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Jewish marriage rites are robust. Now a rabbi is innovating rituals for Jews who divorce.
(J. The Jewish News of Northern California via JTA) — For Lyssa Jaye, throwing the wood chips into the Tuolumne River felt in many ways familiar to the tashlich ritual performed on Rosh Hashanah. But rather than casting off her sins, she was tossing away feelings: shame, resentment, anger.
They were the emotions that had taken residence inside Jaye since her divorce eight years ago, along with a sense of failure. And she had come to a Jewish retreat to rid herself of them.
“I’ve been carrying around these feelings for years now,” Jaye said. “I have a completely different life now, and I needed to let them go.”
Jaye was taking part in Divorce & Discovery: A Jewish Healing Retreat, the first-ever gathering in a series conceived by Rabbi Deborah Newbrun as part of her training, held this month at Camp Tawonga in the Bay Area.
One of the requirements at the Pluralistic Rabbinical Seminary, where Newbrun was ordained last year in the first graduating class, “was that each of us had to do an innovation, or something that didn’t exist before,” she said.
Newbrun, who directed Camp Tawonga for more than two decades, has been recognized for innovative programming for such achievements as initiating Tawonga’s LGBT family camp and founding its wilderness department. She even won a prestigious 2018 Covenant Award for Jewish educators. But as she started thinking about how to fulfill the seminary requirement, her first thought was, “I don’t have any ideas left in me.”
Then she began reflecting back on her divorce years earlier. She remembered how she had approached numerous rabbis and colleagues in search of Jewish support around the grief she felt. And how they all came up empty-handed.
That’s when she realized: “I can put together something meaningful and helpful for people going through divorce.”
From the moment participants arrived at Camp Tawonga near Yosemite, they knew this would be no ordinary Jewish retreat. At the opening event, all of the facilitators, several clergy members and a therapist shared their own divorce stories, “to set the standard and normalize vulnerability, transparent sharing and establish that we all know what it’s like to have a marriage end,” Newbrun said.
Most participants were from the Bay Area, with a handful from farther afield. They were in different life stages, from those in their 30s dealing with custody battles over young children, to empty nesters in their 60s. Some had separated from their partners years ago, while others had gone their separate ways more recently. Some split amicably; a good many did not. But all had come up against a lack of Jewish resources or support when navigating this major life passage.
Rabbi Deborah Newbrun, the founder of Divorce and Discovery at the recent weekend. (Photo/Margot Yecies)
Jaye said she left no stone unturned in seeking out support, an experience Newbrun said she heard echoed by many participants. Jaye attended a retreat at a local meditation center. She read self-help books. She joined a support group for divorcees. She went to therapy.
And while they all helped in different ways, none was specifically Jewish.
“I knew I needed some kind of spiritual way forward,” she said. “I needed to do this in my own language, with my own people.”
Even though the retreat came nearly a decade years after Jaye’s divorce, “it was profound. It felt like coming home, and that this is what I needed all along. This model could be extremely powerful. The rituals we did could be taught in rabbinical schools or to Jewish educators so it’s not just ‘sign this get and goodbye,’” she said, referring to the Jewish divorce document.
Rather than create new rituals, Newbrun and her facilitators took familiar Jewish rituals and retooled them.
The tashlich ritual, led by Newbrun and Maggid Jhos Singer, had a call-and-response portion, and participants also could call out what they personally wanted to cast off. “One person ‘tashliched’ their wedding ring into the river and felt it was such a perfect place to let it go!” said Newbrun.
An optional immersion in the Tuolumne River followed. Jaye, who years ago went to the mikvah alone, with only the attendant there for support, said there was no comparison with how much more healing it felt performing the ritual in community.
A session on sitting shiva for one’s marriage, led by Rabbi Sue Reinhold, allowed participants to share and mourn the loss of what they missed most about being married. That resonated for Robyn Lieberman, who does not attend synagogue services but went to every session at the retreat on innovating Jewish rituals.
“I did need to mourn what I’m losing,” said Lieberman, who had been married to an Israeli. “We had a very public, open house around Jewish religion, and a constant Israeli identity, which fulfilled my Jewish needs.”
Rabbi Jennie Chabon of Congregation B’nai Tikvah in Walnut Creek reflected on how much time she has spent with couples preparing for their wedding day, both in premarital counseling and in planning the event, and on how many marriage-related topics are covered in rabbinical school.
“And when it comes to divorce? Nothing,” Chabon said. “We’re all out here on our own trying to figure out how to wander through it.”
She was tasked with creating a havdalah ceremony with a divorce theme, in which she reimagined the wine, spices and flame typically used to mark a division between Shabbat and the rest of the week.
“There’s a fire that burns within each of us, and that flame doesn’t go out,” said Chabon, 47. “When you’re married for a long time, your identity, energy and spirit is so woven into that of another.” Her ritual was meant to affirm that “you are on fire just as you are, and you’re a blessing as an individual in the world. You don’t need a partnership or family to be whole.”
Even the Shabbat Torah service was on theme.
Rabbi Jennie Chabon reads from the Torah during a service at the Divorce and Discovery retreat. (Photo/Margot Yecies)
Rather than focusing on Noah’s emergence from the ark after the flood, Chabon spoke about a lesser-known section of the week’s Torah portion, in which Noah builds a fire and offers a sacrifice to God. But if the entire earth was drenched from the flood, Chabon asked, what did he burn?
“The answer is he must have burned the ark,” Chabon said in recalling her talk at the retreat. “What does that mean for people going through this incredibly painful and tender time in their lives, when what was once a safe container and secure and protected them, they have to burn it down in order to start life anew?
“This is a perfect rebirth metaphor. But what’s being birthed is a new self and a new identity in the world as a single person,” Chabon said. “You have to release and let go of what was to make room for the blessing for who you’re going to become.”
At a ritual “hackathon” workshop presented by Newbrun, participants suggested standing during Kaddish at synagogue to mourn their marriages, and offering their children a Friday night blessing that they are whole whether they are at either parent’s home.
Not all of the sessions centered on Jewish ritual. In a session on the Japanese art of kintsugi, or mending broken pottery, attendees made vessels whose cracks they fixed with putty, symbolizing that beauty can be found in imperfection. Many danced in a Saturday-night silent disco.
Everyone was assigned to a small group, or havurah, that they met with daily, so they could establish deeper connections within the larger cohort.
“To have gone through some of these practices was very meaningful to me,” said Lieberman. “It’s not like I put a seal on my marriage and wrapped it up in a bow and put it behind me, but it was a nice catharsis for completing a transition that I’ve been very thoughtful about.”
Newbrun aims to recreate the retreat in communities around the country. Both Jaye and Lieberman said they found value in being in community with people “who get it,” without the judgment they often face.
“I was a little skeptical that all I’d have in common with people was that we were Jewish and divorced, and that that wouldn’t be enough for me to form a relationship,” said Lieberman. “But having the willingness to talk about it and explore it did open up a lot of very vulnerable conversations. The expert facilitation really made us think about the fact that divorce is not about your paper [certificate], it’s about reexamining the direction of your life and who you want to be.”
A version of this piece originally ran in J. The Jewish News of Northern California, and is reprinted with permission.
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Iran War Increases Threat to Sweden, Security Service Says
Swedish Security Service Chief Charlotte von Essen speaks next to Fredrik Hallstroem, chief of operations, during a press conference where the Swedish Security Service (SAPO) presents the situational picture of the country’s security, in Stockholm, Sweden, March 18, 2026. Photo: TT News Agency/Claudio Bresciani via REUTERS
Sweden‘s Security Service (SAPO) warned on Wednesday of increased threats to the Nordic nation from the war in Iran, including risks to Jewish targets, as it released its annual national security assessment.
“History has shown that a desperate and pressured regime can be a dangerous regime,” SAPO operative chief Fredrik Hallstrom told a press conference, referring to the US-Israeli war on Iran.
Iran has long been considered a serious threat, and Swedish authorities have noted how criminal networks – already at the center of a decade-long surge in gang-related violence – have been exploited by state actors to carry out attacks.
“The US-Israeli military operation against Iran, and the countermeasures carried out by Iran, have increased the threat against American, Israeli, and Jewish targets in Sweden,” Security Service Chief Charlotte von Essen said in the report.
In recent years, the agency has also highlighted threats from China and, above all, Russia, which it describes as increasingly willing to take risks in support of its war in Ukraine — including through hybrid operations across Europe.
“Overall, we expect that the threat levels against Sweden will continue to deteriorate in the coming years,” von Essen said, adding that Russia was regarded as a primary driver.
While it is difficult to determine what can be linked to a particular actor, Sweden assesses that Russia is behind several sabotage incidents in Europe targeting critical infrastructure, the security service said. Moscow has denied any involvement.
The agency said it has reviewed hundreds of cases of suspected sabotage in Sweden, including of underwater cables, electricity substations and water-treatment facilities.
“It has so far not been possible to link any physical sabotage to a foreign power,” it said.
The comments came as Iran executed a Swedish citizen on Wednesday, according to Sweden‘s foreign minister, who added that she had summoned the Iranian ambassador in Stockholm to condemn the decision.
The person, who was not named, was arrested in Iran in June of last year and Sweden has repeatedly raised the case with Iranian officials, Foreign Minister Maria Malmer Stenergard said.
“The death penalty is an inhumane, cruel, and irreversible punishment. Sweden, together with the rest of the EU, condemns its application in all circumstances,” Stenergard said.
The legal proceedings leading up to the execution did not meet the standards of due process, she added.
The European Union’s foreign policy chief Kaja Kallas condemned the execution in a statement on Wednesday evening.
“The appalling human rights situation in Iran and the alarming increase in executions are intolerable and show the regime’s true colors,” she said, sending condolences to the family of the citizen.
The Swedish foreign ministry and the Iranian embassy in Stockholm did not immediately respond to a request for comment when contacted by Reuters via phone and email.
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Israel Doubles Troops in Hezbollah Fight, Searches Homes in South Lebanon
Israeli soldiers walk next to military vehicles on the Israeli side of the Israel-Lebanon border, amid escalation between Hezbollah and Israel, and amid the US-Israeli conflict with Iran, in northern Israel, March 16, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Avi Ohayon
Israel has more than doubled the number of troops along its border with Lebanon since March 1 and they are searching homes in southern Lebanese villages that the military has ordered evacuated, a senior Israeli commander said on Wednesday.
As Israeli warplanes pound Beirut in operations against Hezbollah that have become the deadliest spillover of the US-Israeli war on Iran, heavy smoke could be seen rising from villages in southern Lebanon as troops fired artillery across the border.
Hundreds of thousands of Lebanese have fled southern Lebanon since Israel ordered people to clear the area south of the Litani River, viewed by Israel as a stronghold of Iran-backed terrorist group Hezbollah. The Shi’ite Islamist group has been firing rockets toward Israel since joining the war in support of Iran on March 2.
‘DEFENSIVE POSITIONS’ INSIDE LEBANON
“The plan is to make sure that Hezbollah does not have military infrastructure,” said the commander, whose name was withheld by the Israeli military on security grounds.
Speaking to Reuters in Eilon, an Israeli town four kilometers from the border, the commander, who is responsible for infantry warfare in Lebanon, declined to say how many troops Israel had now deployed in the area.
Describing the military’s fortifications inside Lebanon as “defensive positions,” he said troops were searching “the villages to see if Hezbollah hid weapons or communications centers.”
Asked if that included searching houses that residents had fled following Israeli orders, the commander said: “In some of the cases they hid their weapons in houses. We have no choice but to make sure that house is not a military installation.”
Two Israeli soldiers have been killed since the start of operations in southern Lebanon, the Israeli military says.
At least 968 people in Lebanon have been killed since the start of Israel‘s attacks, Lebanese authorities say.
Hezbollah has not provided regular updates on deaths among its fighters. On Monday, a Hezbollah official told Reuters that at least 46 had been killed so far.
LEBANESE VILLAGE OF KHIYAM AN INITIAL TARGET
The Israeli military is advancing slowly through southern Lebanon, aiming to completely clear the town of Khiyam as a first step before advancing toward the Litani River, according to a Lebanese security source and a foreign official tracking developments on the ground.
In response to a question on whether Israel intended to establish positions up to the Litani, the commander said it was not his decision. If troops receive orders, he added, they are “prepared to do all kind of operations.”
The Israeli military did not immediately comment on its operations in Khiyam, five kilometers inside the Lebanese border from the Israeli town of Metula.
Along the border near Metula, Reuters saw several Israeli military fortifications dug into hillsides, filled with rows of tanks, armed personnel carriers, and bulldozers.
Smoke rose from Khiyam throughout the day on Wednesday, and many of the buildings on the southern side of the town had been reduced to rubble. A neighboring town remains in ruins from Israel‘s attacks in 2024.
‘EVERY FIVE MINUTES YOU CAN HEAR THE BOMBS’
Israel‘s northern border area with Lebanon is known as the Upper Galilee, its rolling hills offering vantages into southern Lebanese villages now occupied and bombarded by Israeli troops.
Near Metula, Israeli Apache helicopters and jets were making near-constant sorties on Tuesday and Wednesday, with the sounds of rocket fire from Lebanon interspersed with the booms of Israeli artillery fire.
For residents of Israel‘s far north, the current war with Hezbollah has seen less rocket fire than during a year of fighting that ended in 2024.
Hezbollah‘s ability to launch missiles has largely been degraded, but it still retains capacity to strike areas deep inside Israel, Israeli officials say.
Ofer Moskovitz, 60, who works at an avocado farm in the area, and said being so close to the border meant he had little time to run to a bomb shelter when sirens signaled incoming Hezbollah fire.
Near his farm, the military dug out a muddy fortification from where troops fired artillery across the border.
“Every five minutes you can hear the bombs,” he said.
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Syria Unveils Plan to Eliminate Assad’s Chemical Weapons
Syrian Arab Republic’s Ambassador to the United Nations Ibrahim Olabi addresses the Security Council during the meeting on the situation in the Middle East, at UN headquarters in New York City, US, Feb. 18, 2026. Photo: REUTERS/Jeenah Moon
Syria on Wednesday launched a plan supported by Washington to rid the Middle Eastern country of legacy chemical weapons that were used against its people by forces under ousted leader Bashar al-Assad.
For decades, Assad ran a large-scale program for chemical weapons, the use of which killed and injured thousands during Syria‘s long-running civil war.
Despite Damascus’ signing onto the Chemical Weapons Convention in 2013 and declaring a 1,300-ton stockpile, prohibited use continued and the size of the program remains unclear.
An international taskforce backed by the United States, Germany, Britain, Canada, and France, among others, will track down all remaining elements of the program and destroy them under the supervision of the Organization for the Prohibition of Chemical Weapons, Syria‘s ambassador to the United Nations, Ibrahim Olabi, said in an interview.
As many as 100 sites in Syria need to be inspected to determine what toxic munitions remain and how they should be destroyed, OPCW experts have said.
It will require a time-consuming and costly operation to prevent the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction in a region fraught with conflict and political turmoil. The expanding US-Israeli war on Iran and broader regional security concerns will make the timing of the mission uncertain, but all the more necessary to prevent future use, officials said.
GOVERNMENT VOWS FULL ACCESS
Assad was overthrown in December 2024, and the new government under Syrian President Ahmed al-Sharaa has vowed to turn a page and eradicate banned chemical weapons and give inspectors full access.
The move shows that Syria has shifted from a country that was once concealing chemical weapons use to one that is “leading the resolve” to do away with them, Olabi said.
Several international investigations concluded that the nerve agent sarin, as well as chlorine and sulfur mustard gas, was used by the Assad regime, but never revealed the full extent of the clandestine program.
“We don’t know what’s remaining. It was a secret program,” Olabi said. “The job is on Syria to basically look for these things and then declare them.”
A diplomatic source, who spoke on condition of anonymity to discuss the sensitive matter, said the 100 sites could be anything from military bases to laboratories or offices.
“It will probably take many months if not years to get it done, and of course the current situation in the Middle East doesn’t help the process to move forward to the actual destruction of any remnants of Assad‘s chemical weapons program,” the source said.
