and Raffel in his mother’s native Israel); and both enjoyed fine food and off-the-beaten-path adventures.

After months of phone calls and probing conversations — some fueled by “The 36 Questions that Lead to Love” as appeared in The New York Times — they decided that Raffel would join Applebaum for a camping trip in Maine’s Acadia National Park.

“We had an out,” Raffel recalled. “If either of us had a terrible experience, we could back out.”

That wasn’t needed. Instead, they extended their time together — after kicking it off with an unplanned first meeting for Raffel with Applebaum’s parents when she forgot a cooler of food at their house.

“We joke that our first date was two weeks long,” said Raffel.

Soon after, Applebaum met Raffel’s family for Rosh Hashanah dinner. Then, Raffel rented a home in Los Angeles after Applebaum returned there.

With remote work the norm, and a few months dating now behind them, they began considering living and working elsewhere. They decided on Mexico, spending one month in Merida and one month in Oaxaca.

With its vibrant food scene and colorful arts and culture, the couple both fell in love with Oaxaca, and with each other. It was there that they first said, “I love you.”

Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel pose with dancers who joined their public wedding procession in Oaxaca. (Mónica Godefroy)

They returned to Mexico in the summer of 2022 while their new condo in Santa Monica was undergoing renovations; it was there that they became engaged. They now regularly host Shabbat dinners in their L.A. home through the nonprofit OneTable.

The first of their three wedding ceremonies took place on Sept. 30, 2022, when they were legally married at the Los Angeles County Courthouse.

The next event took place in Israel, where Raffel’s mother had long hoped that one of her three children would marry. He was her last hope, so the couple said yes to what they thought would be a small wedding there planned by her.

But Shuli Raffel’s plans grew larger and larger, until finally, Applebaum’s parents decided to come and her London-based sister, too. Rabbi Shira Levine of Kibbutz Hanaton, rooted in the Conservative movement of Judaism, officiated a religious ceremony on Oct. 14 at Bistro de Carmel in Zichron Ya’akov with 90 guests present.

Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel held one wedding ceremony in Israel, where Raffel’s mother is from. (Taylor Applebaum)

Levine had guided the couple via video calls in writing their own text for the Jewish wedding contract, the ketubah.

“We spoke to the rabbi about ​our relationship, our household, and how do we make this concrete and what traditional things do we want to modify and make more egalitarian,” Applebaum said, adding, “Since I do a lot of work in women’s empowerment, it was important to me to have a woman rabbi.”

Then, over Thanksgiving weekend, the couple held an Israeli brunch in Philadelphia, attended by their grandmothers — Applebaum’s is 102 — who would not be traveling to Mexico. From there, they flew directly to Oaxaca for a menu tasting, where, because Applebaum is vegetarian, it fell to Raffel to try all the fish and meat options they might offer their guests.

The couple returned to Oaxaca for the main affair — a multi-day event that included a day-long tour to a facility where mezcal, a Oaxacan spirit, is made; visits to craftspeople; and two nights of dinners.

On Feb. 26, they had their third and final wedding in front of 72 guests at Cardenal Oaxaca, an events venue. Spicy pineapple mezcal cocktails kicked off the celebration, and a festive meal that won accolades even from foodie guests followed the ceremony.

At their Oaxaca wedding, Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel served guests a native corn milk epazote sponge cake with lime cream. (Hallie Applebaum)

“It was amazing,” said Ori Zohar, a guest who is also the co-founder of spice company Burlap & Barrel. “The wedding meal was a procession of Mexican and Oaxacan specialties with an international twist. Beets were grilled and paired with pumpkin seeds and pickled mustard seeds. Duck enchiladas came slathered in a black mole sauce and aged cheese. The main dishes were shared plates, so each guest got to try a little of everything before going back and polishing off the rest of their favorite.”

In one highlight of the day, the couple partook in a local custom where tall likenesses of the couple are made out of paper maché and carried, and people toast the bride and groom. It was, Applebaum said, a perfect way to show off a beloved place to their friends and family.

“Our guests went from this beautiful ceremony that his sister put together,” she said, “to being immersed in this celebration in the streets.”

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The post This Jewish couple ended their three-country wedding tour with a colorful Oaxacan ceremony appeared first on Jewish Telegraphic Agency.

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Democratic senators seek to remove US-Israel defense cooperation from spending bill

(JTA) — A group of 12 senators who are Democratic or caucus with the Democrats are lobbying against expanded defense cooperation between the United States and Israel, saying the Netanyahu government’s policies, particularly in Gaza and the West Bank, run counter to U.S. interests.

In a letter to congressional leadership and ranking committee members led by Sen. Chris Van Hollen of Maryland, the lawmakers argued that the 2027 National Defense Authorization Act, as currently written, would “further entrench concerning aspects of the U.S.-Israel defense and intelligence relationship at a time when the Israeli government’s actions are increasingly undermining U.S. interests and values.”

A section of the defense bill would require the secretary of defense to designate an “executive agent responsible for synchronizing cooperative efforts between the United States and Israel, including bilateral defense technology research, development, testing, evaluation, integration, and industrial cooperation.”

Such provisions “would constrain the Administration’s ability” to act independently and “threaten U.S. national security interests by handing Israel leverage over American weapons systems and military technology,” the democratic lawmakers warned, adding that the bill would also “create long-term dependencies by embedding Israeli technology into the U.S. defense industrial base that could make future policy changes costly or difficult to implement.”

The letter — which was signed by Democratic Sens. Elizabeth Warren of Massachusetts and Tammy Duckworth of Illinois and Independent Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont, among others — is the initiative of Van Hollen, who has emerged as one of Israel’s fiercest critics in Congress and recently called to “end the American taxpayer blank check to the government of Israel.”

His name has also been mentioned as a possible challenger to Schumer as Senate Majority Leader when the new Congress starts in early January.

The letter comes just over a week after President Donald Trump announced that the U.S. would halt billions of dollars in annual aid to Israel by the end of 2026, potentially ending decades of military funding for one of America’s closest allies in the Middle East.

The annual $3.8 billion sum is mostly spent in the U.S. to purchase weapon components or weapons systems manufactured in U.S. factories. U.S. Ambassador to Israel Mike Huckabee noted the spending  has created jobs in the United States. A memorandum of understanding between the two countries calls for that level of aid to continue through 2028.

However, some U.S. critics have dismissed Trump’s statement as a dodge, noting that while there is growing support for cutting defense aid to Israel, there has also been a push among some lawmakers to more tightly integrate the two countries’ defense establishments.

To do this “would be unwise, especially as the Government of Israel continues to pursue policies in Gaza, the West Bank and other parts of the region that are inconsistent with U.S. interests and values,” the Democratic senators warned on Tuesday, arguing that Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu had “openly stated that such an initiative was his idea.”

“The intention behind this is clear: to move U.S. security assistance governed through more traditional pathways, like Foreign Military Financing and arm sales, to more opaque, less discernible avenues through defense acquisitions and programs of record that reduce transparency, as well as increase Israel’s leverage over the United States and our dependency on Israeli technology,” according to the letter..

J Street, the liberal Jewish Middle East advocacy group, thanked Van Hollen for his letter in a post on X, writing that there should be “no deepening of our military relationship with Israel unless they comply with the Gaza peace agreement, end settler violence and reverse their de facto annexation of the West Bank.”

J Street earlier this week declared that the U.S. “needs a fundamental reset of its approach to the Middle East,” which would end offensive arms sales “until it is confirmed that Israel is no longer violating U.S. laws and values.”

This article originally appeared on JTA.org.

The post Democratic senators seek to remove US-Israel defense cooperation from spending bill appeared first on The Forward.

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Non-Jews who follow Jewish law gather in Israel for first international Noahide congress

(JTA) — Gilbert Meñoza spent decades as a Christian pastor in the Philippines before his study of the Hebrew Bible led him to reject the New Testament and embrace the Noahide faith.

Meñoza said most of his followers had embraced his rejection of Christianity, although a small contingent deserted him after he began declaring that the New Testament was false and that “we no longer believe that Yeshua was the Messiah,” he said, using the Hebrew name for Jesus.

Last week, he joined dozens of fellow Noahides from around the world in Israel, part of a movement of non-Jews who follow Jewish religious teachings without converting to Judaism.

The gathering, billed as the First International Congress of Noahides, was organized by Brit Olam, or Noahide World Center, a Jerusalem-based organization that claims thousands of followers in more than 70 countries. Many study online or belong to small local communities, often with limited contact with other Noahides.

The five-day visit by more than 60 delegates from 22 countries included tours of biblical sites in the West Bank, a meeting with President Isaac Herzog and, in a nod to Theodor Herzl’s First Zionist Congress, the signing of a founding scroll of their own.

Unlike converts to Judaism, Noahides retain their non-Jewish identities while accepting the Hebrew Bible as a source of religious and moral guidance. Also known as B’nai Noah, the name Noahide is derived from the biblical account of God’s covenant with Noah following the flood. In Jewish tradition, that covenant established seven universal obligations, including the creation of a justice system and bans on murder, theft, idolatry, blasphemy, sexual immorality and consuming flesh taken from a living animal.

Many, like Meñoza, come from Christian backgrounds, although others have arrived at their beliefs through independent religious study.

Meñoza began studying with rabbis online several years ago, eventually completing a three-year religious leadership course alongside more than 20 members of his community. He now reaches a wider audience through radio and television broadcasts.

The congress sought to bring those communities together under a formal global structure. At a ceremony attended by Jerusalem Mayor Moshe Lion, delegates signed a Scroll of the Noahide Covenant, a Hebrew declaration of their commitment to the people of Israel and the Torah. Organizers also established an international court of rabbis from Brit Olam offering religious guidance to Noahide communities worldwide, and said in a statement that the congress “carries the blessings of Israel’s chief rabbis.”

For centuries, the Seven Laws of Noah remained largely a matter of Jewish religious teaching rather than an organized effort to reach non-Jews. But Rabbi Oury Cherki, president of Brit Olam, believes Israel’s establishment spurred the delivery of those teachings to a wider international audience. Cherki hopes the Jerusalem congress will do for Noahides what Herzl’s 1897 gathering in Basel did for Zionism: transform a shared set of beliefs and aspirations into an organized international movement.

“Zionism achieved the material liberation of the Jewish people,” Cherki said, arguing that the next frontier must include building “a healthy connection with the outside world.”

Steven Lee Rachel, from Montreal, said he didn’t come from a “hardcore” Christian background and that his family and friends have been overwhelmingly supportive of his decision to become a Noahide.

“Becoming a Noahide has changed my everyday life for the better in almost every way, in terms of my spiritual life, my personal life, career as well, in terms of how I’ve been able to use that identity to build relationships in different industries,” he said.

Three years ago, Rachel married fellow Noahide Camila Henriquez in a ceremony in Montreal co-officiated by Rabbi Yisroel Bernath, director of the local Chabad, and Aleeza Ben Shalom, the matchmaker featured in Netflix’s Jewish Matchmaking.

Ben Shalom said she formed a “beautiful connection” with the bride after meeting her. Co-officiating the ceremony fulfilled a longstanding ambition she had been unable to pursue at Orthodox Jewish weddings, which are officiated by male rabbis.

“It was a dream come true,” she said.

The couple exchanged vows beneath a chuppah, or wedding canopy, pledging to build their home according to the Seven Laws of Noah. They also signed a marriage contract and broke a glass. Ben Shalom said the overwhelming majority of guests were not Jewish.

“It was truly a kiddush Hashem,” she said, using the Hebrew term for sanctifying God’s name.

Bernath described the ceremony as highly unusual, saying he was unaware of any precedent for a rabbi officiating at a Noahide wedding.

Eliezer Vicente Yarid, a Cuban who now lives in the United States, spent years helping others reconnect with their Jewish ancestry in a country where religious life had long been restricted, but ultimately chose not to convert to Judaism himself.

Yarid said he was 11 when his grandfather first told him their family descended from Bnei Anusim, Jews who had been forced to convert to Christianity during the Spanish and Portuguese Inquisitions.

“I didn’t understand what he was saying to me,” he said.

But by his mid-teens, his family had begun observing Jewish religious practices at home. In 2000, he and his parents established a Bnei Anusim community to help others reconnect with their Jewish heritage. Yarid initially sought to convert himself and later helped arrange visits by a rabbinical court to Cuba, where some community members underwent conversion.

But when an opportunity to convert arose after his move to the U.S., Yarid decided against it, saying he felt it was unfair to push his family into it.

He now follows the Seven Laws of Noah with his wife and son, while continuing to maintain ties with communities in Cuba, where he said he had also taught Noahide principles to people who had not converted.

The congress offered delegates practical guidance on building Noahide communities and strengthening their ties with Israeli rabbis.

“Israel is the focus of the world’s attention, for better or worse,” Rabbi Chaim Goldberg, chief executive of Brit Olam, said in a statement. “Noahides see the children of Israel, the people of the Bible, coming back to life in the modern age.”

Meñoza hopes to establish permanent institutions and overcome challenges facing Noahides back home in the Philippines. His community, for example, is raising money to purchase land for a cemetery because local burial procedures, he said, have made it difficult to avoid embalming, which conflicts with Torah practices.

“We want the Noahide community in every city where we work to have its own land, its own building, and its own fellowship center, with a beit midrash where they can learn together,” he said, using the Hebrew term for a religious study hall.

This article originally appeared on JTA.org.

The post Non-Jews who follow Jewish law gather in Israel for first international Noahide congress appeared first on The Forward.

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This year’s Hanukkah books serve up golems, holiday magic and dinosaurs

(JTA) — From a mischievous clay golem to a ring-tailed lemur who refuses to taste a latke, this year’s crop of Hanukkah books offers something to delight young readers of all ages.

The new titles range from lighthearted tales of family celebrations to the poignant, timely story of the Jews of Mariupol, Ukraine and the miraculous survival of the city’s menorah. Families across the diverse Jewish spectrum will find something to enjoy.

“Applesauce on Top”

Lina Schwarz; illustrated by Yuko Jones
PJ Library; ages 6 months–2

In this sweet rhyming board book, a little boy and his grandmother cook latkes and applesauce, counting apples and potatoes as they get ready to celebrate Hanukkah with their family. This new title from PJ Library will be distributed to 1-year-olds.

“I Will NOT Eat Latkes!”
Martha Seif Simpson; illustrated by Lisa Hunt
Apples & Honey Press; ages 4–6

In this lighthearted story, two animal pals celebrate Hanukkah together. Nosh, a koala, tries to persuade Potchky, a ring-tailed lemur, to taste a fried latke. Potchky, in a nod to Dr. Seuss’s “Green Eggs and Ham,” refuses, declaring that he only likes potato chips. As the story unfolds, kids hear the story of Hanukkah and the brave Maccabees. Finally, Potchky finds his courage and takes a bite — and loves the latkes.

“Hanukkah Night at the Construction Site” and “I Will NOT Eat Latkes!” (Apples & Honey Press)

“Charley and Seymour’s Hanukkah Miracle”

Melody Howard Ritt; illustrated by Nia Gould
Kar-Ben Publishing; ages 4–8

In this fun-filled Hanukkah tale, best friends Charley Chipmunk and Seymour Squirrel love their tradition of celebrating Hanukkah together. Seymour fries the latkes and asks Charley to bring the menorah and candles. But uh-oh: Charley remembers the menorah but forgets the candles. His backpack overflows with all kinds of things that begin with the letter “c,” even cantaloupe. But no candles. Seymour comes to the rescue, using the oil from frying latkes to kindle the menorah — just like in the Hanukkah story. This delightful book is now available in paperback through PJ Library.

“Hanukkah Night at the Construction Site”

Sherri Mandell; illustrated by Viviana Garofoli
Apples & Honey Press; ages 2–3

Toddlers who love trucks will be gleeful when the Hanukkah truck rolls into town in this latest addition to the popular Construction Site series. The entourage includes a large tractor carrying a large clay menorah, a mixer and excavator that serve latkes, chocolate coins, fried jelly doughnuts and gifts, and even a band. The back pages list all the types of trucks.

“Hear Me Roar! I’m a HANUKKAHsaur”

Naomi Gruer; illustrated by Mel Zohar
Kalaniot Books; ages 4–7

Miles is a young dinosaur enthusiast. On the first night of Hanukkah, his family doesn’t have the party Miles had hoped for, but he’s excited to put on his bright green dinosaur costume and roar as loudly as he can. Each night, Miles the dinosaur tries to help celebrate Hanukkah. When things go wrong and he makes a mess in the kitchen or drops things, his family encourages him to try again. On the last night, to his delight, his family throws a big Hanukkah party, with latkes, storytelling and sufganiyot, and all his friends. Zohar’s illustrations portray a diverse, multicultural celebration, including a child in a wheelchair.

“Mrs. Claus’s Noodle Kugel” and (Sky Pony Publishing; “Hear Me Roar! I’m a HANUKKAHsaur”)

“Harriet Hubbard and the Sold Out Hanukkah”

Bonnie Grubman; illustrated by Noa Kelner
Kar-Ben Publishing; ages 2–8

In this zany rhyming adventure, feisty Harriet sets out to her local market to buy all the fixings for a Hanukkah party. But all the shelves are bare — no potatoes for latkes, no chocolate gelt and no sufganiyot. She goes home disappointed but eager to set her table with some dates and raisins. To her surprise, her diverse group of friends arrives bearing everything needed for a festive Hanukkah party, including latkes and sweets. They sing and dance under the glow of the Hanukkah menorah.

“Mrs. Claus’s Noodle Kugel”

Janie Emaus; illustrated by Bryan Langdo
Sky Pony Publishing; ages 3–8

Interfaith families will welcome this addition to their family’s library. Two friends, Anna and Michael, get a letter from Mrs. Claus saying that Santa loved their latkes last Hanukkah and asking them to send the recipe. But the two sets of grandfathers have a different idea, each urging their grandkids to cook the other grandfather’s recipe — one for noodle kugel and one for Italian fettuccine noodles. The magical Mrs. Claus arrives on the scene, creating mayhem in the kitchen, with noodles flying out of the pot and Yiddish expressions sprinkled throughout. A team of elves gets things in order, and the sweet noodle kugel is a success. Kids will laugh out loud.

“Golem, Golem, Golem: Or How Hanukkah Was Saved”

Richard Ho; illustrated by Carmel Ben Ami
Roaring Brook Press; ages 3–6

A young boy turns his clay dreidel into a clay golem, the ancient Jewish mythical figure who acts as the Jews’protector when it isn’t getting into trouble. This boy’s golem causes more good-natured mischief, making a mess and eating all the Hanukkah treats. But trouble strikes when the golem accidentally breaks the family’s beautiful menorah. In a magical turn of events, the golem finds a way to make things right — and disappears. The family celebrates under the glow of their menorah. Lively illustrations depict a multicultural family.

“Golem, Golem, Golem: Or How Hanukkah Was Saved” and “Sharing the Light: A Hanukkah Story.” (Roaring Brook Press; Lovery)

“The Miracle Menorah of Mariupol”

Nancy Churnin; illustrated by Marissa Moss
Creston Books LLC; ages 7–11

In this true, poignant story set in modern-day Ukraine, we learn that for years the Jews of Mariupol gathered outdoors around the synagogue’s glistening golden menorah to retell the story of Hanukkah and the miracle of the oil. In the spring of 2022, to everyone’s horror, the beloved tradition came to an end with the Russian invasion. Andrei, a brave young boy, discovered that while the synagogue was destroyed in the bombing, the menorah had miraculously survived. Andrei cleaned the soot off the menorah and contacted the rabbi, who was in Israel for medical treatment. With the rabbi’s encouragement, Andrei gathered the city’s Jews who had not fled. Together, they lit the menorah, sang the blessings and found a deeper meaning in the Hanukkah miracle. At the book’s end, Rabbi Mendel Cohen recalls the tragic events and expresses gratitude for the young boy’s courage.

“Sharing the Light: A Hanukkah Story”

Jodie Sadowsky; photography by Alejandra Martinez
Lovery, Inc. ages 1 and up

Wren and her younger brother Rory discover ways to celebrate Hanukkah together, despite some light-hearted sibling rivalry. They cook a family recipe for latkes and enjoy a festive holiday.

This article originally appeared on JTA.org.

The post This year’s Hanukkah books serve up golems, holiday magic and dinosaurs appeared first on The Forward.

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