Features
Book Review: “The Matchmaker’s Gift”
By BERNIE BELLAN Given the subject matter of Beatty Cohan’s column elsewhere on this site – online dating, I thought it appropriate to write about a book I recently finished reading, titled “The Matchmaker’s Gift,” by Lynda Cohen Loigman, which was released last fall.
Now, ordinarily, I think it’s fair to presume that a title like that would engender more interest among women than men and, to be honest, I can’t remember why it is that I chose to download this particular book on to my Kindle a couple of months ago. Whatever the reason, I quite enjoyed reading “The Matchmaker’s Gift.” It was only after I had finished reading it, however – and after I had read the author’s notes, that I discovered I had also read the very first book Cohen Loigman had written, titled “The Two-Family House,” which was published in 2016.
That book had been chosen for what was then known as “The People of the Book Club” at the Rady JCC by the late Sharon Freed, who was the facilitator for that club. But, why would I write that I would think a book about matchmaking would be of particular interest to women? Maybe it’s because we tend to associate the profession of matchmaking with “Yenta the Matchmaker” from “Fiddler on the Roof,” more than anything else.
But, as I discovered during the course of reading “The Matchmaker’s Gift,” at least in New York in the early part of the 20th century, matchmaking as a profession within the Jewish community was reserved for men. In fact, that becomes one of the principal themes of the book, as we are introduced to a character by the name of Sara Glikman, who discovers, unbeknownst to her, that she has a rare and secret talent whereby she is able to determine a perfect match between two total strangers through some mystical power that she possesses.
In an earlier age no doubt Sara would have probably been considered a witch within different cultures. The notion of someone having fantastical powers is, of course, an enduring theme throughout history, and when those powers are set within a modern day context, they often become a source of amusement, as in all the superpower heroes that have come to dominate a good part of our culture.
Yet, in “The Matchmaker’s Gift,” Sara Glikman neither chooses to practice matchmaking nor does she relish the opportunity to engage in the craft. She simply comes to realize that she has a unique gift for being able to put unlikely couples together.
Parallel to Sara’s story we come to read about Sara’s granddaughter, Abby, who is a young lawyer in New York, and someone totally removed from the world of matchmaking – or so we are led to believe.
Cohen-Loigman interweaves the story of Sara’s forays into matchmaking with Abby’s very demanding legal career. The element that both women have in common is that they are able to recognize when two people are right for each other or, as is the case with Abby while she is working for a very hard driving attorney who specialized in putting together pre-nup agreements: when two people who are headed toward marriage – and seem to be compatible on the surface – are not at all right for each other.
Given how common it was for our ancestors to have been put together by way of a “shidduch,” or “match,” I’m sure that most of us would have wondered how those long-ago marriages would have worked out in this day and age. I can well recall watching my own maternal grandparents engaged in fierce arguments over the years when I was growing up. I wasn’t close enough to my paternal grandparents to notice whether the same applied to them, but while reading “The Matchmaker’s Gift,” memories of what seemed to be odd marriages did re-enter my mind.
Sara Glikman though, as talented as she may be with her supernatural ability to anticipate when two total strangers would make perfectly attuned marriage partners, does come up against the prevailing practice of the day, which is to have only men arrange marriages. Since she must keep her unique ability a secret, her carefully thought-out plans to bring various couples together once she discovers that they are meant for one another rely upon a great deal of deception and planned accidental meetings.
Once the male matchmakers of New York come to be aware of Sara’s forays into their world, however, she is brought forward in a “bet din” (house of judgment) where she is forced to account for her behavior.
Similarly, Sara’s granddaughter, Abby, has to defend herself when she is exposed as having intervened in a number of situations, either to stave off a doomed relationship or to facilitate one among unlikely mates. Her boss, Evelyn Morgan, is the consummate hard driving career woman who herself has no time for romance and once she realizes that Abby has actually been sabotaging Evelyn’s meticulous pre-nup work, all hell breaks loose.
It’s all quite endearing and really quite fantastical, but at the same time, after reading all of the information Beatty Cohan gives about online dating in her column this issue and how prominent a role it plays in determining relationships, especially, as Beatty notes, among gay men, I was intrigued enough to want to do more research about online dating among Jews in particular.
While it is still the case that, within the Orthodox Jewish community, the role of “matchmaker” is accorded a very special prominence, many non-Orthodox Jews also rely upon matchmakers, it turns out, especially within cities that have high Jewish populations.
According to an article on the “Israel Hayom” or “Israel Today” website, matchmaking among Jews has zoomed upwards in popularity since Covid. Many individuals were dissatisfied with such well-known apps as “JDate,” although a related app, “JSwipe,” has become the most popular app among Jews using apps to look for a relationship with other Jews.
According to that article, which you can find at ttps://www.israelhayom.com/2022/06/17/jewish-dating-game-sees-matchmaking-become-hottest-trend-in-us/, the frustration that so many Jewish users have had in using dating apps has contributed to a skyrocketing use of matchmaking within the Jewish community.
But, in “The Matchmaker’s Gift,” the notion that matchmaking would be superior to other forms of finding a mate is actually made fun of. Both Sara Glikman and her granddaughter Abby fight against prevailing ideas about matchmaking. Instead of seeing elements in common between the men and women who eventually end up getting matched by both Sara and Abby, they rely on some sort of mystical intervention to reveal who is best suited to whom. (Sara actually sees a “strand of golden light” forming a line between two strangers throughout her life.) Later, upon reading her grandmother’s journals, in which she has meticulously documented each of her matches, Abby at first scoffs at what she is reading, then comes to realize that everything was true.
It all makes for a terrific yarn, but in the end, perhaps the lesson to be learned, both from “The Matchmaker’s Gift” and what is going on in the contemporary Jewish dating world is that whatever works is valid.
Features
Fake IDs and Underage Bettors: The Growing Problem for Sportsbooks
The expansion of legalized sports betting worldwide has resulted in sportsbooks grappling with a problem that they can no longer overlook: the increase in underage individuals using counterfeit identification to place bets. As more and more ways to bet through mobile apps and online sign-ups emerge, minors who are set on their goal are inventing ways to get around age limits. The emergence of this trend is a breach of the law and morality; however, it is also an enormous problem that threatens the very existence of the platforms, which are forced to rigorously obey the regulations .
Why Fake IDs Are Becoming More Sophisticated
Conventional fakes used to be quite simple to recognize—low-quality printing, different fonts for the text, and inconsistent holograms would make them not very reliable for any kind of verification. But counterfeit documents have changed significantly over time. Nowadays, fakes are made better with the help of printing technology and software, and they can even copy barcodes and other scannable features, so their IDs look almost real.
This fact complicates things significantly for sportsbooks, especially those operating online. Most of the time, automated identity verification systems capture a user’s photo and perform basic data matching. In cases where a very good fake ID is used by a teenager who looks older, some systems cannot recognize the trick. Therefore, young bettors have found ways to be able to place wagers through these loopholes.
The Influence of Social Pressure and Online Culture
Social media is a major factor in the increase in risky behavior that minors are engaging in. On various platforms such as Instagram, TikTok, and Reddit, teenagers come across betting slips, parlay wins, and big-payout screenshots that are shared, most probably, by other users. The glamorization of sports betting is leading young people to copy the behavior of influencers, older friends, or even celebrities, as they think that it is the right thing to do.
The competitiveness usually associated with sports is one of the reasons some minors decide to bet on sports. For many, betting becomes another way to engage as a fan—by predicting outcomes, challenging friends, and experiencing the same excitement that adult fans enjoy. Unfortunately, only a small number of minors fully understand the financial risks involved, making them more vulnerable to developing harmful patterns that could continue into adulthood. This is why choosing the most responsible sportsbook, which you can discover more here, is essential. Such platforms provide guidance, enforce safe practices, and ensure regulated play, allowing fans to engage with sports betting in a more informed, secure, and controlled manner.
Sportsbooks Facing Regulatory Pressure
The sportsbooks are being given the task of more closely monitoring and preventing minors from betting on their platforms. If they fail, harsh penalties are possible, including severe fines, loss of a gambling license, and negative publicity that undermines a brand’s trustworthiness. As a result, it is becoming increasingly difficult for people to verify their identities, although this also inconveniences those who are, in fact, legitimate users.
Sportsbooks have to decide between two options that are in conflict with each other: on the one hand, they have to keep the registration process as simple as possible, and on the other hand, they have to carry out age verification in a very thorough manner. The work of balancing is tough, and the underage gamblers are trying all methods to find a way out.
The Rise of Identity Fraud Services
An alarming trend is the emergence of online vendors who openly advertise fake IDs and identity documents. These vendors often claim their products can pass standard sportsbook checks. Some even tailor IDs to specific regions, knowing that certain provinces, states, or countries use verification systems that rely heavily on image comparison rather than live validation.
The availability of these fraudulent services not only empowers minors but also exposes sportsbooks to risks related to stolen identities, money laundering flags, and fraudulent accounts that may later become legal liabilities.
The Consequences for Underage Bettors
While a minor might think that gambling is just a bit of fun without any harm, the outcome can be quite serious. If there is a catching, accounts are closed right away, winnings are confiscated, and parents or guardians, in some cases, are made legally liable for any financial disagreements. Besides that, the risk of developing a gambling problem in the future increases with early exposure to gambling, especially since teenagers are more impulsive and less capable of handling financial risks.
The majority of minors are not aware that sportsbooks keep very detailed records of their activities, including device information and IP addresses. In case a fake ID works one time, using it multiple times will definitely lead to getting caught.
A Growing Problem That Requires Joint Action
Fake IDs and underage betting are issues that have become a major challenge in the industry, and no single stakeholder can solve these problems on their own. Sportsbooks need to enhance their identity verifications, regulators should get prepared for new types of fraud, technology providers have to come up with new solutions more quickly, and parents should always be aware of what their children are doing online. The industry’s rapid development is making this problem more and more urgent because the number of minors trying to get around the safety measures is increasing.
Sports betting can serve as a fun and legal form of entertainment for adults, but the need to protect the youth is what defines the industry and ensures its survival in the long run. As the quality of fake IDs keeps improving and the online culture is more and more inclined to consider betting as a normal activity, sportsbooks must ensure that underage users do not have access and that the environment is safe for all users. They need to do this now more than ever.
Features
How Canadians Are Adapting to the Boom in Legal Sports Betting
Canada’s fan engagement with sports has been radically changed by the recent single-event legalized sports betting. In the past, this was something you could only do through offshore sites or informal pools, but now it has become a normal part of the Canadian sports culture, according to GamblingNews.com. Online sportsbooks are being established at the provincial level, and private operators are entering the regulated markets, so Canadians are discovering new means to entertain, grasp, and make correct decisions in sports betting.
Widespread Adoption Across Provinces
The implementation of legal sports betting has varied across Canada’s provinces, but uptake has been strong in all jurisdictions. With its liberal licensing regime, Ontario has emerged as the most lively market in the country, thus enabling a multitude of private sportsbooks to compete. In the rest of the provinces, there are mostly platform operators controlled by the government; however, users are still in a state of rapid adjustment to the broadened offerings and new ways of wagering. As accessibility gets better, Canadians are becoming more aware of the distinctions between markets, bonuses, and betting styles, which makes the transition seem more like a logical continuation of their current sports habits.
Increased Engagement with Sports and Data
Legal betting has had an influence on how sports are consumed by a lot of Canadians. Fans are following gambling news, analyzing games in detail, checking lines more carefully, following injuries, and using statistics to make the best decision. The game-day experience has been expanded by betting, which has thus motivated fans to retain basic team loyalty. The rise of data-driven content, such as odds breakdowns, predictive analytics, and expert commentary, has been instrumental in making sports more interactive. Rather than being a passive viewer, a Canadian is now engaging more with the numbers, trends, and probabilities, thereby deepening his/her understanding of the games.
Growth of Responsible Gambling Education
As betting gets more and more exposure, a conversation about safe play is also getting louder. Gambling organizations in Canada have put in place a variety of measures and have devoted a lot of resources to making gambling more responsible and safer. Users have changed their behavior as well; they are now more aware of tools such as deposit limits, time monitoring, self-exclusion programs, and reality checks. Different provinces put a lot of effort into education first, thus helping bettors notice the signs of risky behaviour and learn how to stay within healthy boundaries. This cultural change is contributing to the normalization of responsible gambling practices instead of being treated as a mere intervention.
The Social Element of Modern Betting
Since the legalization of sports betting in Canada, it has become much more of a social activity. People in their friend circles now talk about their bets, share parlays, and watch matches together, thus creating a new level of fun. Social media is very much involved in it as bettors post their predictions, celebrate their wins, or explain their unfortunate outcomes. There are more and more online communities dedicated to betting discussions, where people find wagering as a mutually enjoyable pastime rather than a lonely one. The feeling of togetherness is what makes Canadians use betting as a part of their sports routine in a joyful and engaging manner.
Adapting to the Variety of Betting Options
With the legalization of sports betting in Canada, there are now more options available that go beyond the typical single-game bets. Live betting, player props, same-game parlays, and futures markets have all become elements of the modern betting landscape. Such a variety demands the adaptation of the bettors, and a considerable number of them are figuring out the operating principles of each type, the value of the times when they offer, and the manner in which odds change dynamically. In addition, bettors are becoming acquainted with such concepts as payout volatility, implied probability, and risk management. The learning curve is definitely there, but it has also resulted in a richer and more strategic betting experience.
Integration of Betting in Sports Media
Wide channels and sports networks in Canada have been very much on board with the advent of the betting boom. Playouts of betting lines are part of the pre-game shows, analysts are using betting language patently to highlight something on the field, and treat the sports betting companies as a partner to a team or a league for branded content. Canadians are warming up to the reality where the provision of betting information is just a normal part of their sports coverage. The change is considerable, and it can be seen as a transitory moment when betting moved from being a small niche topic to becoming a standard element of sports entertainment.
A Growing but Responsible Cultural Shift
Canadians, in the wake of legalization, see sports betting as one natural way to extend their love for sports while recognizing the necessity of self-control. Thanks to enhanced access, better education, and more transparent platforms, the whole betting experience has become safer, more enjoyable, and more a part of the daily sports culture. Canadians, as the market expands, are creating a scenario where gambling becomes a tool for deepening their connection with sports rather than a source of anxiety.
Features
How to Start Dating Online in Canada, Especially Ontario
Online dating in Canada can be genuinely effective, but only if you approach it like a simple process instead of a high-stress hobby. Ontario is a good place to date online because the population density (especially around the GTA) creates more active pools, while smaller cities still have enough users if you set your filters intelligently.
This guide gives you a practical Ontario-focused playbook: how to start dating online, what to set up, how to message, how to move to an actual date, and how to protect your time and safety.
Quick-start plan for Ontario singles
| Step | What to do | Ontario-specific example | Common mistake to avoid |
| 1. Pick your lane | Choose 1–2 platforms based on your goal | Toronto: nearly any major app is active; smaller towns: broaden radius to nearby cities | Downloading 6 apps and burning out fast |
| 2. Build a “real” profile | 4–6 photos + short bio + 2 prompts | Add a local hook: “Best coffee spot in Ottawa?” or “Best weekend day trip from the GTA?” | Only selfies, no bio, or “ask me” |
| 3. Message with intent | 1 specific question + 1 next step | “Coffee or a walk this week?” | “Hey” and waiting for magic |
| 4. Move to a date quickly | Suggest a public, simple meet | “30–60 minutes at a cafe near Union Station” | Texting for 3 weeks, never meeting |
| 5. Use safety rules | Public first date, own transport, tell a friend | Share date location + time with a friend | First meeting at someone’s home |
| 6. Filter hard, stay kind | End mismatches early and politely | “I’m looking for something more serious—wishing you the best.” | Debating obvious red flags |
1) Choose apps based on what you want (not what’s trendy)
Before you pick anything, decide your “dating intention” for the next 30 days:
- Serious relationship-focused: choose platforms where profiles have prompts, values, and more context. These tend to produce better conversations and clearer intentions.
- Casual dating / exploring: faster, swipe-heavy apps can work if you’re direct and you don’t take it personally when people vanish.
- International or broader discovery: consider platforms that make cross-border matching and messaging easy, especially if your local pool feels repetitive.
Ontario tip: if you’re outside Toronto or Ottawa, don’t assume “online dating doesn’t work.” Often it’s a settings problem. Increase your radius to include a nearby hub (for example, Hamilton, Kitchener-Waterloo, London, or the GTA), and be open to meeting halfway.
2) Build a profile that feels human (and gets better matches)
Your profile isn’t a résumé. It’s a conversation starter. The best profiles do two things:
- show what you look like, clearly
- show what it might feel like to date you
Photos: a simple set that works
Aim for 4–6 photos:
- One clear face photo (good lighting, no sunglasses).
- One full-body photo (normal setting, not a bathroom mirror).
- One lifestyle photo (hobby, cooking, gym, hiking, reading, music).
- One “social proof” photo (with friends is fine, but make it obvious who you are).
- Optional: a photo that shows your vibe (casual, dressed up, outdoorsy, artsy).
Avoid extremes: all selfies, all group shots, all travel photos, or filters that change your face. You’re not advertising perfection. You’re signaling honesty.
Bio: a 3-line formula that converts
Use this structure:
- Who you are: one sentence
- What you want: one sentence
- Local hook: one sentence
Example bios (Ontario-ready):
- “Ontario-based, equal parts ambitious and laid-back. Looking for a real connection with someone emotionally mature. Tell me your go-to comfort food or your favorite hidden spot in your city.”
- “New-ish to the area and building a life I’m proud of. I’m dating with intention, but I like things to unfold naturally. Coffee dates and good conversation beat endless texting.”
- “I’m the type who plans a day trip and packs snacks. Looking for someone kind, consistent, and curious. Bonus points if you like markets, walks, and laughing at dumb jokes.”
3) Messaging that doesn’t sound like a bot
Most conversations die because people write low-effort openings. Your first message should be:
- specific
- easy to answer
- slightly playful or warm
- connected to their profile
Openers you can copy
- “You seem like someone with good taste—what’s a perfect Saturday for you?”
- “Quick question: coffee first date or a walk first date?”
- “You mentioned hiking—are you more ‘short scenic trail’ or ‘full-day mission’?”
- “What’s the most underrated place in your city for a chill date?”
- “Two truths and a lie—go.”
A realistic mini-script to move toward a date
- You: “I’m enjoying this chat. Want to keep it simple and do coffee this week?”
- Them: “Sure.”
- You: “Great. I’m free Thursday evening or Sunday afternoon. Which works?”
In Ontario, many people appreciate directness because schedules fill up quickly (commutes, hybrid work, family obligations). Clarity reads as confidence, not pressure.
4) First date ideas that work in Ontario year-round
Plan dates that survive weather and keep pressure low.
Best first-date formats:
- coffee/tea (60 minutes is perfect)
- casual lunch
- market + snack
- walk in a busy, public area (only if weather is decent)
- museum/gallery (good for conversation breaks)
Ontario-specific practical tip: keep the first meet short and public. If it’s going well, you can extend it. If it’s not, you can leave politely without feeling trapped.
5) Safety and boundaries (the non-negotiables)
Online dating is normal. Basic safety habits should be normal too.
Do this every time:
- meet in public for the first date
- use your own transportation
- tell a friend where you’re going and when you expect to be done
- keep personal details (address, workplace specifics) private until trust is earned
Watch for pressure signals:
- pushing to meet at their home immediately
- refusing a simple video call but demanding quick trust
- love-bombing (intense affection very early)
- turning the conversation toward money, “business,” or investments
If someone reacts badly to your boundaries, that’s useful information. It means your boundaries are working.
6) Ontario realities: age and alcohol
If you’re dating in Ontario, it’s also helpful to know common legal basics: the age of majority is 18, and the legal drinking age is 19. If you’re unsure or you’re traveling within Canada, double-check local rules, but those are the typical Ontario standards people plan around (especially when choosing bars or venues).
7) A simple 2-week routine that prevents burnout
If you want progress without turning dating into a second job:
Week 1
- build a solid profile (one evening)
- swipe/message 15–20 minutes per day
- aim for 5–10 quality conversations, not 100 matches
- propose 1–2 simple dates
Week 2
- go on those dates
- adjust your profile based on who you actually liked
- tighten filters (age range, distance, intentions) to reduce noise
Online dating improves fast when you treat it like an experiment: test, learn, refine. You don’t need more apps—you need better signals, clearer messaging, and consistent boundaries.
If you want, tell me your approximate age range and whether you’re aiming for serious, casual, or international dating, and I’ll tailor the examples (bio + openers + first-date ideas) specifically for Ontario in the same format.