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The Torah Tells Us We Must Stay Positive to Persevere Through Hard Times
Reading from a Torah scroll in accordance with Sephardi tradition. Photo: Sagie Maoz via Wikimedia Commons.
I heard an unattributed quote some years ago: “Complaining is like bad breath – you notice it when it comes out of someone else’s mouth, but not when it’s your own.”
It’s so true. Complaining is ubiquitous to the point of being a cultural requirement. And in a world in which if you complain hard enough it can result in a payout, the compulsion to complain about anything and everything is simply overwhelming.
A pastor from Kansas has made it his life’s goal to roll back the tide, and to end the complaints culture for good. Reverend Will Bowen never intended to launch a worldwide movement; he simply suggested to his parishioners one Sunday in 2006 how they could improve their lives with the help of a wristband. Today, he’s sent out over five million wristbands to 80 different countries – unwittingly unleashing one of the most significant self-improvement crusades since Dale Carnegie.
Not that he’s complaining, mind you. Because that’s precisely the point. Bowen has given up complaining – well, mostly – and he wants the rest of the world to do the same. Bowen believes there is a direct correlation between an excess of global grumbling and why the world is not how we would like it to be.
What the world needs most, he believes, is for people to stop griping and start focusing on the positive.
It all began in 2006, when he suggested to his congregation of 250 that they give up complaining for just 21 days. According to several studies, this is the length of time that it takes to break a habit.
To reinforce his message, he handed out purple silicone bracelets stamped with the word “Spirit.” Those who accepted the challenge to wear the bracelet would move it from wrist to wrist whenever they caught themselves complaining, and those who managed to keep their bracelets on the same wrist for three straight weeks were issued a “certificate of happiness.”
The no-complaining idea struck a chord. Word spread, and Bowen began getting requests for bracelets from around the world. He set up a nonprofit group, “A Complaint Free World,” and recruited volunteers to fill orders. Soon he was on TV and in the newspapers. Then, after appearing on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Bowen received orders for more than 2 million bracelets. Today, he sends out at least 25,000 wristbands a week.
We live in a world where complaints are omnipresent. Social media platforms, customer service hotlines, and even casual conversations are filled with grievances and criticisms. Expressing dissatisfaction has become a universal pastime. But have you ever paused to think about the implications of our collective proclivity for complaining?
Take, for example, the recent outcry over the quality of airline services. It’s almost become a ritual to grumble about cramped seats, delayed flights, and less-than-palatable in-flight food — if there is food! According to the most recent annual Airline Quality Rating released by Wichita State University, overall complaints about commercial flying increased by 55% in 2022.
The report found that all four performance criteria – on-time arrivals, involuntary denied boardings, mishandled bags, and customer complaints – declined compared to 2021. Or did they? Have things actually gotten worse, or are people simply complaining more? Airlines are scrambling to address the concerns, but perhaps there is something deeper going on: people are complaining about the slightest inconvenience in a way that previous generations didn’t.
And the phenomenon of widespread complaints isn’t limited to airlines. Restaurants, retail stores, and even public services are constantly at the receiving end of criticism. This culture of complaining has created an environment where businesses and service providers are in a perpetual state of defense, always trying to anticipate and mitigate negative feedback.
But what is achieved by our incessant grumbling? Does it lead to constructive changes, or does it just foster a sense of perpetual dissatisfaction and negativity? And how does complaining affect our mental and emotional well-being? Research indicates that frequent complaining rewires our brains, making us more likely to focus on the negative aspects of our lives and less likely to appreciate the positive.
Instead of defaulting to complaints, what if we practiced gratitude and sought constructive solutions? Imagine the transformation if, instead of lamenting a delayed flight, we took a moment to appreciate that air travel connects us to distant loved ones and exciting opportunities. What if, instead of criticizing a meal in a restaurant, we expressed our preferences in a way that helps the chef improve and innovate?
While reading through this week’s Torah portion, Devarim, I was suddenly struck by an idea that I’d never thought of before. Devarim is the first of a series of portions that recall Moses’ final addresses to the Israelites before they embarked on the conquest of the Promised Land.
In his speeches, Moses offered profound lessons on faith, responsibility, and duty. But thrown in among his words of wisdom are recollections of all the many instances when the nation had fallen short. And, notably, every one of those instances involved complaints of one sort or another.
Despite witnessing incredible miracles and experiencing divine intervention that ensured their survival against the odds, the Israelites frequently resorted to grumbling, sometimes when they faced challenges, but often when they had no real cause to complain.
Every commentator raises the same question: why did Moses bring up this aspect of the nation’s behavior? Why dredge up ancient history just as the Israelites were about to realize the promise of a new life in the land God had pledged to their ancestors?
The commentaries offer a range of answers, but perhaps the point Moses was making was simple. Instead of all the complaints they had made moving things in a positive direction, all that had happened was that each incident had brought further misery and further exacerbated the Israelites’ unhappiness. Moses was telling them, “The best route to happiness is to refrain from complaints, and to find the good in every situation! Had you not complained, we could have been here so much earlier, and avoided so much trouble.”
Fast-forward to modern times, and this lesson remains equally relevant. Our tendency to complain overshadows the many blessings and opportunities we have. Just as Moses urged the Israelites to reflect on the fact that their complaints had only made things worse, we, too, can benefit from this perspective.
Finding reasons to be cheerful and grateful is so much better than seeking out problems – and then going on and on about them. While it’s totally natural to feel dissatisfaction and express it, we must be mindful of how we do it. To make complaining a way of life only breeds negativity and discontent. By adopting a mindset of gratitude and constructive feedback, we not only improve our own well-being but also contribute to a more positive environment all around.
The lesson of Moses in Devarim teaches us how our words can affect outcomes. The more negative we are, the more negative our lives will turn out to be. But when we embrace a more positive, solution-oriented outlook, our lives will be so much better. As Dale Carnegie put it so well, “Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain – and most fools do.”
The author is a rabbi in Beverly Hills, California.
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Netanyahu Says Houthis Paying ‘Heavy Price’ After Israel Strikes Yemen
Smoke rises after Israeli strikes near Sanaa airport, in Sanaa, Yemen, Dec. 26, 2024. Photo: REUTERS/Khaled Abdullah
Israeli warplanes bombed a power station and two ports in Houthi-controlled Yemen on Friday in retaliation for the Iran-backed terrorist group’s drone and missile strikes against Israel, and pro-Houthi media said at least one person had been killed and nine wounded.
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said in a statement that the Houthi rebels in Yemen were “paying and will continue to pay a heavy price for their aggression against us.”
“Today, we attacked terrorist targets of the Houthi terrorist regime along the western coastal strip and deep in Yemen. The Houthis are a proxy of Iran, and they serve the terrorist objectives of the Iranian axis in the Middle East,” Netanyahu added. “They constitute a danger to Israel and the entire region, including global freedom of navigation.”
The strikes hit the Red Sea port of Ras Issa and the major port of Hodeidah and the Hezyaz central power station in Yemen’s capital Sanaa, and Harf Sufyan District in Amran province also came under air attack, said Al Masirah TV, the main news outlet run by the Houthis.
An employee at the Ras Issa port was killed and six others were injured, while three people, including a worker, were wounded in the strikes on Hezyaz, the outlet said.
The Israeli military said more than 20 aircraft took part in the attack, dropping around 50 bombs and missiles in an operation which required airborne refueling during the 2,000-km (1,240-mile) flight.
Earlier, British security firm Ambrey said airstrikes on the Ras Issa port targeted oil storage facilities in the vicinity of shipping berths, though no merchant vessels were reported to have been damaged.
The supply of petroleum derivatives is stable, the Houthi government spokesperson Hashem Sharaf Eddine said after the attack.
An Israeli military statement confirmed the targets, saying the power station served as a “central source of energy for the Houthi terrorist regime in its military activities.” It added that the targets struck were examples of the “Houthis’ exploitation of civilian infrastructure.”
“The Houthi terrorist regime has repeatedly attacked the State of Israel, its citizens and civilian infrastructure in Israel,” including using drones and surface-to-surface missiles, the IDF said. “The State of Israel has the right and obligation to defend itself.”
The Israeli military added that Houthi “attacks on international shipping vessels and routes continue to destabilize the region and the wider world.”
“While the Houthi terrorist regime operates as an independent terrorist organization, it relies on Iranian cooperation and funding to attack the State of Israel and its citizens,” it continued. “The IDF will continue to operate at any distance against any threat to the State of Israel and its citizens.”
Within the past 48 hours, the Houthis have fired three drones at Israel‘s commercial hub Tel Aviv and more drones and missiles at the US aircraft carrier Harry S. Truman in the Red Sea, Houthi military spokesperson Yahya Saree said.
The Houthis have targeted Israel, hundreds of kilometers to the north as well as international shipping in waters near Yemen since November 2023 in support of Palestinian terrorists at war with Israel in Gaza.
Israel has responded with airstrikes in Houthi-held areas of Yemen, as have British and US forces in the region.
Netanyahu said last month Israel was only at the beginning of its campaign against the Houthis.
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US House Education Committee Chair Denounces Biden Admin’s ‘Toothless’ Campus Antisemitism Settlements
Demonstrators take part in an “Emergency Rally: Stand With Palestinians Under Siege in Gaza,” amid the ongoing conflict between Israel and Hamas, at Harvard University in Cambridge, Massachusetts, US, Oct. 14, 2023. Photo: REUTERS/Brian Snyder
The new chairman of the US House Committee on Education and the Workforce has excoriated several recent civil rights settlements that, he says, allow colleges to evade accountability for being derelict in their handling of campus antisemitism after Hamas’s attack on Israel last Oct. 7.
“It’s disgraceful that in the final days of the Biden-Harris administration, the Department of Education is letting universities, including Rutgers, five University of California system campuses including UCLA, and John Hopkins, off the hook for their failures to address campus antisemitism. The toothless agreements shield schools from real accountability,” Rep. Tim Walberg (R-MI) said in a statement issued on Thursday. “The Trump administration should closely examine these agreements and explore options to impose real consequences on schools, which could include giving complainants the opportunity to appeal these weak settlements. And certainly, no more complaints should be settled before President Trump takes office.”
The Office for Civil Rights (OCR), a division within the US Department of Education, has spent the past year and a half investigating universities accused of allowing an open season of hate on Jewish students. Such inquiries, if they are not closed due to insufficient evidence, may result in settlements in which higher education institutions admit to having violated Title VI of the Civil Rights Act and commit to enacting policies which remedy their noncompliance.
For example, Rutgers University recently agreed, as part of an OCR settlement, to train employees to handle complaints of antisemitism, issue a non-discrimination statement, and conduct a “climate survey” in which students report their opinions on discrimination at the school and the administration’s handling of it. In that case, OCR identified “compliance concerns” regarding the university’s handling of violent threats against Jewish students, the desecration of Jewish religious symbols, and discrimination targeting a predominantly Jewish fraternity, Alpha Epsilon Pi (AEPi).
Additionally, Temple University agreed last month to implement “remedial” policies for past, inadequately managed investigations of discrimination and to apprise OCR of every discrimination complaint it receives until the conclusion of the 2025-2026 academic year. It also agreed to conduct a “climate” survey to measure students’ opinions on the severity of discrimination on campus, the results of which will be used to “create an action plan” which OCR did not define but insisted on its being “subject to OCR approval.”
In Thursday’s statement, Walberg denounced these and other similar settlements, which were spearheaded by a US presidential administration that refused to recognize anti-Zionism as a form of antisemitism, as little more than a pantomime.
“These so-called resolutions utterly fail to resolve the civil rights complaints they purport to address. The department is shamefully abandoning its obligation to protect Jewish students, faculty, and staff, and undermining the incoming administration,” he said.
Nothing short of a revolution of the current habits and ideas which constitute the current higher education regime can prevent antisemitism and extreme anti-Zionism on college campuses, the US House Committee on Education and the Workforce has previously argued. An overturning of the current order, it wrote in a report published before the winter holidays, would involve reforming aspects of the campus culture which do not appear immediately connected to the issue of antisemitism. Fostering “viewpoint diversity,” for example, would prevent echo chambers of ideological zeal which justify hatred and violence as a means of overcoming one’s political opponents, the report said. It also argued that restoring “academic rigor,” undermined by years of dissolving educational standards for political purposes, would guard against the reduction of complex social issues into the sloganeering of “scholar activism,” in which faculty turn the classroom into a soapbox.
In lieu of so momentous a change, the report encouraged the executive branch of the US government, which is awaiting the arrival of a new administration headed by President-elect Donald Trump, to enforce colleges’ applying Title VI of the Civil Rights Act to incidents of antisemitism and punish those that do not by, for example, freezing their access to federal funds.
Nearly two years of an epidemic of campus antisemitism unlike any ever seen in the US is what has caused Walberg and his committee colleagues to be suspicious of resolutions which maintain the status quo in American higher education. Since Oct. 7, 2023, anti-Zionist activity on college campuses has increased by 477 percent, according to the Anti-Defamation League (ADL) — a trend which has resulted in Jewish students being spit on, assaulted, and pelted with hate speech not uttered openly in the US since the 1950s at America’s most prestigious universities. Holding them accountable, the committee has said, has been difficult due to their ability to mobilize their immense legal and social capital against any action which threatens their power.
“Rather than treat the antisemitic hate plaguing their campuses as a serious problem, they handled it as a public relations issue,” the committee said in its report, citing one example of the corruption it identified. “Penn [University of Pennsylvania] administrators [tried] to orchestrate media coverage depicting members of Congress as ‘bullying and grandstanding’ and Columbia Board of Trustees leaders dismissing congressional oversight on campus antisemitism as ‘capital hill [sic] nonsense.’”
Moreover, it added, university leaders have heaped opprobrium on those who investigate campus antisemitism and openly wished that the Democratic Party would win a majority in the US Congress, an outcome they believed would quell any further inquiries into the matter.
“The findings expose a disturbing pattern of defensiveness and denial among institutions,” the report concluded. “Rather than confronting the severity of the problem, many institutions have dismissed congressional and public criticism and abdicated responsibility for the hostile environments they have enabled. This refusal to acknowledge or address the issue has allowed antisemitism to root and thrive in spaces that contravene the values of this great nation.”
Follow Dion J. Pierre @DionJPierre.
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Israeli Defense Chief Orders IDF to Plan for Hamas Defeat if Hostage Talks Fail
Israeli Defense Minister Israel Katz looks on, amid the ongoing conflict in Gaza between Israel and Hamas, in Jerusalem, Nov. 7, 2024. Photo: REUTERS/Ronen Zvulun
JNS.org — Defense Minister Israel Katz has instructed the Israel Defense Forces to urgently develop a plan for a decisive victory over Hamas in Gaza if a hostage deal is not finalized before US President-elect Donald Trump is inaugurated for a second term on Jan. 20.
“If the hostage deal does not materialize by the time President Trump takes office, Hamas in Gaza must face complete defeat,” Katz stated in a release issued by his office on Friday.
The statement emphasized that Israel must avoid being drawn into a prolonged war of attrition, which would be costly and fail to deliver a strategic victory or end the conflict in Gaza. Katz called for a plan ensuring Hamas’s total defeat, which the IDF is expected to present during upcoming security assessments.
During a meeting on Thursday night attended by IDF Chief of Staff Lt. Gen. Herzi Halevi and other senior officials, Katz reiterated that securing the release of the hostages remains the top priority of the defense establishment. “Everything must be done to bring them home,” he said.
Katz also instructed the IDF to identify potential challenges to implementing the plan, such as humanitarian concerns, and to leave those decisions to the political leadership. He emphasized that discussions on Gaza’s political future are irrelevant to the current military strategy, saying that no Arab or other party would assume responsibility for Gaza’s civilian affairs while Hamas remains intact.
Israeli forces target Hamas leadership, kill key terrorists
The IDF and Israel Security Agency (Shin Bet) announced on Thursday the elimination of key Hamas figures involved in attacks on Israeli forces.
In a series of airstrikes, Osama Abu Namos, the commander of the “Sabra” Battalion in Hamas’s Gaza City Brigade, and his deputy Mahmoud Al Tarq were killed. Both men were responsible for directing attacks on Israeli troops and civilians.
Additionally, Mahmoud Shaheen and Hamada Diri, company commanders in the battalion, were eliminated for their roles in coordinating attacks and supplying weapons.
The IDF and Shin Bet affirmed their commitment to continuing operations against Hamas terrorists.
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