“As soon as you settle in America, gather your children, and go to Israel. Then, once you see that land, I want a letter from each of you, telling me in detail how it is over there.”

Those were the words of my grandfather, Misha, the family’s great patriarch, who was born in a tiny shtetl near Vitebsk in 1902 into the family of a rabbi.

He grew up to become an important surgeon, fought in three wars, had most of his immediate family murdered by the Nazis, survived Soviet antisemitism, and finally outlived his wife and all his children, including my father.

My grandfather was a Jew by faith, by race, and by identity. He was a true Zionist who believed that Jewish destiny was not just in its religion, but also in its absolute right to be able to determine its own independent future. For him, as an unbreakable Soviet Jew, betrayed by his country’s promises about egalitarianism and equality, bruised by the most humiliating acts of antisemitism, he believed in the State of Israel, the only place in the world that would not compromise a Jewish life.

My grandfather carried that Zionist flame within him for the rest of his life, but never got to see his promised land. Years and years later, I traveled there on his behalf, but I fell in love with it all on my own.

Jews in Israel learned not to compromise. They defended their state, so their land would never be taken, and their children would never be without a home. Israel knew how to listen to its own voice — until 2011, when Gilad Shalit, held captive by Hamas for 1,934 days, was exchanged for 1,027 Palestinian and Arab-Israeli prisoners. Of these, 280 were sentenced to life in prison.

Among them was Yahya Sinwar, serving four life sentences, who masterminded the October 7, 2023, attack.

As of late, while in the midst of its existential crisis, Israel is trying in vain to seek the world’s understanding and respect. It mistakenly believes it can achieve both. The world does not want to understand Israel, nor the Jewish plight within the context of Israel.

In 1976, Palestinian and German terrorists hijacked an Air France plane with Israeli passengers, diverting it to Entebbe, Uganda. Demanding prisoner releases, they threatened to kill hostages. Israel launched a daring rescue mission, freeing nearly all hostages but losing three in the process, including mission leader Yoni Netanyahu. The most heated debate took place before the actual resolution of this operation between then Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin, who strongly believed in the deal in the absence of the military option, and Shimon Peres.

He later shared with his speechwriter Yehuda Avner : “When it comes to negotiating with terrorists, I long ago made a decision of principle, well before I became prime minister, that if a situation were ever to arise when terrorists would be holding our people hostage on foreign soil and we were faced with an ultimatum either to free killers in our custody or let our own people be killed, I would, in the absence of a military option, give in to the terrorists. I would free killers to save our people.”

Shimon Perez, on the other hand, who at the time was Israel’s Defense Minister, held a different view. To him “deal” meant giving in to hijackers for the first time in Israel’s history. Although we all know Perez as the ambassador of peace, during that crisis he strongly believed that negotiation with terrorists was off limits because it was not part of Israel’s make up.

He said: “If we give in to the hijackers’ demand and release terrorists, everyone will understand us but no one will respect us. If, on the other hand, we conduct a military operation to free the hostages, it is possible that no one will understand us, but everyone will respect us, depending of course on the outcome of the operation.”

Israel under Rabin was on the verge of negotiations, but once the IDF presented the military plan, the decision to proceed was made, despite the risk of casualties. Thus, another chapter in Israel’s history of rescue missions was written. This demonstrated to both its enemies and the unfriendly international community that Israel would not compromise its national integrity to gain society’s understanding and insincere sympathy.

Why does Israel’s usually unbreakable spirit seem so influenced by actors with, at best, marginal interest in it? This may sound naive, as Israel needs major players like the US. However, that shouldn’t justify pushing Israel into bad deals.

The October 7, 2023, attack presented Israel with its most devastating hostage crisis. As of February 10, 2025, eighty of the 251 hostages abducted by Hamas remain in Gaza, with at least a third believed dead. Hasn’t Israel been here before? How could this deal be made after such a tragedy and most complex military operation, which drastically diminished Hamas?

There is intelligence that Hamas is regrouping; this cancer will grow. If Israel retreats after receiving hostages, some in body bags, it has every reason to anticipate a repeat of October 7th. Mothers embracing their children today may tomorrow be replaced by other mothers agonizing over their children’s fate all over again. The job of a parent is to shield their child from danger for as long as they can, but the job of a government, in this case the Israeli government, especially its leadership, is to protect the entire nation from all foreseeable danger, so that “Never Again” is Never Again FOREVER.

Throughout my life, first under the hypocritical iron fist of the Soviet empire and later as an immigrant in America, where some of the most important values and traditions of America’s greatness are too frequently compromised, I have always admired Israel, a nation salvaged from near extinction. I have revered Israel for its unwavering commitment to its core mission since its founding as a sovereign nation: the defense of its land and its people. For at least 63 years, it never faltered in this.

After the first three women were released this year, I heard: “Why not celebrate with them? They feared this day wouldn’t come. Celebrate with those young women!” or “Happy now? You got your deal, your hostages. Move on, stop this bloodshed.”

Frankly, it doesn’t concern me that non-Jews refuse to see this deal’s weakness; it saddens me that my people neglect how harmful it is for Israel and Jews.

As a human and mother, I want every hostage home, no matter the price. Seeing mothers with daughters breaks my heart with happiness, heartbreak, and disappointment. As a Jew, mother, and Zionist, these people are in hell because of deals like this, like 2011’s, which led to October 7th. Today’s rushed deal anticipates similar tragedies, different mothers lamenting, children orphaned. A new government will seek a new solution.

An understanding world is a luxury Jews and Israel cannot afford. To survive, Israel must fight.

The world will never understand or forgive a nation which, after losing 6 million to genocide, created its own state from the ashes and became a maverick of modern civilization. Had Jews and their promised land been losers, surrounded by enemies, swallowed by neighboring states, and become Israelis with a victimhood mentality, the world might have forgiven their roughness. But Israel’s story is different. The past 77 years, however difficult, have been a victory for Israel and every Jew there. Strong, courageous victors fighting for their people, knowing they are all potential hostages, these Israelis will never be sympathized with. All that remains is respect, existing without love or understanding, founded on reason. It would be impossible not to respect Israel’s refusal of weak deals — its only duty being to protect its country from future tragedies.

Anya Gillinson is an immigration lawyer and author of the new memoir Dreaming in Russian. She lives in New York City. More at www.anyagillinson.com. 

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