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How Jewish parents can help kids deal with a flood of pain on social media — beyond just looking away
(JTA) — “Teenagers wake up in the morning. They get dressed, brush their teeth, and check their social media. But this technology is not just what they do, it is who they are.”
David wrote those sentences back in 2009. Now, almost 15 years later, this more true than ever for teens and tweens. Particularly with the catalyst of the pandemic, their lives often take place and connections are built through screens.
Since Oct. 7, as social media filled up with unspeakable images of the Hamas attack on Israel, countless articles quoted educational leaders urging parents to delete social media applications from their children’s devices. But offering parents one solution right now — to delete apps and try and prevent their children from seeing these images — is way too simplistic and perhaps even misguided.
The goal of that advice is to spare children from viewing the horrific images, emanating from Hamas, designed to instill fear in Israelis and all Jews around the world.
We support efforts to curtail the viewing and dissemination of these distressing posts; we now know that many of the videos are deliberately infected with falsehoods and malware to further intensify the terror, and we all need to safeguard our mental health and that of our loved ones. And we will be the first to recognize our own shortcomings as parents, especially in these challenging times.
So yes: As parents, our natural instinct is to protect our children. But as parents, and as a broader community, we can, and must do better than just telling people to look away from social media.
There has been violence and evil on these platforms before this week, and there will continue to be despicable content forevermore. Any Jewish educator involved with teaching the Holocaust has learned to navigate this.
Social media is also home to tremendous acts of kindness, philanthropy, compassion and goodwill. There are bonds and friendships formed and maintained on social media —and the distinction between virtual relationships and so-called “in-person” relationships is very blurry for tweens and teens. Many of our young people find social media, and the opportunity to express their authentic selves to their communities, to be a relief and a joy in a world that can be very lonely. To wholly disconnect children from social media is also to disconnect them from many of these positive attributes.
Parents at the very least should consider that the short-term need to protect their child might set up a confrontation that could pull them apart — at a moment when children may look to them for love, support and guidance.
Perhaps there is a middle ground. First, if parents gave permission to a child to install an app, they can also be responsible for ensuring the app is used in the right manner — much like parents will prepare a child to take public transportation for the first time or drive a car. The rules parents outline for social media also do not have to be static, and can change as rapidly as our understanding of the evolving situation changes.
Second, if parents believe they have the power of persuasion or coercion to delete social media from their child’s devices, parents also have the wherewithal to have a conversation with them. Talk about Israel right now, the power of social media and the pain and confusion of distressing videos.
And finally, if parents want to raise children who connect with their Israeli brothers and sisters beyond images of violence and vulnerability, they should give their children an affirming Jewish education (this might come across as a shameless plug for Jewish education — it is). We make no distinction between settings — day schools, congregational schools, Jewish summer camps, youth movements, or any other setting where Jewish learning takes place. It is not enough to be a parent who reacts when fearful; parents must also be proactive and give children the competencies and confidence to be able to take pride in their Jewish being — in good times and in bad.
A Jewish identity that is formed in reaction to hatred is not sustainable. It is natural that in moments when there is distress amongst the Jewish people, we will awaken to the depths of our innate bonds, and those instincts are beautiful. But without the building blocks of Jewish identity and joy to sustain our children throughout their lifelong Jewish journeys, affinity in moments of tragedy will not be enough.
Neither deleting apps nor sending children to a place of Jewish education absolves parents of their ultimate responsibility. The strength of all Jewish parents in the world combined cannot prevent these insidious images from entering a child’s device — even if it is stopped now, it is only a matter of time. Parents must learn and know and talk to their children, answer their questions, and be there for them and hug them, and talk to them about all of the good and the evil in this world.
Please protect your children. Also please help them acquire the tools that they need not just to weather these extremely dark days, but to thrive on the other side of this war.
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Candace Owens Barred From New Zealand After Facing Similar Ban From Australia for Comments on Jews, Holocaust
Right-wing political commentator Candace Owens speaks during an event held by national conservative political movement ‘Turning Point’, in Detroit, Michigan, US, June, 14, 2024. Photo: REUTERS/Rebecca Cook
Right-wing American political commentator and YouTube content creator Candace Owens has been denied a visa to enter New Zealand because she was banned from the nearby country Australia, immigration officials reportedly said on Thursday.
Owens was scheduled to embark on her first speaking tour across Australia and New Zealand in February and March of next year. The tour includes a stop in Auckland, New Zealand, on Feb. 28 and tickets remain on sale online.
Australia rejected her request for a visa last month. Australian Immigration Minister Tony Burke said the decision was made because of Owens’s past remarks, including her apparent denial that Nazis forcibly did medical experiments on Jews in concentration camps during World War II.
“From downplaying the impact of the Holocaust with comments about [Nazi doctor and war criminal Josef] Mengele through to claims that Muslims started slavery, Candace Owens has the capacity to incite discord in almost every direction,” Burke said at the time. “Australia’s national interest is best served when Candace Owens is somewhere else.
Jock Gilray, a spokesperson for New Zealand’s immigration agency, said on Thursday that Owens was refused an entertainer’s work permit for New Zealand because visas legally cannot be granted to someone who have been banned from another country, The Associated Press reported on Thursday. New Zealand officials did not refer to Owens’s past comments when announcing the denial of her visa.
Owens and the Australia-based promoter behind her speaking tour, Rocksman, have yet to comment on news regarding the ban from New Zealand but said in October that they will file a legal appeal to a federal judge in response to the ban from Australia. Owens commented on Burke’s decision to deny her a visa for Australia and blamed it partially on the alleged influence of the global “Zionist media empire.”
Owens, who has over 3 million subscribers on YouTube and hosts the podcast titled “Candace,” has promoted conspiracy theories and made numerous antisemitic comments about Israel, Jews, Zionists, and the Holocaust. She has also made controversial comments against Black Lives Matter, feminism, vaccines, and immigration.
The post Candace Owens Barred From New Zealand After Facing Similar Ban From Australia for Comments on Jews, Holocaust first appeared on Algemeiner.com.
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Israeli Bus Attacked in West Bank, At Least Eight Injured
Israeli police officer works at the scene of a shooting attack near the Jewish settlement of Ariel, in the West Bank, Nov. 29, 2024. Photo: REUTERS/Ammar Awad
A Palestinian opened fire on a Tel Aviv-bound Israeli bus near the Jewish settlement of Ariel in the West Bank on Friday, wounding at least eight people before he was killed by Israeli troops, the Israeli military said.
Israel‘s MDA medical service said four people suffered gunshot wounds, with three in a serious condition, and four others were hurt by flying glass.
The Palestinian Health Ministry identified the shooter as a 46-year-old local man. Hamas’s armed wing, the al-Qassam Brigades, said he belonged to the terrorist group.
Violence has surged across the West Bank since the start of the Hamas-Israel war in Gaza in October last year.
In the first six months of 2024, the West Bank experienced more than 500 Arab terrorist attacks each month on average, according to data made public by Hatzalah Judea and Samaria (Rescuers Without Borders).
Dozens of Israelis have been killed in Palestinian street attacks, Israeli authorities say, while hundreds of Palestinians — including armed fighters, stone-throwing youths, and civilian bystanders — have died in clashes with Israeli security forces.
The post Israeli Bus Attacked in West Bank, At Least Eight Injured first appeared on Algemeiner.com.
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The Winds Are Blowing Agains the Jewish People; But the Response to Chaos and Violent Protests Could Lead to a Reversal
A Torah scroll is seen on display at the Babylonian Jewry Heritage Center in Or Yehuda, Israel, April 16, 2018. Photo: Reuters / Amir Cohen.
People are asking why we are now experiencing such a tsunami of hatred — a kind of Ma Nishtana moment. There are very different factors that have come together to create a perfect storm of conflicting world and ethical values. Old certainties have died, and new ones are flourishing, and not always for the best. One can look at this from different perspectives — the historical, the social, the religious, and the long-term instability of societies and governments.
For thousands of years, the fate and role of societies have been determined by the people who exercised power and what religion or gods they adhered to. Power rose or fell violently and unpredictably. Authorities cared little for human life. Religions were supposed to take care of morality. Winners determined the fate of humans — who was accepted and who was not, or merely tolerated. Every country was guilty at some stage of abuse, and benefited from servitude. This does not mean one cannot try to make things better.
Throughout history, rival religions competed for supremacy and Jews were always caught in the middle. Judaism found itself attacked both by religions and by secular ideologies. And many Jews themselves abandoned their religion and culture ,and joined the different and conflicting ideologies and fought for recognition and rights for everyone. We expected to be hated by the European devils of Stalin and Hitler. But we never believed we would be hated by so many Americans. By Harvards and Columbias.
The First and the Second Great Wars were watersheds. They created new global rivalries and exacerbated cultural opposites. The dream that a United Nations could bring peace has been shattered by its politics. The dove of peace is crippled, and the lion will not lie down with the lamb. As many societies have advanced technologically, and billions were raised out of poverty and servitude, people began to talk about rights instead of obligations. And different groups who felt poorly treated, began to demand respect and amelioration.
Unfortunately, like all such movements, they developed into orthodoxies that allowed for no dissent or criticism. The current curse in the West is wokeism. And in the east, it is the curse of totalitarianism.
Another important factor in a changing world is migration. In the past, people fled prejudice, wars, and oppression. Many wanted a freer life and opportunities. And they integrated into the host societies. Ease of travel and access have now meant that larger numbers are fleeing, bringing with them values directly in conflict with host societies. The Western world is being and will continue to be challenged by massive immigration because it needs more workers to fill the gaps left by declining birthrates. In itself this is not a problem. But by refusing to deal with the issue of integration, by burying heads in sands, and now by fearing to act to remove those inciting hatred, it is only stoking up more chaos for the future. In many places, the character of nations has already begun to change.
Multiculturalism, once seen as an ideal, is now becoming a problem. It has led to a choice, between cultural capitulation and an alliance of false brothers, religious fundamentalists allied with left-wing progressives to gain power despite opposing values. One day, they may overturn states from within.
Some will argue that Israel is the cause of world dysfunction. Strange that such a small people are thought to have such influence. Others argue that Israel was a mistake, and all other states that emerged from the ashes of the Ottoman Empire are legitimate. And they argue that Israel has no right to defend itself. All these are both nonsensical and evidence of prejudice. And they simply reiterate what the Bible foretold, that we are people who are alone, not appreciated by other nations (Numbers 23:9).
If the world is bent on tearing itself apart, we can only look on in despair for them. And do our best to ensure that we are well protected.
All is not lost. There are signs of a reaction. The winds that bring storms can also revive and refresh.
Florence, Italy, in the 15th century was the pinnacle of wealth, culture, and influence. Its banking families controlled the Western world. The Franciscan monk Savonarola (1452-1498) attacked the power and the wealth of the wealthy rulers. But he went too far in destroying great art, music, and what he saw as luxury. Instead, he enforced dull pious conformity. For a while, he was successful. But people soon tired of it, and in the end, he was burnt as a heretic. After the French Revolution came the Reign of Terror. Let us hope it won’t happen now.
The author is a writer and rabbi, based in New York.
The post The Winds Are Blowing Agains the Jewish People; But the Response to Chaos and Violent Protests Could Lead to a Reversal first appeared on Algemeiner.com.