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This Jewish couple ended their three-country wedding tour with a colorful Oaxacan ceremony
(JTA) — For the third of their three weddings, Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel set up a chuppah in Oaxaca, the Mexican city where they first confessed their love for each other.
Oaxaca is a vibrant hub of Mexican folk art and incredible food, but Jewish life? Not so much. Nonetheless the couple chose there to wed in an egalitarian Jewish ceremony led by the groom’s sister, Libby Smoler, on Feb 26. And when seven family members and friends gave their own interpretations of the seven traditional blessings, one of Applebaum’s sisters wished them a lifetime of adventures and delicious meals.
The wedding came just over three years after the pair met — online, from their parents’ houses early in the pandemic.
Applebaum’s parents weren’t subtle about wading into her dating life after she moved home to Portland, Maine, in early 2020, the only one of their four children to do so. Her father showed her a video about dating apps and her mother asked her for a demonstration.
Applebaum, 35, downloaded Hinge. The next thing she knew, her mother was hooked. “She’s swiping and swiping, and saying, ‘This is fabulous,’” Applebaum recalled, adding with a joke, “I told her, ‘You have to have some standards.’”
In Los Angeles, where Applebaum had been living, she had been focused first on her job as a producer of external communications for the educational technology division of the World Bank, and her all-consuming side project as the founder of Future of Women, which hosts breakfast events around the world and hosts a podcast for women leaders.
But in her childhood home, with no timeline for when life would resume, she decided to dive into dating, drawing on her extensive experiences living and traveling abroad to experiment with what would generate the most promising results.
“I put my location as different places, like Mexico City or London, for the fun of it,” she said. “When we were so isolated, to have contact with people in these places was nice. But, then, I put myself in a more realistic location.”
That location was New York City, where she soon encountered Raffel, an attorney in the tech industry.
Elan Raffel breaks the glass during his wedding ceremony with Hallie Applebaum, in Oaxaca, Mexico, Feb. 26, 2023. (Mónica Godefroy)
The pair matched and soon learned that they had a lot in common. Like Applebaum, Raffel had moved back in with his parents at the start of the pandemic — in his case Pikesville, a heavily Jewish suburb of Baltimore. Both had attended Jewish day schools growing up; both had spent time living abroad (Applebaum in Guatemala, Ecuador and while pursuing a master’s degree at the London School of Economics and Raffel in his mother’s native Israel); and both enjoyed fine food and off-the-beaten-path adventures.
After months of phone calls and probing conversations — some fueled by “The 36 Questions that Lead to Love” as appeared in The New York Times — they decided that Raffel would join Applebaum for a camping trip in Maine’s Acadia National Park.
“We had an out,” Raffel recalled. “If either of us had a terrible experience, we could back out.”
That wasn’t needed. Instead, they extended their time together — after kicking it off with an unplanned first meeting for Raffel with Applebaum’s parents when she forgot a cooler of food at their house.
“We joke that our first date was two weeks long,” said Raffel.
Soon after, Applebaum met Raffel’s family for Rosh Hashanah dinner. Then, Raffel rented a home in Los Angeles after Applebaum returned there.
With remote work the norm, and a few months dating now behind them, they began considering living and working elsewhere. They decided on Mexico, spending one month in Merida and one month in Oaxaca.
With its vibrant food scene and colorful arts and culture, the couple both fell in love with Oaxaca, and with each other. It was there that they first said, “I love you.”
Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel pose with dancers who joined their public wedding procession in Oaxaca. (Mónica Godefroy)
They returned to Mexico in the summer of 2022 while their new condo in Santa Monica was undergoing renovations; it was there that they became engaged. They now regularly host Shabbat dinners in their L.A. home through the nonprofit OneTable.
The first of their three wedding ceremonies took place on Sept. 30, 2022, when they were legally married at the Los Angeles County Courthouse.
The next event took place in Israel, where Raffel’s mother had long hoped that one of her three children would marry. He was her last hope, so the couple said yes to what they thought would be a small wedding there planned by her.
But Shuli Raffel’s plans grew larger and larger, until finally, Applebaum’s parents decided to come and her London-based sister, too. Rabbi Shira Levine of Kibbutz Hanaton, rooted in the Conservative movement of Judaism, officiated a religious ceremony on Oct. 14 at Bistro de Carmel in Zichron Ya’akov with 90 guests present.
Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel held one wedding ceremony in Israel, where Raffel’s mother is from. (Taylor Applebaum)
Levine had guided the couple via video calls in writing their own text for the Jewish wedding contract, the ketubah.
“We spoke to the rabbi about our relationship, our household, and how do we make this concrete and what traditional things do we want to modify and make more egalitarian,” Applebaum said, adding, “Since I do a lot of work in women’s empowerment, it was important to me to have a woman rabbi.”
Then, over Thanksgiving weekend, the couple held an Israeli brunch in Philadelphia, attended by their grandmothers — Applebaum’s is 102 — who would not be traveling to Mexico. From there, they flew directly to Oaxaca for a menu tasting, where, because Applebaum is vegetarian, it fell to Raffel to try all the fish and meat options they might offer their guests.
The couple returned to Oaxaca for the main affair — a multi-day event that included a day-long tour to a facility where mezcal, a Oaxacan spirit, is made; visits to craftspeople; and two nights of dinners.
On Feb. 26, they had their third and final wedding in front of 72 guests at Cardenal Oaxaca, an events venue. Spicy pineapple mezcal cocktails kicked off the celebration, and a festive meal that won accolades even from foodie guests followed the ceremony.
At their Oaxaca wedding, Hallie Applebaum and Elan Raffel served guests a native corn milk epazote sponge cake with lime cream. (Hallie Applebaum)
“It was amazing,” said Ori Zohar, a guest who is also the co-founder of spice company Burlap & Barrel. “The wedding meal was a procession of Mexican and Oaxacan specialties with an international twist. Beets were grilled and paired with pumpkin seeds and pickled mustard seeds. Duck enchiladas came slathered in a black mole sauce and aged cheese. The main dishes were shared plates, so each guest got to try a little of everything before going back and polishing off the rest of their favorite.”
In one highlight of the day, the couple partook in a local custom where tall likenesses of the couple are made out of paper maché and carried, and people toast the bride and groom. It was, Applebaum said, a perfect way to show off a beloved place to their friends and family.
“Our guests went from this beautiful ceremony that his sister put together,” she said, “to being immersed in this celebration in the streets.”
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The three responses to the Bondi Beach Hanukkah attack that could make Jews safer
After two gunmen opened fire at a Hanukkah celebration on Sydney’s Bondi Beach, killing at least 11 people and wounding dozens more, the world is asking urgent questions: Could this be the first of many such attacks? Who might be behind it? And how can we prevent the next tragedy?
Was Iran involved?
Iran, with its long history of using proxies and terrorism, naturally comes to mind. Israeli intelligence has publicly warned that Tehran remains highly motivated to target Israeli and Jewish interests abroad.
Reports suggest that Israeli agencies have assessed not only that Iran has the intent, but that it also possesses the capability to use its networks — through Hezbollah, Hamas, and other proxy groups — to strike outside the Middle East. Western governments, including Australia, the U.S., and members of the EU, have acknowledged Iranian intelligence activity on their soil.
The motivation is clear: Israel’s military strike damaged Iranian infrastructure and positions in June, followed shortly by U.S. attacks that compounded the damage and were widely celebrated in Israel and by Jewish communities. To Iran’s benighted regime, they were provocations that demanded a response. Certainly some of the investigation into the Bondi Beach attack will look in that direction.
But focusing solely on Iran risks missing a more immediate and pervasive danger: Violence against Jews does not require orchestration by a foreign state. The conditions that make it possible — and increasingly thinkable — are already everywhere.
Terrorism against Jews has gone global
Terrorism is tragically easy to carry out. Only two months ago, two Jews were killed by a Muslim attacker on Yom Kippur who rammed a car into a crowd outside a synagogue in England and attacked people with knives.
And while the UK and Australia severely restrict access to weapons, nowhere in the developed world is mad violence easier to orchestrate than in the United States. Firearms are cheap, accessible, and legal for virtually anyone, and the sheer size of the country makes monitoring and security far more difficult than in smaller, more centralized nations. Lone actors can wreak destruction on a scale that would be unthinkable elsewhere. If one wanted to locate the most vulnerable place for ideologically motivated attacks, the United States sits uncomfortably near the top.
Motivation for such violence has been growing steadily. Antisemitic attacks have increased across the Western world, and the way the Gaza war unfolded has only accelerated the trend. The narrative of “genocide” has become increasingly entrenched, making it harder for Jews to occupy the once-unquestioned moral space: I still defend Israel and should not be attacked for it. That space is collapsing.
“The idea that Jews collectively bear responsibility for Israel’s actions is seeping into public consciousness in ways that make massacres like Bondi Beach more thinkable, if not inevitable.”
Dan Perry
Polls now show that roughly half of Americans believe Israel is committing genocide in Gaza. Substantial minorities go further, rationalizing recent attacks against Jews as “understandable” or even “justified.” These numbers do not indicate majority support for violence, but they are significant enough to suggest that moral restraints are weakening.
This shift is particularly pronounced among younger generations, where hostility toward Israel has become a moral baseline. It does not automatically translate into action, but it lowers the social cost of excusing violence. The idea that Jews collectively bear responsibility for Israel’s actions is seeping into public consciousness in ways that make massacres like Bondi Beach more thinkable, if not inevitable.
The situation is compounded by Israel’s current government. Its policies and rhetoric have alienated large swathes of the global community, including non-orthodox Jews in the United States. The government’s posture — contemptuous, dismissive, and occasionally openly sneering — makes the work of diplomats, community leaders, and advocates far more difficult. Israel’s failure to convey a nuanced understanding abroad of the delicacy of its own situation, nor give any inkling of introspection about its conduct in Gaza, feeds perceptions of illegitimacy and exacerbates antisemitism.
So, what can be done?
The 3 ways to make Jewish communities safer
First, Jewish communities must assume that maximal security at every event, and certainly on holidays and around landmarks, is essential not optional. Every public event, school, and institution should be protected at the highest feasible level. Prudence demands it. Governments that claim to protect minorities must fund and sustain this protection, not treat it as an emergency add-on after tragedy strikes.
Second, political leadership matters. World leaders must speak clearly and forcefully against antisemitic violence. Silence or hedging is read as permission. Muslim leaders, in particular, should speak plainly: Condemning attacks on Jews is not an endorsement of Israel, nor a betrayal of Palestinian suffering — it is an assertion of basic moral boundaries. President Donald Trump, despite his many failings, has a unique capacity to apply pressure. If he insisted publicly that major figures in the Muslim world denounce antisemitic violence, he could secure statements and commitments that might otherwise be unattainable. That could save lives.
Finally, Israel itself must confront its role. The current government has become a strategic liability — not just for Israel’s security, but for Jews worldwide. Its policies, tone, and posture have helped create the conditions in which antisemitism flourishes abroad. This in no way justifies attacks on Jews, but we must live in the real world that can be cruel, indifferent, superficial and unfair.
A government that understands the global stakes, communicates openness to the world, respects the diversity of the Jewish diaspora, and approaches foreign and domestic policy with nuance and restraint would do enormous good. It would not eliminate the threat overnight, but it would drastically reduce the conditions that allow such hatred to grow. Replacing the current government with one capable of such diplomacy and moral awareness could, in a sense, be the most effective preventive measure of all.
The Bondi Beach massacre is a devastating warning. It is a tragedy that could have happened anywhere and serves as a grim reminder that antisemitic violence is an urgent threat to Jews everywhere.
The post The three responses to the Bondi Beach Hanukkah attack that could make Jews safer appeared first on The Forward.
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U.S. leaders condemn ‘vile act of antisemitic terror’ after deadly Hanukkah attack in Australia
American politicians responded early Sunday to devastating reports from Sydney, Australia, where at least 11 people were killed during a Hanukkah celebration at the popular Bondi Beach on the first night of Hanukkah. Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese called the terror attack an “act of evil antisemitism” that targeted Australia’s Jewish community.
Some elected officials struck a somber tone, while others drew political conclusions.
Secretary of State Marco Rubio issued a brief statement condemning the attack and said that “antisemitism has no place in this world.”
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said on Sunday that the Australian government’s decision to recognize a Palestinian state earlier this year encouraged “the Jew-hatred now stalking your streets.”
Sen. Lindsey Graham, Republican of South Carolina, tied the attack to the Israel-Hamas war, sending a warning to governments that support the unilateral recognition of an independent Palestinian state before Hamas is disarmed. “When you appease those who kill Jews, you get more killing of Jews,” Graham said in an interview on Fox News’ Sunday Morning Futures.
Sen. John Fetterman, a pro-Israel Democrat from Pennsylvania, echoed that sentiment on the same program, saying that anti-Israel protests in recent years have “penetrated” into violent attacks on Jews. “Just call it what it is,” Fetterman said. “Antisemitism is a worldwide scourge, and it’s constantly demonstrated to be deadly.”
Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, who is Jewish, posted on X that the attack is a “shocking reminder that antisemitism and hate is not only toxic and far too present and widespread around the world, it is deadly. It must be vigorously condemned, confronted and overcome.”
New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani issued a statement, posted on his social media accounts, calling the attack a “vile act of antisemitic terror” and “the latest, most horrifying iteration in a growing pattern of violence targeted at Jewish people across the world.”
Mamdani, an outspoken critic of Israel whose statements on the conflict and refusal to disavow the “globalize the Intifada” slogan have roiled and divided the Jewish community, said the deadly attack should be met with urgent action to counter antisemitism. He also reiterated his pledge to “work every day to keep Jewish New Yorkers safe — on our streets, our subways, at shul, in every moment of every day.” New York City is home to the largest concentration of Jews in the United States.
Outgoing New York City Mayor Eric Adams said the police department will provide additional security at public menorah lightings across the city. New York Gov. Kathy Hochul said the state police will assist with protection. “New York will always stand against the scourge of antisemitism and confront violence head-on,” Hochul added.
Brad Lander, the outgoing New York City Comptroller who is Jewish, and also running for Congress, also highlighted the heroism of a local man, Ahmed al-Ahmed, who put his own life at risk by running behind one of the gunmen and tackling and disarming him. Lander mourned the killing of a Chabad of Bondi’s Rabbi Eli Schlanger.
“Our menorahs tonight will also be yahrzeit candles — with grief for this grievous loss and rededication to shine brighter than slaughter and hate,” Lander wrote on X.
The post U.S. leaders condemn ‘vile act of antisemitic terror’ after deadly Hanukkah attack in Australia appeared first on The Forward.
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Timeline: How attacks on Jews in Australia have been growing since Oct. 7
The mass shooting at a Hanukkah celebration on Sydney’s Bondi Beach on Sunday marked a grim new chapter in a pattern Australian officials have been tracking for more than two years: the steady escalation of antisemitic threats, from harassment and vandalism to arson, attempted attacks on synagogues and, now, mass-casualty violence at a public Jewish gathering.
Police said at least 11 people were killed, including a rabbi, when a gunman opened fire on families celebrating the first night of Hanukkah at the Chabad event, known as “Chanukah by the Sea.” Federal and state leaders swiftly condemned the attack as antisemitic terrorism and pledged a full national security response.
For Australia’s Jewish community, which numbers around 100,000, the shooting shattered any remaining sense that the country’s recent antisemitic incidents — alarming as they were — remained largely isolated and contained. Some of those attacks, including the Dec. 2024 firebombing of a kosher restaurant and a firebombing of a Melbourne synagogue that same month, were linked to potential Iran involvement.
Sunday’s attack followed mounting warnings from law enforcement and Jewish organizations that antisemitism in Australia had entered a more dangerous phase since Hamas attacked Israel on Oct. 7, 2023 and the war in Gaza ensued.
Below is a timeline of major recent antisemitic incidents in Australia, as authorities and Jewish groups charted an intensifying threat.
July 2025
Australia’s antisemitism envoy reported a dramatic rise in attacks against Jews, citing more than 2,000 cases in the year following Oct. 7 — an increase of more than 300% compared with the previous year.
July 2025
A man set fire to the front door of a synagogue in Melbourne while congregants were inside for Shabbat dinner, as a separate group of protesters stormed an Israeli restaurant nearby. No one was injured in either attack, police said, adding that the synagogue fire was quickly extinguished and that one person was arrested after demonstrators chanting anti-Israel slogans disrupted the restaurant.
Feb. 2025
Two nurses at a Sydney hospital were arrested after they threatened to kill Israeli patients in a video that went viral. It was an episode officials described as emblematic of how antisemitic rhetoric had seeped into workplaces and public institutions.
Feb. 2025
Police in Melbourne arrested a man accused of scrawling antisemitic graffiti in a park and throwing a packet of bacon at a passerby who confronted him.
Feb. 2025
A cluster of incidents in Sydney’s southeast suburbs, home to a large Jewish community, raised alarm among authorities. Antisemitic graffiti was sprayed on cars, homes and on a Jewish elementary school.
Jan. 2025
Police discovered explosives in a camper van in Sydney, saying the device may have been intended for a mass-casualty attack targeting Jews. Police later revealed that the plot was an elaborate hoax masterminded by a crime boss.
Jan. 2025
Two synagogues in Sydney were vandalized on successive days with swastikas and other antisemitic slogans. The attacks also included a nearby home that was defaced with an anti-Jewish slur.
Dec. 2024
The Australian government formed a national antisemitism task force, signaling a shift toward treating antisemitic violence as a coordinated security threat rather than isolated hate crimes.
Dec. 2024
Arsonists firebombed an historic synagogue in Melbourne, causing congregants gathered for morning services to flee. At least one person was injured and the building suffered extensive damage.
In Aug. 2025, federal authorities announced charges in the case and said intelligence agencies were examining evidence of foreign-linked coordination. Officials publicly alleged Iranian involvement, escalating the case into a matter of international security, and expelled from the country Ambassador Ahmad Sadeghi and three other Iranian officials.
October 2024
On Bondi Beach, where the Dec. 2025 shooting took place, arsonists first attacked a brewery which they had incorrectly identified as a kosher caterer. They went back and set fire to the caterer’s building a few days later. Authorities eventually revealed they thought the attacks were done at the behest of Iran. That same month, antisemitic graffiti appeared on a Jewish bakery in Sydney.
May 2024
Vandals sprayed antisemitic graffiti on a Jewish school in Melbourne. School officials increased security amid concerns about copycat attacks.
Feb. 2024
Pro-Palestinian activists made public the personal details of hundreds of Jewish academics, artists and professionals who had participated in a private WhatsApp group. The leak triggered a wave of harassment, prompting at least one family to go into hiding. The episode drew condemnation from federal leaders and warnings from police that online targeting could translate into real-world violence.
Dec. 2023
The Executive Council of Australian Jewry reported a sharp spike in antisemitic incidents in the weeks following Oct. 7, including threats, harassment, vandalism and intimidation. The increase prompted expanded security at synagogues, schools and community centers across major cities.
Nov. 2023
A Melbourne synagogue was ordered to evacuate during Friday night Shabbat services as police responded to nearby pro-Palestinian demonstrations. About 150 congregants had gathered at Central Shul in Caulfield when authorities advised them to leave as a precaution.
Oct. 2023
Two days after Hamas’ Oct. 7 attack on Israel, the Sydney Opera House was lit up in the colors of the Israeli flag and was expected to draw Jews looking for a public space to mourn. Instead, it drew more than 1,000 pro-Palestinian protesters, some of whom spewed antisemitic slogans and rhetoric.
The post Timeline: How attacks on Jews in Australia have been growing since Oct. 7 appeared first on The Forward.