RSS
Yizkor: We Should Remember the Best Version of Our Loved Ones
In the Ashkenazi tradition, the Yizkor service stands out as an emotional highlight of each festival. On specially designated days, those who have lost parents, spouses, siblings, or children remain in the synagogue to recite memorial prayers, while those whose parents are still alive respectfully leave the sanctuary. The Hebrew word “Yizkor,” meaning “will remember,” initiates each prayer, emphasizing the enduring memory of those who have passed away and ensuring their remembrance even in their absence.
In the introduction to my latest book, Hearts & Minds on Jewish Festivals, I explore how deeply personal memories integrate into the observance of festivals. Reflecting on memories of shared experiences with my family throughout the Jewish calendar year over many years, I highlight the profound impact these memories have each time these festivals roll around again. Each treasured moment recalled enriches and profoundly enhances our celebrations:
These memories and so many more turn each festival and each significant Jewish date into a rich blend of history, tradition, Jewish laws and customs, memories, nostalgia, and new experiences. Every wine stain on the pages of the Haggadah we use, every forgotten High Holidays schedule tucked into the pages of the maḥzor, the special yomtov-connected drawings our kids made in preschool that reappear at the relevant time each year, the smell of yomtov food cooking in the kitchen—all these elements form a vivid mosaic of our Jewish experience, adding color, context, and depth to the practical aspects of the festivals and notable Jewish dates that punctuate our lives.
These reflections invite us to consider the dual nature of memory — with its inevitable mix of accuracy and embellishment — and the significant roles our remembered versions of events and experiences play in shaping our lives.
Psychology researcher and science communicator Dr. Julia Shaw, known for her exploration of memory and particularly false memories, addresses these themes in her book The Memory Illusion. She investigates how memories can be distorted, fabricated, and influenced by various factors.
Dr. Shaw explores the phenomenon of people recalling events that never happened, discussing the implications for fields like criminal law and our understanding of personal history. Interestingly, she suggests that these alterations in memory are not always detrimental; often, they serve to highlight the most favorable aspects of our loved ones and our past.
In eulogies, we often commemorate our loved ones in the most favorable light possible. The memories we recall are inherently selective and somewhat distorted, as they portray an idealized version of our departed loved ones — a version we all hope to be remembered by one day, when it is our turn to be eulogized.
When someone highlights less flattering aspects of a deceased person during a eulogy, it can shock the audience. I recall a funeral years ago for a university professor of mine, a celebrated scholar of history. His grandson’s eulogy began by acknowledging his grandfather’s reputation as a brilliant intellect and a fount of knowledge — then it shifted to a more personal note: “But there was more to him than that,” he added. “I will always remember him as the old man with dandruff on his jacket, who could be quite irritable and impatient. That was my grandpa.”
As he spoke, I couldn’t help but think, along with everyone else, “Is this really the memory to share at his funeral?”
The podcast Where There’s a Will, There’s a Wake, hosted by English actress Kathy Burke, is premised on a novel concept: “If you could plan your perfect death, what would you do?”
Each episode features celebrities who are asked to imagine their own untimely demise, take charge of their hypothetical funeral arrangements, choose their preferred way to go, create playlists, and even listen to eulogies prepared in advance by their friends.
While intriguing, this concept starkly contrasts with reality — where the memory of who we are is shaped by others, typically our family members, who preserve and interpret our legacies. Nevertheless, these curated memories, richly assembled from diverse perspectives, still do not capture the complete truth. Despite varied viewpoints, no two people will ever remember someone in exactly the same way.
During our festive gatherings over Yom Tov, we often find ourselves immersed in family stories, both old and new. As we enjoy each other’s company and celebrate together, these time-honed tales are shared and reshaped with each retelling. Over the years, details are embellished, and characters grow larger than life, creating increasingly engaging narratives.
This process not only entertains but also strengthens family bonds, imparts values, and fosters a sense of continuity and belonging. Enriched memories become an important part of our collective family heritage, celebrated during these special occasions.
The Yizkor service utilizes the power of memory to connect us with those who have passed on. We engage deeply with our memories, idealizing and appreciating the positive aspects while overlooking the flaws. This idealization is not without merit, as highlighted by a remarkable passage from the Talmud.
The Talmud (Sanhedrin 92b) unpacks Ezekiel’s seminal “dry bones” prophecy. According to the biblical narrative (Ez. 37:1-14), Ezekiel is brought to a valley filled with dry, lifeless bones and asked by God if these bones can live again. He responds that only God knows, prompting God to command Ezekiel to prophesy over the bones. Miraculously, as Ezekiel prophesies, the bones reassemble, grow flesh, and are infused with life, becoming a vast army.
This vision is interpreted in the Talmud as symbolizing the Israelites from the tribe of Ephraim who, driven by impatience, had tried to conquer the land of Israel prematurely at the dawn of Jewish history. Their failure and demise are represented by the dry bones, which are then miraculously revived by Ezekiel.
The question is: Did this event actually happen, or is Ezekiel’s vision merely symbolic? Rabbi Yehuda and Rabbi Nehemiah view the entire episode as a metaphor, suggesting it never actually occurred. Then, unexpectedly, Rabbi Eleazar, son of Rabbi Yosi HaGelili, asserts that the narrative is true, and that the revived bones went on to marry and have children.
This claim is further complicated by Rabbi Yehuda ben Beteira, who claims to be descended from those supposedly metaphorical figures, and adds that “these are the tefillin that my grandfather bequeathed to me from them.”
The thirteenth-century rabbinic luminary, Rabbi Shlomo ben Aderet (Rashba), clarifies this debate by suggesting that some aggadic passages are significant not necessarily because they occurred, but because they represent events that could have transpired. This idea means these stories transcend mere metaphor. They are potential narratives that impart lessons and carry deep messages, regardless of their historical authenticity.
In the specific case of Rabbi Yehuda ben Beteira claiming to have inherited tefillin from descendants of those revived by Ezekiel, the Rashba seemingly interprets this not as a literal historical claim but as a narrative device intended to convey deeper truths or lessons about faith, continuity, and the transmission of tradition. The focus is on the value and impact of the story rather than its factual accuracy.
This approach to memory and narrative is crucial, especially in prayers like the Yizkor service, where we remember our deceased loved ones in the best possible light. It’s not about facts, or about history — but about values and heritage.
By remembering our loved ones as the best versions of themselves — whether these memories are entirely accurate or somewhat enhanced — we not only honor their legacy but also inspire ourselves to aspire to these ideals. This process elevates the souls of the departed and enriches our own lives, demonstrating the power of memory to shape not only our perception of the past, but also our actions in the present and our aspirations for the future.
The author is a rabbi in Beverly Hills, California.
The post Yizkor: We Should Remember the Best Version of Our Loved Ones first appeared on Algemeiner.com.
RSS
Jewish LGBTQ+ Group Reinvited to Join Montreal Pride Parade After Initial Exclusion Due to Israel War
The 2023 Pride Parade in Montreal. Photo: Francois Nadeau / Hans Lucas via Reuters Connect
Organizers of Montreal’s 2025 Pride Parade reversed their decision to exclude two Jewish groups from the event on Sunday and apologized for banning their participation after receiving widespread condemnation.
In a statement on Tuesday, organizers expressed remorse “to the Jewish communities and specially to Jewish members of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community,” for excluding them from the parade, which marks the conclusion of The Fierté Montréal Festival that started on July 31.
“Fierté Montréal has always stood firmly against all forms of violence inflicted on marginalized populations or groups, including antisemitism, and remains committed to doing so,” said Marlot Marleau, president of the Fierté Montréal Festival. “As 2SLGBTQIA+ rights continue to erode around the world, we have a responsibility to provide an inclusive and safe gathering space for all participants, regardless of their religious or cultural background. This is a commitment we will continue to uphold in collaboration with all organizations taking part in our events.”
Ga’ava (which in Hebrew means “pride”) is Canada’s oldest and largest Jewish LGBTQ+ group. It participated in the Montreal Pride Parade last year. Ga’ava and its partner organization, the Center for Israel and Jewish Affairs (CIJA), said they were informed on July 31 that they were banned from attending the parade on Sunday.
Explaining the decision, but without mentioning the name of either group, festival organizers said they received complaints about statements made by the organizations that were perceived as “hateful.”
“To ensure that the Fierté Montréal Festival remains a safe and celebratory space for everyone, the Board of Directors of Fierté Montréal has made the decision to deny participation in the Pride Parade to organizations spreading hateful discourse,” they explained. “This measure is taken in the context of a complex geopolitical situation and stems from our commitment to preserving the emotional and physical safety of our communities. We refuse to allow the spaces of the Fierté Montréal to be instrumentalized in the context of a conflict that involves major violations of fundamental human rights.”
In the same statement, festival organizers condemned what they claimed is “genocide” taking place in the Gaza Strip. They also expressed solidarity with the Palestinian people “and their opposition to genocide.”
Ga’ava said Montreal Pride representatives received anonymous complaints by people who accused the Jewish group of making hateful comments during an interview about attempts to exclude pro-Israel groups from the annual pride parade. Ga’ava said “the terms ‘pro-terror’ or ‘pro-Hamas,’ which [Ga’ava] are accused of using, may offend those who have supported or celebrated terrorism, but they do not constitute hate speech.”
Carlos A. Godoy L., who has been the volunteer president of Ga’ava for a decade, said the “deeply discriminatory” decision to initially exclude them from the parade was based on “flimsy, politically motivated reasons decided behind closed doors under pressure from groups that hate Jews, deny Israel’s existence, and whose members celebrated the atrocities of Oct. 7, 2023.”
Eta Yudin, Quebec’s CIJA vice president, said, “Instead of standing together against hate, antisemitism, and homophobia, Montreal Pride has chosen to align with those who fuel hatred, seek to divide our society, and attack the shared Quebec values with this antisemitic decision.”
The parade’s ban against the Jewish groups resulted in resignations of a festival committee member – who called the decision “discriminatory and indefensible” — and its chairman of the board. An executive director of the festival took leave because of the decision, according to The Canadian Jewish News. The decision was additionally condemned by several Canadian politicians, including a group which penned a letter to festival organizers about the “unacceptable” move.
Elisabeth Prass, the Quebec Liberal Party’s only Jewish parliamentarian, said, “No discrimination of any kind should take place during an event meant to promote diversity and inclusion. Antisemitism has no place in the face of acceptance of Jewish members of the LGBTQ+ community.” Quebec’s Minister of International Relations Martine Biron called the move ” counterproductive to the mission of inclusion of Montreal Pride.”
On Tuesday, Fierté Montréal Festival organizers acknowledged that their actions were “perceived by the Jewish community in Québec (and especially by Jewish members of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community) as a way to exclude them from its events.”
“This does not reflect the inclusive values that guide Fierté Montréal’s actions,” they added. “The organization is committed to improving its internal complaint management processes to ensure that a situation like this one does not happen again and that no communities feel left out from its future festivities. The organization has reached out to representatives of the Jewish community, including CIJA, to clarify the situation and to ensure a space that is inclusive and safe for everyone, especially for Jewish members of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community who wish to take part in the Parade. These discussions have helped clarify each party’s stance and reaffirm a shared commitment to Fierté Montréal’s values of inclusion and respect.”
Festival organizers changed their decision about one month after the research division of the Combat Antisemitism Movement released a report detailing incidents of hate against Jews which took place in June during demonstrations in celebration of LGBTQ+ rights and identity.
Also in June, the nonprofit A Wider Bridge outlined in its own report how anti-Israel activists in the LGBTQ+ community are subjecting Zionist Jews to extreme levels of discrimination, including expulsions from major progressive groups and even physical assault.
RSS
UK Police Arrest Two Men for Spraying Jewish People With Water in Viral Online Video
Two men sprayed water guns at Jewish pedestrians in a viral video taken in the UK. Photo: Screenshot
Authorities arrested two men in the United Kingdom on Thursday for squirting specifically Jewish pedestrians with water guns, as seen in a video that has gone viral on social media, Greater Manchester Police (GMP) said.
The men, ages 26 and 36, were arrested in Farnworth, Bolton, and remain in custody for questioning on suspicion of racially aggravated common assault, police added. Authorities have also seized a vehicle and water pistol suspected to have been used in the incident.
“We are treating this incident with the utmost seriousness and have acted swiftly to make arrests,” said Chief Inspector Simon Ashcroft, of GMP’s Salford district. He noted that GMP has a “zero-tolerance approach to hate crime in any form,” and police are “committed to ensuring our communities feel safe and supported.”
“We continue to work closely with our partners to provide reassurance and encourage anyone affected to come forward,” he added. “We are also aware from other footage that there may be further victims, and we urge anyone who believes they have been targeted to contact GMP or the Community Security Trust (CST).” Police encourage anyone with information about the incident to contact authorities or file a report online.
The viral video – which was shared earlier this month on social media and has since been deleted — showed two men in a vehicle in Greater Manchester laughing and smiling as they sprayed water at Orthodox Jewish pedestrians, including children. The two men targeted Jewish people as the traditional Jewish song “Hava Nagila” played in the background.
The video was posted on social media by a Polish rap group called KONSP1RA, whose members include a YouTuber and UK resident named Kamil Galanty and his friend Mati. Both men are featured in the water gun prank video. KONSP1RA has posted similar water prank videos on social media, but the most recent was the first to specifically target only Jewish people. However, the group has targeted Jews in other prank videos, including one filmed in an airport and another in a supermarket.
CST, the UK’s Jewish security organization, condemned the “appalling antisemitic video” on Wednesday. The British charity Campaign Against Antisemitism said the pranksters behaved “like playground bullies” by harassing Jewish people and added that the incident “is not a prank but antisemitic abuse, and doing so from the comfort of your car is particularly cowardly.”
In response to backlash over the clip, KONSP1RA insisted in a statement on social media that they are not antisemitic. They claimed they “respect all races, all religions, and all people.”
“We strongly reject any form of hate, racism, or discrimination,” they wrote. “Our channel is based entirely on humor, entertainment, and light-hearted pranks. Our goal is to make people laugh – never to hurt or offend … If anyone interpreted our video in a harmful or offensive way – we are truly sorry. That was never our intention.”
KONSP1RA said they are being “wrongfully attacked” and labeled antisemitic — “something that does not represent us or our content in any way.” They said accusations made against the group are “extremely hurtful and unfair.”
“Let’s not spread hate where there was never any intention of it,” they stated in conclusion. “Peace and respect to all.”
Photo: Facebook
This week’s arrests came one day after CST published a new report detailing antisemitic incidents recorded during the first half of this year. CST recorded 1,521 antisemitic incidents in the UK from January to June, marking the second-highest total of incidents ever recorded by the nonprofit security group in the first six months of any year.
This year’s total was only surpassed by the first half of 2024, in which 2,019 antisemitic incidents were recorded in the aftermath of the Hamas-led Oct. 7, 2023, terror attack on Israel.
RSS
Azerbaijan and Armenia to Sign Peace Deal, White House Says
Residents in vehicles attempt to leave the city of Stepanakert following a military operation conducted by Azerbaijani armed forces in Nagorno-Karabakh, a region inhabited by ethnic Armenians, Sept. 24, 2023. Photo: REUTERS/David Ghahramanyan
Azerbaijan and Armenia will sign an initial US-brokered peace agreement during a meeting with US President Donald Trump on Friday, a deal aimed at boosting economic ties between the two countries after decades of conflict, the White House said.
White House spokeswoman Anna Kelly told reporters that Trump would sign separate deals with both Armenia and Azerbaijan on energy, technology, economic cooperation, border security, infrastructure, and trade. No further details were provided.
Trump will meet separately with Azerbaijani President Ilham Aliyev and Armenian Prime Minister Nikol Pashinyan at the White House, beginning at 2:30 pm (1830 GMT), with a trilateral meeting set for 4:15 pm (2015 GMT), the White House said.
The agreement includes exclusive US development rights to a strategic transit corridor through the South Caucasus, dubbed the “Trump Route for International Peace and Prosperity.”
US officials said the agreement was hammered out during repeated visits to the region and would provide a basis for working toward a full normalization between the countries.
Neither the joint declaration due to be signed nor the separate bilateral agreements with the US were released.
It was not immediately clear how the deal being signed on Friday would address thorny issues such as the demarcation of shared borders and Baku’s demand for a change in Yerevan’s constitution, which includes a reference to a 1989 call for the reunification of Armenia and Nagorno-Karabakh, then an autonomous region within Soviet Azerbaijan.
Officials briefing reporters skirted over the Nagorno-Karabakh issue.
Armenia and Azerbaijan have been at odds since the late 1980s when Nagorno-Karabakh – a mountainous Azerbaijani region that had a mostly ethnic Armenian population – broke away from Azerbaijan with support from Armenia.
Both Armenia and Azerbaijan won independence from the Soviet Union in 1991. Azerbaijan took back full control of Nagorno-Karabakh in 2023 in a military offensive, prompting almost all of the territory’s remaining 100,000 Armenians to flee to Armenia.
US officials highlighted the opportunities presented for both countries and US investors through creation of the new transit corridor, which will allow greater exports of energy and other resources.
“What’s going to happen here with the Trump route is, this isn’t charity. This is a highly investable entity,” said one senior administration official, adding that at least nine companies had in recent days expressed interest in operating the transit corridor, including three US firms.
‘SAFER AND MORE PROSPEROUS’
Under a carefully negotiated section of the documents the leaders will sign on Friday, Armenia plans to award the US exclusive special development rights for an extended period on a transit corridor that will be named the Trump Route for International Peace and Prosperity, and known by the acronym TRIPP, the officials told Reuters this week.
Trump would sign a directive to set up a negotiating team to work out details for how to operate the corridor, with initial commercial negotiations to begin next week, one of the officials said.
“The losers here are China, Russia, and Iran. The winners here are the West,” one of the officials said. “Both countries that have been in conflict for 35 years … are looking and talking about full peace with each other tomorrow.”
“It’s being done, not through force, but through commercial partnership … with these two countries,” the official said. “The joint declaration that we’re going to see signed today is the first-ever peace declaration signed bilaterally by the two countries since the end of the Cold War.”
Trump has tried to present himself as a global peacemaker in the first months of his second term. The White House credits him with brokering a ceasefire between Cambodia and Thailand and sealing peace deals between Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo, and Pakistan and India. He also is intensifying efforts to end Russia’s war in Ukraine, eyeing a possible meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin as early as next week.
Senior administration officials told reporters the agreement between Armenia and Azerbaijan marked the first end to several frozen conflicts on Russia’s periphery since the end of the Cold War and said it would send a powerful signal to the entire region.
“This isn’t just about Armenia. It’s not just about Azerbaijan. It’s about the entire region, and they know that that region is going to be safer and more prosperous with President Trump,” a senior administration official said.
A peace deal could transform the South Caucasus, an energy-producing region neighboring Russia, Europe, Turkey, and Iran that is crisscrossed by oil and gas pipelines but riven by closed borders and longstanding ethnic conflicts.