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Memoir of child of Holocaust survivors takes riveting twists
Book Review by Julie Kirsh (former Sun Media News Research Director)
Exclusive to The Jewish Post
“We used to Dream of Freedom, A Memoir of Family, the Holocaust, and the Stories We Don’t Tell”
By Sam Chaiton (Dundurn Press) 2024
Sam Chaiton’s memoir of growing up with Holocaust survivor parents in downtown Toronto in the 1950s is a compelling read.
Jeanne Beker, a well known Toronto fashion writer, mentions in her praise for “We used to Dream of Freedom” that her survivor parents talked incessantly about their war experiences.
My own parents, both survivors, would drop tidbits of their stories now and again. I learned to be watchful and vigilant for these rare moments of revelation. However, questioning my parents about the Holocaust, would cause them pain. I knew when to stand down.
In his memoir, Sam Chaiton tells the reader that his parents chose to remain completely silent about their wartime experiences. Poignantly their son was left with a silence that he interpreted as huge empty sound. Although the son could understand some Yiddish, his parents turned to Polish in order to keep the “kinder safe”. Outright denial of illness and death was part of his parents’ way of coping.
Born in the 1950s on Palmerston Boulevard in downtown Toronto, Chaiton paints a vivid picture of his youth as the middle son of five boys. He describes the mayhem of a household of barked orders and punishment by his father’s belt. His mother, as with many other survivors, was obsessed with eating and food. Chaiton learned early that rejecting his controlling mother’s food was one of his few weapons. “It’s hard not to do what a Holocaust survivor wants you to”, he says. Chaiton had to stare down two parents both with tattoos.
Dance proved to be a saving grace for Chaiton. On the dance floor, with a partner, the gates of happiness and permission to be oneself, opened. The Toronto Dance Theatre in Yorkville was a salvation and home for Chaiton. Also important to Chaiton was a family – not his troubled blood family but a chosen one – a commune.
In 1973, after a sojourn in New York, Chaiton decided that he was not a performance dancer. Back in Toronto as he pointedly danced with his mother at his brother’s wedding, she told him that he was her favourite child, imposing “the psychological damage that parental favouritism caused”.
Living in a commune with a chosen family afforded Chaiton the freedom to dig deep into his psyche, face his traumatic upbringing and tear down the rigid rules of society and the biological family. At a certain point, for reasons he explains in the book, Chaiton made the decision to vanish from the lives of his parents and brothers.
In 1980 the commune took up the cause of the injustice and illegal jailing of Rubin “Hurricane” Carter. Carter had been exonerated, released from prison and then reconvicted and sent back to prison.
In hindsight Chaiton wonders if his disengagement from his family caused them the same wounds and feelings of emptiness that Carter had to face when he was reincarcerated.
In 1985 while sitting in a New Jersey prison yard with friends and Carter, Chaiton had the riveting vision that he was in a concentration camp, “on a mission to liberate (his) parents – the dream of every Holocaust survivor’s child.”
In the summer of 1985, Chaiton received the news from Toronto that his parents were involved in a fatal car accident. Only after his mother’s death, was Chaiton able to acknowledge that in spite of her smothering, she gave him a sense of self worth and strength.
In 1988 Chaiton co-wrote the story of freeing Carter. One of his brothers saw him on a news broadcast, contacted him and the 20-year silence between Chaiton and his blood family was over.
Riding on the coattails of the successful release of Carter, Chaiton and some friends established an organization that continues to exist today. Innocence Canada has helped wrongfully convicted people like Guy Paul Morin, David Milgaard and Steven Truscott.
In chapter 16, entitled Wierzbnik, Chaiton finally learns about his father’s testimony published in a book, “Remembering Survival”, by a university professor. Reading about his father’s history helped Chaiton to understand the damage done to survivors, his parents’ trauma and why the home that they created for their sons after the war was so fraught.
Chaiton remarks on the interconnectedness of learning about the sufferings of his parents, his own personal struggles and the gift his father left him of being able to tell his own story.
Sam Chaiton’s profound memoir took courage and brutal honesty to write.
His book teaches that the legacy left by Holocaust survivors, along with a deep sadness, is the innate need of the children to persevere and find their own path of survival and growth.
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Katz: ‘Israel’s Goal in Lebanon is to Disarm Hezbollah’
Then-Israeli transportation minister Israel Katz attends the cabinet meeting at the Prime Minister’s office in Jerusalem, Feb. 17, 2019. Katz currently serves as the foreign minister. Photo: Sebastian Scheiner/Pool via REUTERS
i24 News – Israel’s Defense Minister Israel Katz held a situation assessment Friday with senior military and defense officials, reiterating that the country’s policy in Lebanon remains focused on disarming Hezbollah by military and political means. Katz emphasized that the goal applies “regardless of the Iran issue” and pledged continued protection for Israeli northern communities.
Katz said the Israel Defense Forces are completing ground maneuvers up to the anti-tank line to prevent direct threats to border towns. He outlined plans to demolish houses in villages near the border that serve as Hezbollah outposts, citing previous operations in Rafah and Khan Yunis in Gaza as models.
The Defense Minister added that the IDF will maintain security control over the Litani area and that the return of 600,000 residents of southern Lebanon who had evacuated north will not be permitted until northern communities’ safety is ensured. Katz also reaffirmed that the IDF will continue targeting Hezbollah leaders and operatives across Lebanon, noting that 1,000 terrorists have already been eliminated since the start of the current campaign.
“We promised security to the northern towns, and that is exactly what we will do,” Katz said. He further warned that the IDF will act decisively against rocket fire from Lebanon, stating that Hezbollah “will pay heavy prices.”
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Pope Leo Urges Israel’s Herzog to End Iran War in Phone Call, Vatican Says
Pope Leo XIV delivers a homily during the Palm Sunday Mass in Saint Peter’s Square at the Vatican, March 29, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Remo Casilli
Pope Leo spoke on the phone with Israeli President Isaac Herzog on Friday and urged him to “reopen all paths of dialogue” to end the Iran war, the Vatican said.
The pope, who has emerged as a sharp critic of the regional conflict, also urged Herzog to protect civilians and promote respect for international and humanitarian law, the Vatican added.
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Iran Leaders Join Crowds on Tehran’s Streets to Project Control in Wartime
Iranians gather at a park on Nature Day, amid the U.S.-Israeli conflict with Iran, in Tehran, Iran, April 2, 2026. Photo: Majid Asgaripour/WANA (West Asia News Agency) via REUTERS
After more than a month of being stalked by targeted assassinations, Iran’s leadership has adopted a new tactic to show it is still in control – with senior officials walking openly in the streets among small crowds who have gathered in support of the Islamic Republic.
In recent days, Iran’s president and foreign minister have separately mixed with groups of several hundred people in central Tehran. On Tuesday, state television aired footage of the two posing for selfies, talking to members of the public and shaking hands with supporters who had gathered in public areas.
According to insiders and analysts, the appearances are part of a calculated effort by Iran’s theocratic leadership to project resilience and authority — not only over the vital Strait of Hormuz but also over the population — despite a sustained US-Israeli campaign aimed at “obliterating” it.
One insider close to the hardline establishment said such public outings are intended to show that the Islamic Republic is “unshaken by strikes and that it remains in control and vigilant” as the war grinds on.
The US-Israeli war on Iran began on February 28 with the killing of veteran Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei and several senior military commanders in waves of strikes that have since continued to target top officials.
Iran’s new Supreme Leader, Mojtaba Khamenei, has not been seen in public since taking over on March 8 from his father. Foreign Minister Abbas Araqchi, meanwhile, was removed from Israel’s hit list amid mediation efforts last month, including by Pakistan, to bring Tehran and Washington together for talks to end the war.
Talks aimed at ending the war have since appeared to have petered out, as Tehran brands US peace proposals “unrealistic.” Against that backdrop, recent public appearances by President Masoud Pezeshkian and Araqchi appear designed to project defiance, if not a convincing display of public support.
A senior Iranian source said officials’ public presence demonstrates that “the establishment is not intimidated by Israel’s targeted killing of top Iranian figures.”
Asked whether Iran’s foreign minister or president were on any sort of kill list, an Israeli military spokesperson, Nadav Shoshani, said on Friday he would not “speak about specific personnel.”
NIGHTLY RALLIES TO SHOW RESILIENCE
Despite widespread destruction, Tehran appears emboldened by surviving weeks of intense US-Israeli attacks, firing on Gulf countries hosting US troops and demonstrating its ability to effectively block the Strait of Hormuz.
On Wednesday, US President Donald Trump vowed more aggressive strikes on Iran, without offering a timeline for ending hostilities. Tehran responded by warning the United States and Israel that “more crushing, broader and more destructive” attacks were in store.
Encouraged by clerical rulers, supporters of the Islamic Republic take to the streets each night, filling public squares to show loyalty even as bombs rain down across the country.
Analysts say the establishment is also seeking to raise the “political and reputational” cost of the strikes at a time when civilian casualties are deeply disturbing for Iranians.
Omid Memarian, a senior Iran analyst at DAWN, a Washington-based think tank, said the decision to send officials into gatherings reflects a layered strategy, including an effort to sustain the morale of core supporters at a moment of acute pressure.
“The system relies heavily on this base; if its supporters withdraw from public space, its ability to project control and authority weakens significantly,” Memarian said.
Speaking to state television, some in the crowds voice unwavering loyalty to Iran’s leadership; others oppose the bombing of their country regardless of politics; and some have a stake in the system, including government employees, students and others whose livelihoods are tied to it.
Hadi Ghaemi, head of the New York-based Center for Human Rights in Iran, said the establishment is using such loyal crowds as human shields to raise the cost of any assassination attempts.
“By being in the middle of large crowds they have protections that would make Israeli-American attacks against them very bloody and generate sympathy worldwide,” he said.
POTENTIAL PROTESTERS STAY OFF STREETS AT NIGHT
The Islamic Republic emerged from a 1979 revolution backed by millions of Iranians. But decades of rule marked by corruption, repression and mismanagement have thinned that support, alienating many ordinary people.
While there has been little sign so far of anti-government protests that erupted in January and abated after a deadly crackdown, the establishment has adopted harsh measures – such as arrests, executions and large-scale deployment of security forces – to prevent any sparks of dissent.
Rights groups have warned about “rushed executions” during wartime after Iran hanged at least seven political prisoners during the war.
“Many potential protesters are frightened by the continuing presence of armed men and violent crowds in the streets and largely stay at home once darkness falls,” Ghaemi said.