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‘You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah’ is about Jews. So why is the nicest character Christian?
(The Jewish Chronicle via JTA) — There are so many things to love about the new Netflix film “You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah” that it seems almost churlish to single out the one big thing that I think it got wrong. So first — spoilers ahoy — let me say what I think it got right.
Yes to showing Jewish tweens living their lives, doing their thing and grappling with the social and spiritual demands of a year when everyone around them is doing that too. Yes to every member of the Sandler family — dad Adam, daughters Sadie and Sunny and wife Jackie — giving great performances, and that goes for Idina Menzel as well. Yes to the way that the kids struggle for individuality in a world where every party has the same DJ and much the same set of guests. A qualified yes to the kooky, deeply irritating, but ultimately wise Rabbi Rebecca, played by Sarah Sherman.
There’s a great cast of older Jewish character actors and young stars in the making. And it’s nice to see an emphasis on the synagogue and “mitzvah project” side of things, not just the party.
Well done too for showing tweens as flawed humans, capable of great cruelty and stupidity but who are also willing to grow and learn, and use the big rite of passage as a vehicle for that growth. There are plot holes, to be sure (the tensions from Lydia’s bat mitzvah would have rumbled on for generations, not resolved in a tidy moment of catharsis), but you roll with it. I had tears in my eyes at the (implausible) ending.
I also liked the multicultural nature of the Jewish world on show. There are Latino Jews. There are Korean Jews. We might as well be in Israel: Everyone in the movie appears to be Jewish.
Everyone except Mateo.
Mateo is one of only two young boy characters in the film given anything like a personality (the others have catchphrases but nothing resembling two dimensions). He’s a friend of Andy Goldfarb, the soccer player on a mission to kiss the girls and make them cry. Mateo is short and has a foreign accent, and none of the Jewish kids except Andy pay him any attention.
But we gradually come to realize that Mateo — uniquely — is really nice and good, the moral center of the film. And even though he’s a churchgoing Christian, he turns up at Hebrew school, to teach the younger children their Shabbat prayers. This was not true of the Mateo-inspiration character in the book by Fiona Rosenbloom on which the movie is based, and it confused me, because what kind of synagogue lets a Christian kid volunteer there? Have they never heard of evangelicals? Mateo’s answer: “I go to chuch every Sunday. Might as well fill in the other six days with some other, you know, holiness, too.”
Because Mateo’s a Christian, he’s not having a bar mitzvah. And so he doesn’t have the same journey to go on as the other kids. But he doesn’t need to: From the start, he seems to be infinitely more virtuous than all of them. With Mateo the sole representative of Christianity in the film, one could read into it the message that Christians are somehow better than Jews. That they embrace mitzvot naturally, without a big song and dance, led by DJ Shmuley. That Christianity is somehow a more evolved, better religion.
The film’s closing scene makes clear what hints along the way have suggested — that Stacy will give up on brutish Andy and realize just how charming Mateo is. The implication is that Stacy — seen at the end dancing with Mateo, even though he’s a foot shorter than her — will one day become more like Mateo.
Now I have nothing against Christians — some of my best friends, et cetera, et cetera — and I’m all for interfaith friendships. And I’m not fretting about intermarriage here, in part because that’s not where seventh-grade flings typically end up.
But did anyone, when they were writing the screenplay, think through the implications of creating a pint-sized Christian saint and plonking him into a Jewish narrative? I can’t look at the story arc and the slow dancing without feeling the weight of thousands of years of Jewish persecution stemming from the idea that Christians have it figured out and Jews need to catch up to their enlightenment. Even the most benign explanation, that the filmmakers wanted to include someone from the dominant culture to make the movie relatable to the widest audience, is a reminder that we cannot escape Christian hegemony even when we tell our own stories.
It didn’t have to be this way. If you want to show a multifaith universe, where are the Muslim, Hindu and Buddhist kids? But better yet, Mateo could have been Jewish like the rest of the cast. With that mop of curly hair, short stature and love of Hebrew school, he easily could have been the nicest Jewish boy in town.
A version of this piece originally appeared in The Jewish Chronicle, a London-based newspaper. It is reprinted here with permission.
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The post ‘You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah’ is about Jews. So why is the nicest character Christian? appeared first on Jewish Telegraphic Agency.
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Germany’s Halt to Arms Exports to Israel Is Response to Gaza Expansion Plans, Chancellor Says
German Chancellor Friedrich Merz attends a cabinet meeting at the Chancellery in Berlin, Germany, Aug. 6, 2025. Photo: REUTERS/Liesa Johannssen
Germany’s decision to curb arms exports to Israel comes in response to Israel’s plan to expand its operations in the Gaza Strip, Chancellor Friedrich Merz said on Sunday in an interview with public broadcaster ARD.
“We cannot deliver weapons into a conflict that is now being pursued exclusively by military means,” Merz said. “We want to help diplomatically, and we are doing so.”
The worsening humanitarian crisis in Gaza and Israel’s plans to expand military control over the enclave have pushed Germany to take this historically fraught step.
The chancellor said in the interview that the expansion of Israel’s operations in Gaza could claim hundreds of thousands of civilian lives and would require the evacuation of the entire city of Gaza.
“Where are these people supposed to go?” Merz said. “We can’t do that, we won’t do that, and I will not do that.”
Nevertheless, the principles of Germany’s Israel policy remain unchanged, the chancellor said.
“Germany has stood firmly by Israel’s side for 80 years. That will not change,” Merz said.
Germany is Israel’s second-biggest weapons supplier after the US and has long been one of its staunchest supporters, principally because of its historical guilt for the Nazi Holocaust – a policy known as the “Staatsraison.”
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Newsom Calls Trump’s $1 Billion UCLA Settlement Offer Extortion, Says California Won’t Bow
California Governor Gavin Newsom speaks at a press conference, accompanied by members of the Texas Democratic legislators, at the governor’s mansion in Sacramento, California, U.S., August 8, 2025. Photo: REUTERS/Carlos Barria
California Governor Gavin Newsom said on Saturday that a $1 billion settlement offer by President Donald Trump’s administration for UCLA amounted to political extortion to which the state will not bow.
The University of California says it is reviewing a $1 billion settlement offer by the Trump administration for UCLA after the government froze hundreds of millions of dollars in funding over pro-Palestinian protests.
UCLA, which is part of the University of California system, said this week the government froze $584 million in funding. Trump has threatened to cut federal funds for universities over anti-Israel student protests.
“Donald Trump has weaponized the DOJ (Department of Justice) to kneecap America’s #1 public university system — freezing medical & science funding until @UCLA pays his $1 billion ransom,” the office of Newsom, a Democrat, said in a post.
“California won’t bow to Trump’s disgusting political extortion,” it added.
“This isn’t about protecting Jewish students – it’s a billion-dollar political shakedown from the pay-to-play president.”
The government alleges universities, including UCLA, allowed antisemitism during the protests and in doing so violated Jewish and Israeli students’ civil rights. The White House had no immediate comment beyond the offer.
Experts have raised free speech and academic freedom concerns over the Republican president’s threats. The University of California says paying such a large settlement would “completely devastate” the institution.
Large demonstrations took place at UCLA last year. Last week, UCLA agreed to pay over $6 million to settle a lawsuit by some students and a professor who alleged antisemitism. It was also sued this year over a 2024 violent mob attack on pro-Palestinian protesters.
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Trump Nominates State Dept Spokeswoman Bruce as US Deputy Representative to UN
FILE PHOTO: U.S. State Department spokesperson Tammy Bruce speaks during her first press briefing at the State Department in Washington, D.C., U.S., March 6, 2025. Photo: REUTERS/Kevin Lamarque/File Photo
President Donald Trump said on Saturday he was nominating State Department spokesperson Tammy Bruce as the next US deputy representative to the United Nations.
Bruce has been the State Department spokesperson since Trump took office in January.
In a post on social media in which Trump announced her nomination, the president said she did a “fantastic job” as State Department spokesperson. Bruce will need to be confirmed for the role by the US Senate, where Trump’s Republican Party holds a majority.
During press briefings, she has defended the Trump administration’s foreign policy decisions ranging from an immigration crackdown and visa revocations to US responses to Russia’s war in Ukraine and Israel’s war in Gaza, including a widely condemned armed private aid operation in the Palestinian territory.
Bruce was previously a political contributor and commentator on Fox News for over 20 years.
She has also authored books like “Fear Itself: Exposing the Left’s Mind-Killing Agenda” that criticized liberals and left-leaning viewpoints.
In a post after Trump’s announcement, Bruce thanked him and suggested that the role was a “few weeks” away. Neither Trump nor Bruce mentioned an exact timeline in their online posts.
“Now I’m blessed that in the next few weeks my commitment to advancing America First leadership and values continues on the global stage in this new post,” Bruce wrote on X.
Trump has picked former White House national security adviser Mike Waltz to be his U.N. envoy. Waltz’s Senate confirmation for that role, wherein he will be Bruce’s boss, is still due.
Waltz was Trump’s national security adviser until he was ousted on May 1 after he was caught up in a March scandal involving a Signal chat among top Trump national security aides on military strikes in Yemen. Trump then nominated Waltz as his U.N. ambassador.