Features
The late Rabbi Zalman Schachter’s time in Winnipeg recalled at lively evening hosted by Jewish Heritage Centre
(This article originally appeared in the Dec. 21, 2016 issue of The Jewish Post & News) By BERNIE BELLAN
It was billed as an evening that would be devoted to “Rabbi Zalman Schachter and the Winnipeg origins of the Jewish Renewal Movement”.
Like just about everything else associated with the late Rabbi Schachter (who died in 2014 at the age of 90), it was an evening not without controversy.
The Jewish Heritage Centre promoted the program, which was held Monday, Dec. 12, in the Multipurpose Room of the Asper Campus, as part of “its synagogue series connected with the Synagogues Exhibit at the Asper Campus.”
With the ever-clever Prof. Dan Stone serving as host, the audience of over 100 was treated to a series of reminiscences about Rabbi Schachter’s 19 years spent in Winnipeg (from 1956-75) – a time that paralleled the advent of the “New Age” movement, also a time during which the use of hallucinogenic drugs became highly popular among young people.
The evening featured three main speakers: Rabbi Alan Green, who was given his “smichah” by Rabbi Schachter; Prof. Justin Jaron Lewis, an expert on Hasidism and the organizer of an interview project centering around Rabbi Schachter’s time in Winnipeg; and Alexandra Granke, a graduate student at the University of Manitoba in the Department of Religion, whose Masters thesis dealt with the influence Winnipeg’s Jewish community had on Rabbi Schachter’s thinking.
There was also a contribution from Murray (Moish) Goldenberg, who was a protégé of Rabbi Schachter’s. Goldenberg read a poem devoted to the late rabbi’s memory.
Following the speakers’ presentations, Dan Stone invited anyone in the audience who wanted to tell of their own experience with Rabbi Schachter to speak up. One by one individuals told stories about how Rabbi Schachter touched their lives.
Lest anyone reading this think that the evening was nothing more than a love-in for Rabbi Schachter, however, there were some negative notes struck as well. Although he was undoubtedly a man of great charisma, Zalman Schachter had his detractors. Two themes mentioned several times, both by the featured speakers and audience members, coursed through recollections of his time spent in Winnipeg: his faithlessness when it came to his relationships with women, and his overt championing of drug use.
Following is an account of some of what was said:
Rabbi Green who, Dan Stone told the audience, will be leaving Winnipeg in 2018 to move to Fairfield, Iowa – the centre of transcendental meditation, described first meeting Rabbi Schachter in Los Angeles in the 1970s.
In time, Green became a devout follower of Rabbi Schachter’s, culminating in his receiving his smichah from Rabbi Schachter in Philadelphia, where he found the rabbi “surrounded by a bunch of old hippies” – some of whom “were leaders of the New Left in the 1960s.”
“My first class with him,” Rabbi Green said, “was kind of a Sinai movement for me. It literally took my breath away.”
Rabbi Schachter had a multitude of interests, including “Jewish mysticism, humanism, and modern psychology” among others, noted Rabbi Green. As well, “he was fluent in many languages.”
What impressed Rabbi Green quite deeply, he said, was how Rabbi Schachter “brought together Judaism and Indian mysticism”.
“How often we let fear get in the way of Jewish mysticism,” Rabbi Green said Rabbi Schachter once told him.
Turning to the subject of the Jewish Renewal Movement and Rabbi Schachter’s central role in that movement, Rabbi Green observed that “there are now hundreds of Jewish Renewal rabbis – most of them ordained by Rabbi Schachter.”
It was in Winnipeg, Rabbi Green noted, that Rabbi Schachter “created the first rainbow talit”. It was also here that “the interface between psychedelic drugs and spiritual practice” first took root among Rabbi Schachter and his many followers.
Rabbi Green commented, however, “that I always found this phase of Rabbi Schachter’s life to be somewhat embarrassing”.
Following Rabbi Green’s presentation, Justin Jaron Lewis took the podium to offer some observations about Rabbi Schachter’s time in Winnipeg. Lewis noted that Rabbi Schachter’s own autobiography has relatively little to say about the time he spent here, even though it was a fairly lengthy period. As well, the Wikipedia article about the rabbi barely mentions his time spent in Winnipeg, Lewis also observed.
It was partly because of that vacuum, Lewis explained that, at the behest of his colleague in the Judaic Studies program at the University of Manitoba, Ben Baader, Lewis embarked upon the creation of an oral history project devoted to gathering “memories of Rabbi Schachter during his Winnipeg years.”
With contributions from 28 different individuals, all of whom whose lives were touched by Rabbi Schachter at some point during his time spent in Winnipeg – as the director of Hillel, as the representative of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, as a Professor of Religion, and in the many other roles he played, interviews were gathered. Those interviews now reside in a collection put together at the University of Colorado in Boulder (where Rabbi Schachter spent the final years of his life).
(If you would like to listen to any of those interviews simply Google “Winnipeg Jewish renewal”. According to Lewis, however, some of those interviews are not entirely positive in the impressions some interviewees had of Rabbi Schachter.)
The fact that Winnipeg seems to have been almost deliberately obscured in any writing, either by Rabbi Schachter himself or others writing about him, is somewhat of a puzzle for Lewis. After all, he observed, it was here that Rabbi Schachter “began the chaotic and colourful phase of Judaism that became so important in his later years.”
Perhaps it was the shroud of controversy that surrounded him while he was here that led to Rabbi Schachter’s downplaying the time he spent here but, as Lewis suggested, “over time the world has forgiven him even though he left Winnipeg under a cloud”.
It was left to Alexandra Granke to fill in some of the blanks that others have found when it comes to knowing more about the time Rabbi Schacter spent here.
As Granke explained, she was “the first person to have listened to all 28 interviews about Rabbi Schachter” that Winnipeggers gave. (By the way, if you have something you’d like to tell about Rabbi Schachter, you can still get in touch with Justin Jaron Lewis, who said he would love to hear from anyone else who might have something to contribute to the oral history project. He can be reached at Justin_Lewis@umanitoba.ca .)
In analyzing Rabbi Schachter’s often controversial stay in Winnipeg, Granke observed that “there was an air of inevitability about Rabbi Schachter’s break with the Lubavitch movement.”
Granke referred to an interview given by Abe Anhang, who talked about Rabbi Schachter’s use of LSD as the reason for his departure from the Chabad movement.
“His use of LSD runs through many of the other interviews,” Granke noted. Yet, she was “surprised by the relative nonchalance of many of the interviewees” toward Rabbi Schachter’s prolific drug use.
In fact, one interviewee mentioned how she was first introduced to “weed, mescaline, and cocaine” by Rabbi Schachter.
Rather than simply dwell on this aspect of Rabbi Schachter’s life though, Granke observed that many interviewees spoke of how he “opened up his group of followers to a different understanding of Judaism.”
“Doing drugs for him was not something fun,’ Granke noted. Rather, “for him it was about a way to reach a higher level of spirituality.”
Turning to yet another oft-criticized component of his life, Granke did refer to Rabbi Schachter’s having “fathered ten children with a variety of women.”
Yet, despite his somewhat notorious reputation, Granke suggested that others “were willing to overlook his lapses in moral judgment because he was so accepting of others.”
Although Reb Zalman, as he came to be known affectionately by his devoted followers, may have “been the opposite of what was expected of rabbis in Winnipeg,” his “dedication to people” is what seems to have been the mark that he left most often upon others.
“Reb Zalman always had time for others,” was a common refrain through the interviews, Granke said.
As one interviewee suggested, Rabbi Schachter’s form of spirituality, which he formulated while he was in Winnipeg, was “Buddhist chakra meeting Jewish sphirot”.
“He was a Jewish practitioner in a universal soul,” said one interviewee.
Granke referred to the interview given by Len Udow, who suggested that the pain of Rabbi Schachter’s wartime experience (when he fled first from Vichy France, then to Belgium, where he was “one step ahead of the Gestapo”) dissipated during moments in which he was engaged in prayer. “It was as if all the pain of the war was dispelled by the sudden connection with his many ancestors.”
Murray Goldenberg mentioned Rabbi Schachter’s having taught him the blessing for marijuana: “shehakol neheyeh b’dvaro” (who brings about everything by his word).
Yet, as I noted earlier, not everyone was so rosy-hued in their memories of Rabbi Schachter. David Wilder suggested that “the reason he (Rabbi Schachter) doesn’t mention Winnipeg in his writings is because of his situation with his family. His kids didn’t speak to him,” Wilder said (because of their father’s having left their mother to take up with the daughter of a well-known Winnipeg radio announcer).
Justin Jaron Lewis did say though, that “the kids reconciled with him at the end.”
As audience members after audience member spoke up to recall their own experience of Rabbi Schachter, it was easy to understand the enormous impact that this man had on so many Winnipeggers. As Jerry Cohen said, “There was no greater influence on my life Jewishly than Reb Zalman. He was a great influence to many of us in those early years in Winnipeg.”
#1 Mr. — Ernest Seinfeld 2017-07-09 11:15
This is the first time I am reading about this rabbi. I also read an article about him today in the Jerusalem Post and made the following comment:
“I remember Rabbi Schaechter as a fellow student in Vienna at the Sperlgymnasium (high school, the same Sigmund Freud atttended) in 1937.
In Austria classes in one’s religion were mandatory.
He kept trying to upstage our religion teacher by frequent interrupting him with “Raschi said”.
The rest of the students who had no idea of the teaching of Raschi and hardly were even aware of this great Talmud scholar, after a while gave him the nickname ‘Raschi’. The teacher obviously did not enjoy these interruptions but remained quiet and polite.
Ernest Seinfeld
es893columbia.edu”
I attended three years with him in the same classes. He sat always in the first row and tried to ‘shine’. He craved for attention, a trait his fellow students did not exactly find appealing.
In our January 18, 2017 issue we also printed this letter from members of Rabbi Schachter’s family, in response to the original article:
Response to article on Reb Zalman Schachter
We are the widow and children of Reb Zalman Schachhter-Shalomi, z”l. We want to recognize the initiative of the Jewish Heritage Center in convening a public forum honoring our father and Winnipeg origins of the Jewish Renewal Movement. While none of us live in Winnipeg any longer, we treasure the time that the family had in Winnipeg and are sorry that we were unable to be present for this forum. Had we been present, we would have contributed to this retrospective in the following ways.
- The article “The late Rabbi Zalman Schachter’s Time in Winnipeg Recalled at Lively Evening Hosted by Jewish Heritage Centre” misstated the tone of his family situation. Our father was wholehearted in his relationship with his wives and children. His marriage breakdowns were certainly not caused by lapses in moral judgment. Divorce almost always is difficult for the marital partners and children. In the case of Reb Zalman and Feigle, the decision to end their marriage was understandable as, much earlier, they recognized that their relationship was unsustainable. They had drifted apart as a result of the differences in their spiritual visions and only intentionally stayed together until their youngest child reached her Bat Mitzvah so that she would have the capacity to deal with family breakdown. None of the children harbor any resentment to children from other mothers. It is a testament to Reb Zalman’s love for his children, and our love for him, the that we are all in touch with one another to share each other’s joy and provide support in times of need.
- There is an element of physical harshness in the name Schachter, which has its origins in Shochet (slaughterer). Reb Zalman was someone who was deeply concerned with the increase in violent conflict in the world. He adopted a typical Jewish response to his concerns by adding a name that would bring to our consciousness the need to pursue peace, Shalom. For many years now, he has been known and called Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi.
- The relatively limited material in the University of Colorado archives on Jewish Renewal on Reb Zalman’s time in Winnipeg is not based in any way on any deliberate action on his part or because of an alleged cloud causing him to leave the city. Reb Zalman moved to Philadelphia because it had a larger Jewish community and was closer to other large Jewish centers in North America. Reb Zalman had begun providing rabbinic training in Winnipeg, but few students were willing to come to Winnipeg to study. The move to the east coast enabled many more students to access his training and become rabbis. As for the gap in current literature concerning Reb Zalman’s time in Winnipeg, we applaud Professor Lewis’s initiative in collecting oral histories to be added to the archive at the University of Colorado. Regarding the claim that Reb Zalman ignored Winnipeg in his autobiography, it should be noted that 97 pages of the 186 page “My life in Jewish Renewal,” (aside from the Appendices), are devoted to years living in Winnipeg. It is crucial to note, however, that much that happened during this period took place during his numerous travels outside Winnipeg.
We are aware that some of his views and activities were challenged by some elements of the Winnipeg Jewish community. Reb Zalman, as we all are, was human. However, for those who focused their comments at the forum on his imperfections, we wonder what standard they were holding him to. On the first Shabbat of the secular year We read Parshat Va’yigash. The story of our ancestor Ya’acov is drawing to a close. Yes, Ya’acov had issues with his wives, with his children, and with neighbors in the broader community. Those flaws, however, are not the major part of his remembrance. We remember him as a Jewish ancestor whose legacy was that all Jews now are known under Ya’acov’s second name, Yisrae. We are all B’nai Yisrael.
We, his widow, his daughters and sons, his grandchildren and great-grandchildren, all feel that we have been blessed by being the spouse and offspring of one of the 21 century’s greatest rabbis. Each of us, in our own way, is seeking to continue the contribution to society that he has made. May our actions and the actions of Winnipeg Jewry give our father’s neshama an aliyah!
Blessings,The Widow and all the children of Rabbi Schachter-Shalomi
Eve, Miriam, Rabbi Shalom, Josef, Yale, Chana Tina, Jonathan, Lisa, Shalvi, Rabbi Shlomo Barya, Yotam & Rossi
Features
Fake IDs and Underage Bettors: The Growing Problem for Sportsbooks
The expansion of legalized sports betting worldwide has resulted in sportsbooks grappling with a problem that they can no longer overlook: the increase in underage individuals using counterfeit identification to place bets. As more and more ways to bet through mobile apps and online sign-ups emerge, minors who are set on their goal are inventing ways to get around age limits. The emergence of this trend is a breach of the law and morality; however, it is also an enormous problem that threatens the very existence of the platforms, which are forced to rigorously obey the regulations .
Why Fake IDs Are Becoming More Sophisticated
Conventional fakes used to be quite simple to recognize—low-quality printing, different fonts for the text, and inconsistent holograms would make them not very reliable for any kind of verification. But counterfeit documents have changed significantly over time. Nowadays, fakes are made better with the help of printing technology and software, and they can even copy barcodes and other scannable features, so their IDs look almost real.
This fact complicates things significantly for sportsbooks, especially those operating online. Most of the time, automated identity verification systems capture a user’s photo and perform basic data matching. In cases where a very good fake ID is used by a teenager who looks older, some systems cannot recognize the trick. Therefore, young bettors have found ways to be able to place wagers through these loopholes.
The Influence of Social Pressure and Online Culture
Social media is a major factor in the increase in risky behavior that minors are engaging in. On various platforms such as Instagram, TikTok, and Reddit, teenagers come across betting slips, parlay wins, and big-payout screenshots that are shared, most probably, by other users. The glamorization of sports betting is leading young people to copy the behavior of influencers, older friends, or even celebrities, as they think that it is the right thing to do.
The competitiveness usually associated with sports is one of the reasons some minors decide to bet on sports. For many, betting becomes another way to engage as a fan—by predicting outcomes, challenging friends, and experiencing the same excitement that adult fans enjoy. Unfortunately, only a small number of minors fully understand the financial risks involved, making them more vulnerable to developing harmful patterns that could continue into adulthood. This is why choosing the most responsible sportsbook, which you can discover more here, is essential. Such platforms provide guidance, enforce safe practices, and ensure regulated play, allowing fans to engage with sports betting in a more informed, secure, and controlled manner.
Sportsbooks Facing Regulatory Pressure
The sportsbooks are being given the task of more closely monitoring and preventing minors from betting on their platforms. If they fail, harsh penalties are possible, including severe fines, loss of a gambling license, and negative publicity that undermines a brand’s trustworthiness. As a result, it is becoming increasingly difficult for people to verify their identities, although this also inconveniences those who are, in fact, legitimate users.
Sportsbooks have to decide between two options that are in conflict with each other: on the one hand, they have to keep the registration process as simple as possible, and on the other hand, they have to carry out age verification in a very thorough manner. The work of balancing is tough, and the underage gamblers are trying all methods to find a way out.
The Rise of Identity Fraud Services
An alarming trend is the emergence of online vendors who openly advertise fake IDs and identity documents. These vendors often claim their products can pass standard sportsbook checks. Some even tailor IDs to specific regions, knowing that certain provinces, states, or countries use verification systems that rely heavily on image comparison rather than live validation.
The availability of these fraudulent services not only empowers minors but also exposes sportsbooks to risks related to stolen identities, money laundering flags, and fraudulent accounts that may later become legal liabilities.
The Consequences for Underage Bettors
While a minor might think that gambling is just a bit of fun without any harm, the outcome can be quite serious. If there is a catching, accounts are closed right away, winnings are confiscated, and parents or guardians, in some cases, are made legally liable for any financial disagreements. Besides that, the risk of developing a gambling problem in the future increases with early exposure to gambling, especially since teenagers are more impulsive and less capable of handling financial risks.
The majority of minors are not aware that sportsbooks keep very detailed records of their activities, including device information and IP addresses. In case a fake ID works one time, using it multiple times will definitely lead to getting caught.
A Growing Problem That Requires Joint Action
Fake IDs and underage betting are issues that have become a major challenge in the industry, and no single stakeholder can solve these problems on their own. Sportsbooks need to enhance their identity verifications, regulators should get prepared for new types of fraud, technology providers have to come up with new solutions more quickly, and parents should always be aware of what their children are doing online. The industry’s rapid development is making this problem more and more urgent because the number of minors trying to get around the safety measures is increasing.
Sports betting can serve as a fun and legal form of entertainment for adults, but the need to protect the youth is what defines the industry and ensures its survival in the long run. As the quality of fake IDs keeps improving and the online culture is more and more inclined to consider betting as a normal activity, sportsbooks must ensure that underage users do not have access and that the environment is safe for all users. They need to do this now more than ever.
Features
How Canadians Are Adapting to the Boom in Legal Sports Betting
Canada’s fan engagement with sports has been radically changed by the recent single-event legalized sports betting. In the past, this was something you could only do through offshore sites or informal pools, but now it has become a normal part of the Canadian sports culture, according to GamblingNews.com. Online sportsbooks are being established at the provincial level, and private operators are entering the regulated markets, so Canadians are discovering new means to entertain, grasp, and make correct decisions in sports betting.
Widespread Adoption Across Provinces
The implementation of legal sports betting has varied across Canada’s provinces, but uptake has been strong in all jurisdictions. With its liberal licensing regime, Ontario has emerged as the most lively market in the country, thus enabling a multitude of private sportsbooks to compete. In the rest of the provinces, there are mostly platform operators controlled by the government; however, users are still in a state of rapid adjustment to the broadened offerings and new ways of wagering. As accessibility gets better, Canadians are becoming more aware of the distinctions between markets, bonuses, and betting styles, which makes the transition seem more like a logical continuation of their current sports habits.
Increased Engagement with Sports and Data
Legal betting has had an influence on how sports are consumed by a lot of Canadians. Fans are following gambling news, analyzing games in detail, checking lines more carefully, following injuries, and using statistics to make the best decision. The game-day experience has been expanded by betting, which has thus motivated fans to retain basic team loyalty. The rise of data-driven content, such as odds breakdowns, predictive analytics, and expert commentary, has been instrumental in making sports more interactive. Rather than being a passive viewer, a Canadian is now engaging more with the numbers, trends, and probabilities, thereby deepening his/her understanding of the games.
Growth of Responsible Gambling Education
As betting gets more and more exposure, a conversation about safe play is also getting louder. Gambling organizations in Canada have put in place a variety of measures and have devoted a lot of resources to making gambling more responsible and safer. Users have changed their behavior as well; they are now more aware of tools such as deposit limits, time monitoring, self-exclusion programs, and reality checks. Different provinces put a lot of effort into education first, thus helping bettors notice the signs of risky behaviour and learn how to stay within healthy boundaries. This cultural change is contributing to the normalization of responsible gambling practices instead of being treated as a mere intervention.
The Social Element of Modern Betting
Since the legalization of sports betting in Canada, it has become much more of a social activity. People in their friend circles now talk about their bets, share parlays, and watch matches together, thus creating a new level of fun. Social media is very much involved in it as bettors post their predictions, celebrate their wins, or explain their unfortunate outcomes. There are more and more online communities dedicated to betting discussions, where people find wagering as a mutually enjoyable pastime rather than a lonely one. The feeling of togetherness is what makes Canadians use betting as a part of their sports routine in a joyful and engaging manner.
Adapting to the Variety of Betting Options
With the legalization of sports betting in Canada, there are now more options available that go beyond the typical single-game bets. Live betting, player props, same-game parlays, and futures markets have all become elements of the modern betting landscape. Such a variety demands the adaptation of the bettors, and a considerable number of them are figuring out the operating principles of each type, the value of the times when they offer, and the manner in which odds change dynamically. In addition, bettors are becoming acquainted with such concepts as payout volatility, implied probability, and risk management. The learning curve is definitely there, but it has also resulted in a richer and more strategic betting experience.
Integration of Betting in Sports Media
Wide channels and sports networks in Canada have been very much on board with the advent of the betting boom. Playouts of betting lines are part of the pre-game shows, analysts are using betting language patently to highlight something on the field, and treat the sports betting companies as a partner to a team or a league for branded content. Canadians are warming up to the reality where the provision of betting information is just a normal part of their sports coverage. The change is considerable, and it can be seen as a transitory moment when betting moved from being a small niche topic to becoming a standard element of sports entertainment.
A Growing but Responsible Cultural Shift
Canadians, in the wake of legalization, see sports betting as one natural way to extend their love for sports while recognizing the necessity of self-control. Thanks to enhanced access, better education, and more transparent platforms, the whole betting experience has become safer, more enjoyable, and more a part of the daily sports culture. Canadians, as the market expands, are creating a scenario where gambling becomes a tool for deepening their connection with sports rather than a source of anxiety.
Features
How to Start Dating Online in Canada, Especially Ontario
Online dating in Canada can be genuinely effective, but only if you approach it like a simple process instead of a high-stress hobby. Ontario is a good place to date online because the population density (especially around the GTA) creates more active pools, while smaller cities still have enough users if you set your filters intelligently.
This guide gives you a practical Ontario-focused playbook: how to start dating online, what to set up, how to message, how to move to an actual date, and how to protect your time and safety.
Quick-start plan for Ontario singles
| Step | What to do | Ontario-specific example | Common mistake to avoid |
| 1. Pick your lane | Choose 1–2 platforms based on your goal | Toronto: nearly any major app is active; smaller towns: broaden radius to nearby cities | Downloading 6 apps and burning out fast |
| 2. Build a “real” profile | 4–6 photos + short bio + 2 prompts | Add a local hook: “Best coffee spot in Ottawa?” or “Best weekend day trip from the GTA?” | Only selfies, no bio, or “ask me” |
| 3. Message with intent | 1 specific question + 1 next step | “Coffee or a walk this week?” | “Hey” and waiting for magic |
| 4. Move to a date quickly | Suggest a public, simple meet | “30–60 minutes at a cafe near Union Station” | Texting for 3 weeks, never meeting |
| 5. Use safety rules | Public first date, own transport, tell a friend | Share date location + time with a friend | First meeting at someone’s home |
| 6. Filter hard, stay kind | End mismatches early and politely | “I’m looking for something more serious—wishing you the best.” | Debating obvious red flags |
1) Choose apps based on what you want (not what’s trendy)
Before you pick anything, decide your “dating intention” for the next 30 days:
- Serious relationship-focused: choose platforms where profiles have prompts, values, and more context. These tend to produce better conversations and clearer intentions.
- Casual dating / exploring: faster, swipe-heavy apps can work if you’re direct and you don’t take it personally when people vanish.
- International or broader discovery: consider platforms that make cross-border matching and messaging easy, especially if your local pool feels repetitive.
Ontario tip: if you’re outside Toronto or Ottawa, don’t assume “online dating doesn’t work.” Often it’s a settings problem. Increase your radius to include a nearby hub (for example, Hamilton, Kitchener-Waterloo, London, or the GTA), and be open to meeting halfway.
2) Build a profile that feels human (and gets better matches)
Your profile isn’t a résumé. It’s a conversation starter. The best profiles do two things:
- show what you look like, clearly
- show what it might feel like to date you
Photos: a simple set that works
Aim for 4–6 photos:
- One clear face photo (good lighting, no sunglasses).
- One full-body photo (normal setting, not a bathroom mirror).
- One lifestyle photo (hobby, cooking, gym, hiking, reading, music).
- One “social proof” photo (with friends is fine, but make it obvious who you are).
- Optional: a photo that shows your vibe (casual, dressed up, outdoorsy, artsy).
Avoid extremes: all selfies, all group shots, all travel photos, or filters that change your face. You’re not advertising perfection. You’re signaling honesty.
Bio: a 3-line formula that converts
Use this structure:
- Who you are: one sentence
- What you want: one sentence
- Local hook: one sentence
Example bios (Ontario-ready):
- “Ontario-based, equal parts ambitious and laid-back. Looking for a real connection with someone emotionally mature. Tell me your go-to comfort food or your favorite hidden spot in your city.”
- “New-ish to the area and building a life I’m proud of. I’m dating with intention, but I like things to unfold naturally. Coffee dates and good conversation beat endless texting.”
- “I’m the type who plans a day trip and packs snacks. Looking for someone kind, consistent, and curious. Bonus points if you like markets, walks, and laughing at dumb jokes.”
3) Messaging that doesn’t sound like a bot
Most conversations die because people write low-effort openings. Your first message should be:
- specific
- easy to answer
- slightly playful or warm
- connected to their profile
Openers you can copy
- “You seem like someone with good taste—what’s a perfect Saturday for you?”
- “Quick question: coffee first date or a walk first date?”
- “You mentioned hiking—are you more ‘short scenic trail’ or ‘full-day mission’?”
- “What’s the most underrated place in your city for a chill date?”
- “Two truths and a lie—go.”
A realistic mini-script to move toward a date
- You: “I’m enjoying this chat. Want to keep it simple and do coffee this week?”
- Them: “Sure.”
- You: “Great. I’m free Thursday evening or Sunday afternoon. Which works?”
In Ontario, many people appreciate directness because schedules fill up quickly (commutes, hybrid work, family obligations). Clarity reads as confidence, not pressure.
4) First date ideas that work in Ontario year-round
Plan dates that survive weather and keep pressure low.
Best first-date formats:
- coffee/tea (60 minutes is perfect)
- casual lunch
- market + snack
- walk in a busy, public area (only if weather is decent)
- museum/gallery (good for conversation breaks)
Ontario-specific practical tip: keep the first meet short and public. If it’s going well, you can extend it. If it’s not, you can leave politely without feeling trapped.
5) Safety and boundaries (the non-negotiables)
Online dating is normal. Basic safety habits should be normal too.
Do this every time:
- meet in public for the first date
- use your own transportation
- tell a friend where you’re going and when you expect to be done
- keep personal details (address, workplace specifics) private until trust is earned
Watch for pressure signals:
- pushing to meet at their home immediately
- refusing a simple video call but demanding quick trust
- love-bombing (intense affection very early)
- turning the conversation toward money, “business,” or investments
If someone reacts badly to your boundaries, that’s useful information. It means your boundaries are working.
6) Ontario realities: age and alcohol
If you’re dating in Ontario, it’s also helpful to know common legal basics: the age of majority is 18, and the legal drinking age is 19. If you’re unsure or you’re traveling within Canada, double-check local rules, but those are the typical Ontario standards people plan around (especially when choosing bars or venues).
7) A simple 2-week routine that prevents burnout
If you want progress without turning dating into a second job:
Week 1
- build a solid profile (one evening)
- swipe/message 15–20 minutes per day
- aim for 5–10 quality conversations, not 100 matches
- propose 1–2 simple dates
Week 2
- go on those dates
- adjust your profile based on who you actually liked
- tighten filters (age range, distance, intentions) to reduce noise
Online dating improves fast when you treat it like an experiment: test, learn, refine. You don’t need more apps—you need better signals, clearer messaging, and consistent boundaries.
If you want, tell me your approximate age range and whether you’re aiming for serious, casual, or international dating, and I’ll tailor the examples (bio + openers + first-date ideas) specifically for Ontario in the same format.