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Yizkor: We Should Remember the Best Version of Our Loved Ones
In the Ashkenazi tradition, the Yizkor service stands out as an emotional highlight of each festival. On specially designated days, those who have lost parents, spouses, siblings, or children remain in the synagogue to recite memorial prayers, while those whose parents are still alive respectfully leave the sanctuary. The Hebrew word “Yizkor,” meaning “will remember,” initiates each prayer, emphasizing the enduring memory of those who have passed away and ensuring their remembrance even in their absence.
In the introduction to my latest book, Hearts & Minds on Jewish Festivals, I explore how deeply personal memories integrate into the observance of festivals. Reflecting on memories of shared experiences with my family throughout the Jewish calendar year over many years, I highlight the profound impact these memories have each time these festivals roll around again. Each treasured moment recalled enriches and profoundly enhances our celebrations:
These memories and so many more turn each festival and each significant Jewish date into a rich blend of history, tradition, Jewish laws and customs, memories, nostalgia, and new experiences. Every wine stain on the pages of the Haggadah we use, every forgotten High Holidays schedule tucked into the pages of the maḥzor, the special yomtov-connected drawings our kids made in preschool that reappear at the relevant time each year, the smell of yomtov food cooking in the kitchen—all these elements form a vivid mosaic of our Jewish experience, adding color, context, and depth to the practical aspects of the festivals and notable Jewish dates that punctuate our lives.
These reflections invite us to consider the dual nature of memory — with its inevitable mix of accuracy and embellishment — and the significant roles our remembered versions of events and experiences play in shaping our lives.
Psychology researcher and science communicator Dr. Julia Shaw, known for her exploration of memory and particularly false memories, addresses these themes in her book The Memory Illusion. She investigates how memories can be distorted, fabricated, and influenced by various factors.
Dr. Shaw explores the phenomenon of people recalling events that never happened, discussing the implications for fields like criminal law and our understanding of personal history. Interestingly, she suggests that these alterations in memory are not always detrimental; often, they serve to highlight the most favorable aspects of our loved ones and our past.
In eulogies, we often commemorate our loved ones in the most favorable light possible. The memories we recall are inherently selective and somewhat distorted, as they portray an idealized version of our departed loved ones — a version we all hope to be remembered by one day, when it is our turn to be eulogized.
When someone highlights less flattering aspects of a deceased person during a eulogy, it can shock the audience. I recall a funeral years ago for a university professor of mine, a celebrated scholar of history. His grandson’s eulogy began by acknowledging his grandfather’s reputation as a brilliant intellect and a fount of knowledge — then it shifted to a more personal note: “But there was more to him than that,” he added. “I will always remember him as the old man with dandruff on his jacket, who could be quite irritable and impatient. That was my grandpa.”
As he spoke, I couldn’t help but think, along with everyone else, “Is this really the memory to share at his funeral?”
The podcast Where There’s a Will, There’s a Wake, hosted by English actress Kathy Burke, is premised on a novel concept: “If you could plan your perfect death, what would you do?”
Each episode features celebrities who are asked to imagine their own untimely demise, take charge of their hypothetical funeral arrangements, choose their preferred way to go, create playlists, and even listen to eulogies prepared in advance by their friends.
While intriguing, this concept starkly contrasts with reality — where the memory of who we are is shaped by others, typically our family members, who preserve and interpret our legacies. Nevertheless, these curated memories, richly assembled from diverse perspectives, still do not capture the complete truth. Despite varied viewpoints, no two people will ever remember someone in exactly the same way.
During our festive gatherings over Yom Tov, we often find ourselves immersed in family stories, both old and new. As we enjoy each other’s company and celebrate together, these time-honed tales are shared and reshaped with each retelling. Over the years, details are embellished, and characters grow larger than life, creating increasingly engaging narratives.
This process not only entertains but also strengthens family bonds, imparts values, and fosters a sense of continuity and belonging. Enriched memories become an important part of our collective family heritage, celebrated during these special occasions.
The Yizkor service utilizes the power of memory to connect us with those who have passed on. We engage deeply with our memories, idealizing and appreciating the positive aspects while overlooking the flaws. This idealization is not without merit, as highlighted by a remarkable passage from the Talmud.
The Talmud (Sanhedrin 92b) unpacks Ezekiel’s seminal “dry bones” prophecy. According to the biblical narrative (Ez. 37:1-14), Ezekiel is brought to a valley filled with dry, lifeless bones and asked by God if these bones can live again. He responds that only God knows, prompting God to command Ezekiel to prophesy over the bones. Miraculously, as Ezekiel prophesies, the bones reassemble, grow flesh, and are infused with life, becoming a vast army.
This vision is interpreted in the Talmud as symbolizing the Israelites from the tribe of Ephraim who, driven by impatience, had tried to conquer the land of Israel prematurely at the dawn of Jewish history. Their failure and demise are represented by the dry bones, which are then miraculously revived by Ezekiel.
The question is: Did this event actually happen, or is Ezekiel’s vision merely symbolic? Rabbi Yehuda and Rabbi Nehemiah view the entire episode as a metaphor, suggesting it never actually occurred. Then, unexpectedly, Rabbi Eleazar, son of Rabbi Yosi HaGelili, asserts that the narrative is true, and that the revived bones went on to marry and have children.
This claim is further complicated by Rabbi Yehuda ben Beteira, who claims to be descended from those supposedly metaphorical figures, and adds that “these are the tefillin that my grandfather bequeathed to me from them.”
The thirteenth-century rabbinic luminary, Rabbi Shlomo ben Aderet (Rashba), clarifies this debate by suggesting that some aggadic passages are significant not necessarily because they occurred, but because they represent events that could have transpired. This idea means these stories transcend mere metaphor. They are potential narratives that impart lessons and carry deep messages, regardless of their historical authenticity.
In the specific case of Rabbi Yehuda ben Beteira claiming to have inherited tefillin from descendants of those revived by Ezekiel, the Rashba seemingly interprets this not as a literal historical claim but as a narrative device intended to convey deeper truths or lessons about faith, continuity, and the transmission of tradition. The focus is on the value and impact of the story rather than its factual accuracy.
This approach to memory and narrative is crucial, especially in prayers like the Yizkor service, where we remember our deceased loved ones in the best possible light. It’s not about facts, or about history — but about values and heritage.
By remembering our loved ones as the best versions of themselves — whether these memories are entirely accurate or somewhat enhanced — we not only honor their legacy but also inspire ourselves to aspire to these ideals. This process elevates the souls of the departed and enriches our own lives, demonstrating the power of memory to shape not only our perception of the past, but also our actions in the present and our aspirations for the future.
The author is a rabbi in Beverly Hills, California.
The post Yizkor: We Should Remember the Best Version of Our Loved Ones first appeared on Algemeiner.com.
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Columbia University Says It Suspended Pro-Hamas Agitator Who Stormed Classroom
Anti-Israel agitators disrupting an Israeli history class at Columbia University, New York City, Jan. 21, 2025. Photo: Screenshot
Columbia University has suspended one of several students who disrupted an active class earlier this week and proceeded to utter pro-Hamas propaganda and distribute antisemitic literature, the school announced on Thursday.
On Tuesday, the first day of classes of the new semester, the agitators stormed into Professor Avi Shilon’s course, titled “History of Modern Israel.” Clad in keffiyehs, which were wrapped on their faces to conceal their identities, they read prepared remarks which described the course as “Zionist and imperialist” and a “normalization of genocide.” As part of their performance, which they appeared to film, they dropped flyers, one of which contained an illustration of a lifted boot preparing to trample a Star of David. Next to the drawing was a message that said, “Crush Zionism.”
Another flyer proclaimed, “Burn Zionism to the ground.”
The incident set off an explosion of responses on social media. The US House Committee on Education and the Workforce — now chaired by Rep. Tim Walberg (R-MI) — warned that such behavior “will no longer be tolerated in the Trump administration,” while Columbia University professor and activist Shai Davidai demanded “strong action.” Later, Shilon wrote in an op-ed published by the Israeli publication Ynetnews that Columbia needs to “reevaluate” its safety policies, noting that students should not be able to “walk around wearing masks.”
On Thursday, the university attempted to quell concerns that it would do nothing, as it has been accused of before, and announced that it “has identified and suspended a Columbia participant” of the demonstration. The punishment, it added, will hold until the completion of a “full investigation and disciplinary process.”
The statement continued, “The investigation of the disruption, including the identification of additional participants, remains active. Disruptions to our classrooms and our academic mission and efforts to intimidate or harass our students are not acceptable, are an effort to every member of our university community, and will not be tolerated.”
Columbia University has allegedly refused to levy disciplinary sanctions against anti-Zionist agitators in the past.
In August, the US House Committee on Education and the Workforce denounced university officials for punishing only a few of the anti-Zionist activists who last spring occupied an administrative building and staged a riot which prompted the university to advise Jews to refrain from coming to campus. According to documents shared by the committee, 18 of the 22 students who were given disciplinary charges for their role in the incident were later upgraded to “good standing” despite the university’s earlier pledge to expel them. Another 31 of 35 who were suspended for illegally occupying the campus with a “Gaza Solidarity Encampment” were restored to good standing as well.
Amnestying those students was “disgraceful and unacceptable,” former education committee chairwoman Rep. Virginia Foxx (R-NC) said at the time. She added, “The vast majority of the student perpetrators remain in good standing. By allowing its own disciplinary process to be thwarted by radical students and faculty, Columbia has waved the white flag in surrender while offering up a get-out-of-jail-free card to those who participated in these unlawful actions.”
Meanwhile, Columbia University continues what is widely perceived as a partisan investigation of Davidai, an inquiry prompted by accusations that condemning terrorism is racist and anti-Muslim. In October., the university banned Davidai from campus, an action which prevents him from attending university functions and accessing his office. Since then, Davidai has accused Columbia of prolonging its investigation of his conduct to injure his reputation and destroy his academic career.
At the same time, the university has allowed a pro-Hamas professor and cheerleader of violence, Joseph Massad, to continue teaching about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, despite that he is on record supporting terror — after the Oct. 7 massacre, for example, he described the Hamas fighters who paraglided into the Nova Music Festival in southern Israel to murder the young people attending it as “the air force of the Palestinian resistance” — and has been accused of antisemitism dozens of times.
On Tuesday, Columbia University Interim President Katrina Armstrong maintained that Columbia opposes antisemitism.
“We want to be absolutely clear that any act of antisemitism, or other form of discrimination, harassment, or intimidation against members of our community is unacceptable and will not be tolerated,” she said in a statement.
Follow Dion J. Pierre @DionJPierre.
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Nashville School Shooter Praised Hitler, Said He Was ‘Influenced’ by Candace Owens in Purported Manifesto
Solomon Henderson, 17, who police say opened fire at Antioch High School in Nashville, TN on Jan. 22, 2024 before killing himself, posted neo-Nazi content on social media. Photo: Screenshot
The teenager accused of perpetrating a fatal school shooting in Nashville, Tennessee on Wednesday praised Adolf Hitler, shared neo-Nazi content, and said he was inspired by anti-Israel commentator Candace Owens, according to reports of the alleged shooter’s purported manifesto.
Police identified the shooter as Solomon Henderson, a 17-year-old student at Antioch High School, saying he shot and killed Josselin Corea Escalante, who was 16, and wounded two others in the school’s cafeteria before turning the gun on himself.
Authorities are also investigating a racist and antisemitic manifesto full of online writings and social media posts that emerged following the shooting that has been attributed to Henderson to determine if the materials were actually the work of the alleged shooter.
Multiple local media outlets, including NewsChannel 5 Nashville and The Tennessean newspaper, reported that the documents indicated that the suspect harbored a litany of antisemitic beliefs and drew inspiration from Owens, a far-right media personality.
“Candace Owens has influenced me above all each time she spoke I was stunned by her insights and her own views helped push me further and further into the belief of violence over the Jewish question,” the manifesto reportedly said.
Henderson, who like Owens is black, also posted a flyer from the Goyim Defense League, an antisemitic hate group which, according to the Anti-Defamaion League (ADL), has an “overarching goal to expel Jews from America.”
The suspect’s purported writings indicate he was mentally deteriorating and suffered from self-loathing. Henderson reportedly wrote that he “was ashamed to be black.” He also repudiated Antioch High School, which has a heavily Black and Hispanic student body, with the use of derogatory racial terms.
The ADL’s Center on Extremism issued an analysis of the document, saying it appears to be authentic.
“Our analysts located a sprawling manifesto full of anti-black content, references to accelerationism, and antisemitism,” Carla Hill of the Center on Extremism, told The Tennessean. “It also plagiarized from various far-right manifestos and publications, including Terrorgram Collective [a white supremacist group] and a manifesto by Matthew Harris.”
Harris, who is black, was arrested in 2022 for threatening a mass shooting against the University of California, Los Angeles, where he had worked as a philosophy instructor. He posted a manifesto that included calls for violence against Jews and white people.
In the 15 months since the Palestinian terrorist group Hamas’s massacre across southern Israel on Oct. 7, 2023, Owens has established herself as a fierce critic of the Jewish state who has also been accused of antisemitism. After parting ways with The Daily Wire, a politically conservative media company, last year amid controversy over her comments regarding Jews and Israel, Owens has made those subjects top priorities in her new show.
In late July, for example, Owens said that the Star of David originated from an evil, child-sacrificing, pagan deity and has only become associated with Judaism within the past few hundred years.
In a June episode, Owens argued that “it seems like our country [the US] is being held hostage by Israel.” She lamented, “I’m going to get in so much trouble for that. I don’t care.” She also falsely suggested in the same episode that AIPAC, the foremost pro-Israel lobbying organization in the US, was behind the assassination of former US President John F. Kennedy.
Weeks later, Owens promoted a series of talking points downplaying the atrocities of the Holocaust and said experiments by Nazi doctor Joseph Mengele performed on Jews during World War II sounded “like bizarre propaganda.”
In an August interview, Owens claimed that Judaism is a “pedophile-centric religion that believes in demons … [and] child sacrifice.” She has also suggested without evidence that Israel was established to shield “pedophiles” from accountability.
As a result of her comments, Owens received the “Antisemite of the Year” award for 2024 from the US-based advocacy group StopAntisemitism. The controversial media personality happily accepted the distinction while stating that the charge of antisemitism no longer maintains “any real meaning.” Owens then claimed that Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu is actually the most prominent antisemite, because he has “murdered and killed and maimed more actual Semites this year” than anyone else.
Owens issued a statement on Thursday in response to reports noting her name being mentioned in the alleged Nashville shooter’s purported writings.
“It is truly sickening that people would use the death of a young 16-year-old girl to try to quickly score political points, rather than to responsibly make sure that what they are sharing is accurate,” Owens said, calling the manifesto “an obvious troll.”
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Hamas Terrorists Admit Israeli Hostages Held at Gaza’s Kamal Adwan Hospital
Ahmad Kahalot, a senior Hamas member and director of Kamal Adwan Hospital in Gaza, speaking to Israeli interrogators. Photo: Screenshot
Israeli hostages were held in Gaza’s Kamal Adwan Hospital, a new report citing terrorists’ confessions revealed this week.
The discovery followed an Israeli raid that uncovered a sprawling network of terrorists operating within the hospital’s walls, leading to the detention of over 240 Hamas terrorists, some of whom — including a senior commander who attempted to evade capture by posing as a patient with a broken arm — admitted that the facility was used as a base for Hamas operations.
The hospital, which is located in Beit Lahia in the northern Gaza Strip, was used to hide terrorists at different times, Fox News Digital said in a report published on Tuesday. According to captured terrorist Anas Muhammad Faiz al-Sharif, the hospital was seen as a “a safe haven for them because the [Israeli] military cannot directly target it.”
Gonen Ben Itzhak, former spy handler for Mosab Yousef, the son of Hamas’s co-founder who became an informant for Israel, said the news came as no surprise, noting that international aid organizations were “complicit in war crimes carried out under the cover of those criticizing Israel.”
“Hamas’s reign of terror in Gaza has led to the fact that all government systems in the Strip, as well as civilian systems, are subordinate to Hamas and have an affiliation with Hamas,” the Shin Bet agent turned lawyer and activist told The Algemeiner.
During last month’s raid, Israeli forces uncovered that its director, Dr. Hussam Abu Safiya, was actively complicit in Hamas’s terrorist activities. As interrogations of detainees progressed, it became clear that Abu Safiya was more than just a passive observer — he was a key figure in facilitating Hamas operations. Despite his involvement in the group’s actions, an international campaign has emerged since then to call for his release, a movement spurred by his media appearances throughout the war.
“We realized that the person at the heart of it all, the one organizing the terrorism and Hamas activities within the compound, was the hospital director himself,” Lt. (res.) D., a field investigator in military intelligence, told Israel’s Channel 12 news. “The world must understand that there is close and clear cooperation between the medical team and the senior leadership of the terrorist organization: they cynically exploit our desire to avoid harming the helpless and use the medical platform to establish a base for terrorism.”
Terrorists inside the facility reportedly distributed grenades, mortars, and equipment for ambushing Israel Defense Forces (IDF) troops. “The [terrorist] operatives were there, transporting equipment and weapons like AK-47s … and pistols,” Faiz al-Sharif said, confirming that “the weapons were transferred to and from the hospital.”
Lt. D also reported becoming suspicious of a man posing as an injured patient during a routine check at the hospital’s ambulance platform. Upon questioning, the man gave a false name and ID, claiming to have been injured days earlier. But, the cast on his arm appeared freshly applied, raising the IDF investigator’s doubts. The investigator would later learn that he was a senior Hamas commander who had been involved in the Oct. 7, 2023 invasion of southern Israel and was still running terror operations until the day of his capture.
“During the interrogation, [the terrorist] confessed that the doctor sitting next to him had faked the cast to help him escape in a humanitarian aid ambulance. He explained Hamas’s strategy, saying they know there’s little chance the IDF will interrogate wounded individuals being evacuated for medical treatment, so he tried to exploit the opportunity to flee,” Lt. D told Channel 12.
Ben Itzhak blasted international aid organizations, including UNRWA and the Red Cross, for serving as a facade enabling terrorist operations in Gaza.
“The international organizations bear responsibility for war crimes committed by Hamas against Israel, against the Israeli hostages, and also against the poor residents of Gaza,” he told The Algemeiner.
“They allowed Hamas to trample on international law and use civilian infrastructure: kindergartens, schools, clinics, and hospitals as military headquarters … dragging Israel into military activity that is perceived by the world, in the eyes of those who are not familiar with the cruel reality of Gaza, as war crimes.”
The hospital’s ties to terrorism run deep and are longstanding, starting with its very name. Kamal Adwan, for whom the facility is named, was a Palestinian Fatah operative responsible for attacks in Nahariya and Tel Aviv’s Carmel Market before being killed by the IDF in 1973.
Last month’s raid wasn’t the first on the hospital. On Dec. 12, 2023, around 90 people were detained, including its then director, Ahmed Kahlout. The IDF at the time released a video of his interrogation, in which he described how Hamas used the hospital as a base for Hamas operations. Its ambulances were used to transport terrorists and even Israeli hostages, Kahlout said.
Kahlout revealed that he was recruited into Hamas’s Izz ad-Din al-Qassam Brigades and received military training. He also said that other staff members, including doctors, nurses, and paramedics, were part of Hamas’s military network. Kahlout called Hamas leaders “cowards” and blamed them for the suffering, saying, “They ruined us,” hinting that his involvement may not have been entirely voluntary. He was later released, but according to Palestinian media reports, was killed by an Israeli drone in November.
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